Re: Carolyn

[Guest guest]

Hi, Carolyn,

I found once I stopped overeating at night, I was in fact hungry in the mornings, when I'd never before been. I'd always thought I was "just one of those people" who don't get hungry in the mornings.

About the feeling of not having anything to offer professionally: Caroline Knapp's book "Appetites: Why Women Want" addresses the conundrum that educated women find themselves in, where they would like to have the power that comes with authority, but have little social support (in the society at large, mainly) for doing that and still feeling "feminine." It's a complicated issue, but I'm convinced this is behind some of my similar ambivalence about my own abilities, despite evidence to the contrary. Knapp feels this is one reason women turn to eating disorders--to give themselves distraction from the complexity of this situtation, and also some small corner of the world where they can either exert strong control (as in anorexia or restrictive dieting), or fret endlessly about their lack of control (overeating and bingeing). Food for thought, to be sure.

Laurie

Carolyn

Thank you for the welcome! Good Thursday morning everyone! I hope you all are on the way to a successful intuitive eating day. Yesterday wasn't as successful for me as it could have been in this regard...

I have cream in my coffee in the morning, which seems to satiate me and then at mid day I had a small bagel with a bit of butter and marmalade. For supper which didn't happen until about 9:00 last night we had an assortment of Chinese food dishes and this is where I ended up eating more than my body needed. In fact my stomach was uncomfortable in the middle of the night.

I feel like I am perhaps not eating enough throughout the day, but, if I don't feel 'real' hunger during these times I don't want to eat just for the sake of eating. I guess it is going to take time for me to learn what my body is actually telling me. I know that yesterday it was too long from the time I had the little bagel in the afternoon until supper and so I was too hungry and then ate too late before bedtime. Also, I haven't allowed myself to eat Chinese food (of this nature) more than a couple times in the past few years. While others have had the sweet and sour, chow mein, breaded almond chicken, spring rolls, etc, I have only had vegetable/chicken/almond dish and plain rice. So naturally, simply being able to taste these dishes again was enjoyable.

I have been reading the other posts and reading about people with PhD's and doctorates and 'still' a perfectionist way of being is lingering around! Uggg! I can so sympathize with you. One of the most difficult things that I face is feeling that I have anything of value to offer to others, not my family and friends, I am fine there; but, in my professional life! Yet, I too am studying and working on Graduate level studies right now and all going according to plan will graduate with a Master's degree in spring 2012. I am hoping that as I work on listening to my body, with this new way of eating, I will also begin to move forward with more appreciation for what 'I' do contribute to my profession.

Thanks for the listen. I do not have the book Intutive Eating, but, I do have the Women Food and God book and would appreciate a book study of this book. In fact I am thinking of leading a book study/spiritual direction program with a group of women in the fall with this book as a basis.

Carolyn

[Guest guest]

Carolyn's post reminded me that a while back I googled for I.E. groups meeting

in my area (S.F. Bay Area) but didn't find any. Just wondering if such groups

exist anywhere. Actually, online forums often work better for me, particularly

with time management.

Virginia

>

> Thank you for the welcome! Good Thursday morning everyone! I hope you all

are on the way to a successful intuitive eating day. Yesterday wasn't as

successful for me as it could have been in this regard...

>

> I have cream in my coffee in the morning, which seems to satiate me and then

at mid day I had a small bagel with a bit of butter and marmalade. For supper

which didn't happen until about 9:00 last night we had an assortment of Chinese

food dishes and this is where I ended up eating more than my body needed. In

fact my stomach was uncomfortable in the middle of the night.

>

> I feel like I am perhaps not eating enough throughout the day, but, if I don't

feel 'real' hunger during these times I don't want to eat just for the sake of

eating. I guess it is going to take time for me to learn what my body is

actually telling me. I know that yesterday it was too long from the time I had

the little bagel in the afternoon until supper and so I was too hungry and then

ate too late before bedtime. Also, I haven't allowed myself to eat Chinese food

(of this nature) more than a couple times in the past few years. While others

have had the sweet and sour, chow mein, breaded almond chicken, spring rolls,

etc, I have only had vegetable/chicken/almond dish and plain rice. So naturally,

simply being able to taste these dishes again was enjoyable.

>

> I have been reading the other posts and reading about people with PhD's and

doctorates and 'still' a perfectionist way of being is lingering around! Uggg!

I can so sympathize with you. One of the most difficult things that I face is

feeling that I have anything of value to offer to others, not my family and

friends, I am fine there; but, in my professional life! Yet, I too am studying

and working on Graduate level studies right now and all going according to plan

will graduate with a Master's degree in spring 2012. I am hoping that as I work

on listening to my body, with this new way of eating, I will also begin to move

forward with more appreciation for what 'I' do contribute to my profession.

>

> Thanks for the listen. I do not have the book Intutive Eating, but, I do

have the Women Food and God book and would appreciate a book study of this book.

In fact I am thinking of leading a book study/spiritual direction program with a

group of women in the fall with this book as a basis.

>

> Carolyn

>

[Guest guest]

Hi, Carolyn,

Is there no way you can have a different outfit available to wear for this occasion? Is this some kind of command wearing, like being a bridesmaid? If not, please consider finding an alternative outfit if for no other reason than to take the pressure off yourself. It sounds like maybe you're in a rebellion mode because of the stricture that you "have to" fit into this outfit.

If for some reason you can't change the outfit, at least try to be aware of this backlash for the future, so that you can avoid puttiing yourself in this kind of situation again. Forcing yourself to fit into a certain smaller-than-you-are outfit by a certain date is unrealistic, and it is unkind to yourself, and it sets you up for weight gain and feelings of failure. You SO don't deserve this!

Getting your thyroid checked is an excellent idea and should be something every person does annually, but please be aware that getting treated for hypothyroidism does not solve weight problems. It's totally advisable to be treated, though, if you are hypothyroid (not being treated can lead to major health issues), but just don't expect it to make it so you can lose weight easily. I'm hypothyroid (diagnosed ten or more years ago) and had my hopes dashed because my (ignorant) doctor told me I'd be "down to a size 6" in no time. Mind you, I knew better--I nearly snorted in her face because (1) I think I was a size 8 in 7th grade for about three minutes, and have NEVER been a size 6; and (2) I'd done research ahead of time so knew this doctor was wrong, but still I got this rush of unrealistic hopes. I will say that being treated for hypothyroidism does make it possible not to keep *gaining* weight, but losing weight is still pretty nearly impossible for me, even though I'm being treated. And from my research, I know I'm not alone, but in fact typical.

Laurie

Carolyn

Hi folks. I posted a while back to say that I was going to begin IE ... the only part that I have started is to eat non-restrictedly and gain 13 lbs. I seemingly can add weight faster, and on less food, than anyone I know. Likely if I were calorie counting I would know why (consuming too many!)... but, perhaps not? A couple of my daughters have suggested that I get my thyroid checked. So, I will ask my doctor about that.

In any case I am back here to this loop today, hoping that simply by posting it will help me to stay committed and on track.

I don't really feel like I now can properly start IE until after the 18th ... because I have no choice, but, to fit into a certain outfit on that day and as it is right now I can barely do up the zipper on the skirt and the buttons on the top.

Even while I was putting on these last 13 lbs, over these past couple weeks, I knew that this occasion was coming up on the 18th and that I would have to wear this outfit that was already tight ... and I MUST get into it. Still I was sabbatoging any efforts and rather than choosing to lose weight I was putting it on.

Finally yesterday I knew I had to stop this crazy-making and so I am trying and for one day have had a successful day of not eating junk! Tonight is a birthday celebration and I pray that I will order wisely from the menu and then on Sunday ... another birthday celebration, and again I hope that I will make wise choices. Choices that will be less about food and more about knowing that if I am doing this for myself for these next 8 days at least that I am treating myself well. Because the less body that I will have to squeeze into my outfit, the better I will feel about myself and thus the kinder I am being to myself.

Thanks for listening.

Carolyn