Re: dream work

October 29, 2010

,I guess you've never had a fully lucid dream that feels the same as being

awake but you totally know that it's a dream? But have you had semi or almost

lucid dreams where you reflect on what's happening in the dream and think about

what you can do to make it better or different?

I've had both kinds of dreams and just in my own experience I had better

results working on issues with the semi lucid ones.The full lucid dreams I've

had were really weird because I knew all of it was my own imagination so I felt

emotionally detached.I have lots of nightmares and in one lucid dream my usual

habit of having nightmares started up: a demon like man came up to me on the

street and threatened me.I knew he wasn't real so I told him, " This is MY dream

and I don't want you in it,so shut the hell up and go away. " I wasn't scared

like I'd be in a regular dream and I also didn't want to ask him why he was

there threatening me because I knew that whatever he said was me having him say

it--it wouldn't have carried any weight as if he was a real person expressing

his own thoughts.He bowed his head and humbly walked away,as I sort of bid him

to do.

The undercurrent of helplessness or feeling that it's impossible to fight

the assumptions of the other person like in your Mexican restaurant dream with

your nada I've had in many of my dreams--I think that you can train yourself to

turn those kinds of dreams into semi lucid ones.I can't speak for everyone of

course but from my own experience I think that if a dream like yours there had

been a fully lucid dream you wouldn't feel emotionally invested in manufacturing

a better outcome (for you) like you would if it was a semi lucid dream.

I used to have these recurring semi lucid dreams that were real

nightmares--my first boyfriend as this demonic figure who pursued me and tried

to either trick me into drinking the contents of these glass vials he had in his

coat pockets or he tried to force me to.He was so insistent I felt like it was

impossible to fight him so I'd try to flee.It was a long,involved series of

dreams I had over a period of at least ten years--every time I had the next

dream,the " boyfriend demon " mentioned something that had happened in the

previous dream,even when they were a year or more apart.*He* was always the one

who decided the dream was over and at the end of every dream he said in this

creepy casual way, " Ah,well,I'll be back.See ya the next time,gotta go. " Then as

he walked off he chuckled to himself in this arrogant yet pathetic voice, " Places

to go,people to see... " I mean,every single time.And I'd wake up with that awful

feeling from a nightmare,thinking: No! I don't want there to be a next time!

I trained myself over time to make those demon nightmares be semi lucid

dreams.I think you could do that with dreams about your nada.From your

description of your dream,the feeling tone sounds similar to my recurring demon

dreams,the being overpowered by the other person's insistence even though you

are resisting it.

What helped me make those dreams semi lucid was allowing myself to feel

that frustrated sort of helplessness after I woke from the dream--and when I

felt that during the actual dream to say no to THAT rather than just tell the

demon no.Like in one dream he tricked me into getting on this funicular type

contraption by backing me into it,then as it began to go down a slope he looked

up and demonically joked, " Oops,look at that.The cable is torn.We're going to

crash.Oh well,it's over now,.There's no way you're going to survive

this time. "

Instead of being terrified/helpless I decided to laugh right back at him.I

laughed like I didn't care and said, " Wow,this is cool.We're hurtling right

down,this is better than a rollercoaster! "

He looked completely deflated/defeated.He looked crest fallen actually.He

said nothing,just stared at his feet as the funicular thing came to a very

gentle halt at the bottom of the slope.When we got off he walked off shoulders

slumping and wearily sighed his usual departing words but without the arrogance.

That was when those dreams became semi lucid dreams.I had more of

them,but from then on they were semi lucid.Eventually I even drank the contents

of the glass vials and they turned out to be harmless.I haven't had those dreams

for a few years now.I think that the " first boyfriend turned demon " was a stand

in for nada because I never dream directly about her (too intense I guess) and

my helplessness in those dreams was how she had made me feel--as these demon

dreams evolved into semi lucid ones where I rejected feeling the helplessness

itself,I also felt much less " possessed " by nada in my waking life.Not magically

liberated by any means but much better able to not feel so much like a puppet on

a string in her presence and much more in tune with how to reject that sense of

helplessness with her when I was awake and she was right there.

So in your nada dream I'd imagine rejecting the helplessness to go

something like: After you told your nada that you didn't want to be there and

you didn't want Mexican food but she insisted on having her way (and expected

you to pay for it--how symbolic is that btw?),you'd say, " Ok,yeah nada,this is

great! Here,have a look at the menu.Oh no,don't even bother yourself with

that--you want Mexican food,great,I'll order you every single thing on the

menu. "

And when nada says, " No,give me that menu,I want to pick out my own meal "

you could start throwing wads of cash at her,pelting her with them and

laughing, " Oh don't worry nada! See,I'm paying for it.See (pelt,pelt) I'm paying

for it.You can have the whole menu.Hell nada while I'm at it since you love this

Mexican restaurant so much,I'll buy the whole frigging restaurant.I'm paying for

it,here,you can have it all,here nada,have the whole restaurant.You can eat here

every single day for the rest of your life! "

Or: " You know what nada now that we're seated here at this table I've

just decided I LOVE Mexican food.I absolutely LOVE it! Oh my my my I'm going to

have this and that and this.I'm paying for it! Right! So I'm going to order this

and this and this and you just go right on ahead and have everything you want.I

love paying for it all just as much as I love Mexican food.Look,here's all my

money,here you can just have it,here take it nada,take it all.Oh nada isn't this

fun? " As you pull bill after bill from your pockets and toss them onto the table

and at nada.

I think if you did something like that in your dream you'd get to see

the wind knocked right out of nada's sails.And you'd see,like I did in my demon

dreams,that nada doesn't really have any voodoo power over you after all.

Best of luck with your dream project I think it's a cool idea.

>

> I'm currently working on remembering my dreams with the goal of lucid dreaming

- being aware while dreaming and acting consciously. Based on the dreams I am

remembering so far, I think if I can do lucid dreaming that I might be able to

work out some significant material with my nada. Be able to have the

confrontations that have never been safe in real life, say what I really need to

say. I am already remembering dreams with her in it that mirror real life

issues so I think this will really be possible. Fingers crossed.

>

> A recent dream involved going with her to a Mexican restaurant. I told her

while waiting for a table I didn't want to be there and didn't want Mexican

food. She kept insisting that way what we were doing, skipping past my words as

if I hadn't even said them. Then she also assumed I was paying for the whole

meal. I objected again and she just brushed it off and said well then don't

order much if you don't like it - while still insisting I was paying for all of

it. Her power of assumption just felt impossible to fight and I finally just

walked off and left her there and the dream went on to something else. I think

if I could have been lucid that I could have said some very cathartic things in

that scenario!

>

> Has anyone else tried combining lucid dreaming and working through issues?

Any tips?

>

> Thanks,

>

October 29, 2010

I'm not sure what lucid dreams are, but I do take dreams seriously. When I have

one that just " feels " more strong (like it's trying to tell me something) I

write down what I remember of it and look up the more important parts on a

couple of dream interpretation websites.

I've always found a more serious message about myself or my life. Sometimes it

gives me peace, sometimes instruction (once you see the real truth, the actions

steps become obvious) sometimes it helps me work through unresolved grief. I've

found it very helpful.

Hope this helps--I think it's a great idea!

Blessings,

Karla