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obsession strikes again

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I HATE this about myself. I am really upset over a work episode today that is no

big deal but I can't let it go. I walked over to my boss and this guy I work

with who has the same position as me. I accidentally interrupted them and boss

walked away. I said to the other guy, " I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. "

Other guy: " Why? You do it all the time. "

me: " Really? I'm sorry. "

other guy, " Don't apologize to ME " the tone being apologize to the other guy

So I did and he said, " I'm used to it by now. "

No one said don't worry about it. I didn't even realize I was doing that and I

feel really bad and stupid. I just can't let it go. As far as I know I have a

good working relationship with these people. We always joke around and I think

they like me. Now this small thing is spiraling into me doubting if I am good at

my job!

WHY WHY WHY do I obsess and over-analyze like this?

Actually I just remembered something my T told me: obsessive people do this in

order to try to gain some control or feel better about the fact that the world

is unpredictable. Find security somehow. What's more insecure than growing up

w/ a BPD parent? She said out of all the psych issues I could have developed,

this is the best one as it is the most manageable. But still, I am really upset

over this incident to the point that I just can't relax right now.

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