Re: dealing with the leftovers

[Guest guest]

Yes. Yes! YES!

We were the leftovers. We lived on the leftovers. And our asses are

kicked by the leftovers of nada.

I might suggest 2 resources that may be of help to you. One is

Breaking the Cycle of Hurtful Family Experiences, Dr McGee, and

the Other is Intimacy Anorexia. ( intimacyanorexia.com )

by Dr Doug Weiss.

And Yes, it can be lifelong work. And yes, some days I m just friggin

tired of trying, caring, hurting, dealing. Tired of being depressed and

feeling like a piece of shit.

Yep. You re not alone sister.

Doug

>

> Sometimes I just get sick and tired of dealing with my issues left

over from trauma.... mom=bp, dad=child mol

>

> Depression, no sex drive, anxiety, ...

> I worry that I cant be what my husband wants or needs (even after 13

years of marriage) which makes me anxious, which makes me depressed,

which makes me not want to do anything, which makes me angry, which

makes me anxious, which makes me depressed...(around and around and

around and around... )

>

> Sex is the same thing.... I dont want to have sex.. ever... then I

feel guilty, he feels undesirable, he feels frustrated, then I feel

anxious, then I feel depressed, then ask myself why I cant just

change... then feel angry, then feel more depressed and more anxious...

(and around and around and around... )

>

> Sometimes this cycle seems to just get the best of me... feels kinda

like I am out of control of everything... (which begins the whole cycle

again)...

>

> Sorry, just been in a funk this week... cant seem to dig out of this

cycle... therapist says dealing with so much trauma can be life long

work... well, some days I just want to say, " I am sick of trying!!!!!I

am sick of the " work " ... I hate the depression, the " triggers " , the

self-loathing....

>

> I'm just saying....

>

> ugh... just needed to vent... sorry

>

[Guest guest]

I can tell with your words how much you " get it " ... Thanks... nice to know

others out there... I always enjoy your posts... jen

> >

> > Sometimes I just get sick and tired of dealing with my issues left

> over from trauma.... mom=bp, dad=child mol

> >

> > Depression, no sex drive, anxiety, ...

> > I worry that I cant be what my husband wants or needs (even after 13

> years of marriage) which makes me anxious, which makes me depressed,

> which makes me not want to do anything, which makes me angry, which

> makes me anxious, which makes me depressed...(around and around and

> around and around... )

> >

> > Sex is the same thing.... I dont want to have sex.. ever... then I

> feel guilty, he feels undesirable, he feels frustrated, then I feel

> anxious, then I feel depressed, then ask myself why I cant just

> change... then feel angry, then feel more depressed and more anxious...

> (and around and around and around... )

> >

> > Sometimes this cycle seems to just get the best of me... feels kinda

> like I am out of control of everything... (which begins the whole cycle

> again)...

> >

> > Sorry, just been in a funk this week... cant seem to dig out of this

> cycle... therapist says dealing with so much trauma can be life long

> work... well, some days I just want to say, " I am sick of trying!!!!!I

> am sick of the " work " ... I hate the depression, the " triggers " , the

> self-loathing....

> >

> > I'm just saying....

> >

> > ugh... just needed to vent... sorry

> >

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

no need to apologize!  we all need to vent sometimes, me too.. and esp us ko's

who have sex abuse as part of the bpd package.. 

what do you do for fun?  just to get 'out of yourself' for awhile?  how about

a soothing bubble bath, a massage (even your husband might want to participate..

if that feels at all safe to you), a walk around the block or other exercise, a

good book, a movie.. you deserve to pamper yourself sometimes, life is not all

work on issues, it can be enjoyed if you try i think.blessings, ann

Subject: dealing with the leftovers

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Date: Thursday, September 30, 2010, 10:21 PM

 

Sometimes I just get sick and tired of dealing with my issues left over

from trauma.... mom=bp, dad=child mol

Depression, no sex drive, anxiety, ...

I worry that I cant be what my husband wants or needs (even after 13 years of

marriage) which makes me anxious, which makes me depressed, which makes me not

want to do anything, which makes me angry, which makes me anxious, which makes

me depressed...(around and around and around and around... )

Sex is the same thing.... I dont want to have sex.. ever... then I feel guilty,

he feels undesirable, he feels frustrated, then I feel anxious, then I feel

depressed, then ask myself why I cant just change... then feel angry, then feel

more depressed and more anxious... (and around and around and around... )

Sometimes this cycle seems to just get the best of me... feels kinda like I am

out of control of everything... (which begins the whole cycle again)...

Sorry, just been in a funk this week... cant seem to dig out of this cycle...

therapist says dealing with so much trauma can be life long work... well, some

days I just want to say, " I am sick of trying!!!!!I am sick of the " work " ... I

hate the depression, the " triggers " , the self-loathing....

I'm just saying....

ugh... just needed to vent... sorry