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trying to be like them

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Yes! I start to laugh like them, my voice starts to sound like them and I find

myself wanting them to be totally comfortable, while I make adjustments to

them....I know I'm just happy to have them as a friend. I totally lose myself in

them. T

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Barbara, you perfectly described what I used to do (as recently as 2 years ago).

Therapy really helped me understand why I was doing this--I had NO voice in my

family--and define what I do believe and feel.

I was the good girl everyone could depend on and the favorite (this is how they

kept me in line by reminding me of this). But as soon as I expressed my opinion

or if I said something that went against the party line, I was put back in my

place.

So now I consciously say what I mean, instead of what I think i'm supposed to

say. It's not easy but I'm much better at tolerating others' disagreement or

even dislike of what I've said. As Doug likes to say, " welcome to my sandbox!! "

I love that one.

>

> Yes! I start to laugh like them, my voice starts to sound like them and I find

> myself wanting them to be totally comfortable, while I make adjustments to

> them....I know I'm just happy to have them as a friend. I totally lose myself

in

> them. T

>

>

>

>

>

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