Re: sneaky diet mentality

[Guest guest]

Totally can relate but I haven't reached the first state that you mentioned. I still have a long way to go and a lot of steps to fill in. Sandy

 

Hi, all.

 I thought I had completely ditched the diet mentality but had a small revelation yesterday. I'd been feeling like I'd found attunement with my body at a new level - a relaxed trust that my body will recover from decades of dieting, and with the genius of human physiology, learn to regulate its weight without my having to " try " . All I had to do, I felt, was listen to what it wanted. This was nothing new, but it felt like I'd " gotten it " at a deeper level. In fact, I was getting a little bit high on what a great job of intuitive eating I was doing. Yeah, look at me - I've got this down now! I was savoring every bite, leaving the table satisfied, on top of the world as far as food went.

   Then yesterday I was a little sickish, and a little anxious about some personal stuff, and a little unprepared in my food supply. The result was that I ate something that was not quite what I wanted and I ate just a little bit more than I needed to be satisfied. I didn't think much of it, but then I ate a little too much again at the next meal, even though I ate something tastier. And then for two hours I wrestled with a gigundous craving for ice cream which I finally gave in to - not a binge but definitely a hefty portion with no hunger.

  When I sat down to figure out what was going on, here's what I realized: I'd fallen into diet head without knowing it. I'd slipped into perfectionistic, here-comes-my-bathing-suit-body kind of thinking. I didn't realize it because I was eating when hungry, stopping when full, and my fantasies were still of a pretty large bathing suit, with a sense of patience for however long it might take. But it was diet head nonetheless. And when, for various reasons, I overate just slightly yesterday, I got bummed out and felt like I'd fallen off the IE wagon. I didn't even realize it at the time, and didn't understand why the cravings were just growing and growing. But when I reflected on it for a while it became clear that I was overeating because I felt bad about (what I labeled as) overeating. I was amazed at how subtle and sneaky this diet mentality can be and how silently it can trigger overeating.

   Can anyone else relate to this?

April M.

[Guest guest]

I can definitely relate! As soon as you say, " oh yeah, i always eat when hungry, and stop when full, " you make it into a rule. and to me, a rule = a diet.and i start to rebel.

as long as you give yourself permission to eat for other reasons, in my experience, it stops being an issue. you don't actually have to eat when you are not hungry, you just have to tell yourself that it would be okay if you did do so.

also, thinking about that bathing suit body... even a large on... can imply that there is something wrong with how you look now. and your Inner Wild Child, to quote another IE-style book, can really rebel against the criticism implied there. and she can make you overeat.

so try to stay in the here and now. tell yourself that it would be fine if you put on a bathing suit, right now, and walked out on the beach right now. (i'm not all the way there on this one!) it's not to say that you won't lose weight, it's to tell yourself that you are okay, perfectly so, right here and now. 

hope this helps!abby

 

Totally can relate but I haven't reached the first state that you mentioned. I still have a long way to go and a lot of steps to fill in. Sandy

 

Hi, all.

 I thought I had completely ditched the diet mentality but had a small revelation yesterday. I'd been feeling like I'd found attunement with my body at a new level - a relaxed trust that my body will recover from decades of dieting, and with the genius of human physiology, learn to regulate its weight without my having to " try " . All I had to do, I felt, was listen to what it wanted. This was nothing new, but it felt like I'd " gotten it " at a deeper level. In fact, I was getting a little bit high on what a great job of intuitive eating I was doing. Yeah, look at me - I've got this down now! I was savoring every bite, leaving the table satisfied, on top of the world as far as food went.

   Then yesterday I was a little sickish, and a little anxious about some personal stuff, and a little unprepared in my food supply. The result was that I ate something that was not quite what I wanted and I ate just a little bit more than I needed to be satisfied. I didn't think much of it, but then I ate a little too much again at the next meal, even though I ate something tastier. And then for two hours I wrestled with a gigundous craving for ice cream which I finally gave in to - not a binge but definitely a hefty portion with no hunger.

  When I sat down to figure out what was going on, here's what I realized: I'd fallen into diet head without knowing it. I'd slipped into perfectionistic, here-comes-my-bathing-suit-body kind of thinking. I didn't realize it because I was eating when hungry, stopping when full, and my fantasies were still of a pretty large bathing suit, with a sense of patience for however long it might take. But it was diet head nonetheless. And when, for various reasons, I overate just slightly yesterday, I got bummed out and felt like I'd fallen off the IE wagon. I didn't even realize it at the time, and didn't understand why the cravings were just growing and growing. But when I reflected on it for a while it became clear that I was overeating because I felt bad about (what I labeled as) overeating. I was amazed at how subtle and sneaky this diet mentality can be and how silently it can trigger overeating.

   Can anyone else relate to this?

April M.

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the suggestions, Abby. I do have to catch myself when I start to think I can do IE "perfectly"! As for the bathing suit ....well....I'm working on it.

April M.

I can definitely relate! As soon as you say, "oh yeah, i always eat when hungry, and stop when full," you make it into a rule. and to me, a rule = a diet.

and i start to rebel.

as long as you give yourself permission to eat for other reasons, in my experience, it stops being an issue. you don't actually have to eat when you are not hungry, you just have to tell yourself that it would be okay if you did do so.

also, thinking about that bathing suit body... even a large on... can imply that there is something wrong with how you look now. and your Inner Wild Child, to quote another IE-style book, can really rebel against the criticism implied there. and she can make you overeat.

so try to stay in the here and now. tell yourself that it would be fine if you put on a bathing suit, right now, and walked out on the beach right now. (i'm not all the way there on this one!) it's not to say that you won't lose weight, it's to tell yourself that you are okay, perfectly so, right here and now.

hope this helps!

abby

Totally can relate but I haven't reached the first state that you mentioned. I still have a long way to go and a lot of steps to fill in. Sandy

Hi, all.

I thought I had completely ditched the diet mentality but had a small revelation yesterday. I'd been feeling like I'd found attunement with my body at a new level - a relaxed trust that my body will recover from decades of dieting, and with the genius of human physiology, learn to regulate its weight without my having to "try". All I had to do, I felt, was listen to what it wanted. This was nothing new, but it felt like I'd "gotten it" at a deeper level. In fact, I was getting a little bit high on what a great job of intuitive eating I was doing. Yeah, look at me - I've got this down now! I was savoring every bite, leaving the table satisfied, on top of the world as far as food went.

Then yesterday I was a little sickish, and a little anxious about some personal stuff, and a little unprepared in my food supply. The result was that I ate something that was not quite what I wanted and I ate just a little bit more than I needed to be satisfied. I didn't think much of it, but then I ate a little too much again at the next meal, even though I ate something tastier. And then for two hours I wrestled with a gigundous craving for ice cream which I finally gave in to - not a binge but definitely a hefty portion with no hunger.

When I sat down to figure out what was going on, here's what I realized: I'd fallen into diet head without knowing it. I'd slipped into perfectionistic, here-comes-my-bathing-suit-body kind of thinking. I didn't realize it because I was eating when hungry, stopping when full, and my fantasies were still of a pretty large bathing suit, with a sense of patience for however long it might take. But it was diet head nonetheless. And when, for various reasons, I overate just slightly yesterday, I got bummed out and felt like I'd fallen off the IE wagon. I didn't even realize it at the time, and didn't understand why the cravings were just growing and growing. But when I reflected on it for a while it became clear that I was overeating because I felt bad about (what I labeled as) overeating. I was amazed at how subtle and sneaky this diet mentality can be and how silently it can trigger overeating.

Can anyone else relate to this?

April M.

[Guest guest]

I can TOTALLY relate! You described the issue beautifully. When I had the

realization that I was doing this as well it helped me to understand that my

issues with my weight and food are deep, sneaky, and insidious. And that has

helped me embrace this journey and be patient, as issues like that will take a

lot of time to notice, understand, and unroot.

- Casey

-- Sent from my iPhone

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Casey.

It's so helpful to be able to share the journey with this community!

April M.

I can TOTALLY relate! You described the issue beautifully. When I had the realization that I was doing this as well it helped me to understand that my issues with my weight and food are deep, sneaky, and insidious. And that has helped me embrace this journey and be patient, as issues like that will take a lot of time to notice, understand, and unroot. - Casey-- Sent from my iPhone------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

this sounds like the IE Waltz to me 2 to the side and then 1 backwards .

.. . When this happens to me, and yes after several years of IE work it does, I

remind myself that 1) so many years of diet type thinking doesn't just POOF!

disappear 2) holding up the IE Principles as 'the gospel' can be another form of

diet & 3) it took me many years to get into this frame of mind and habits, it

will take me time to reverse that too.

Pat yourself on the back for not beating yourself up over this as well as being

able to take a step back and see what REALLY was going on with you. That is

progress, maybe even more than 'perfect' not overeating.

Best to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Hi, all.

> I thought I had completely ditched the diet mentality but had a small

> revelation yesterday. I'd been feeling like I'd found attunement with my body

> at a new level - a relaxed trust that my body will recover from decades of

> dieting, and with the genius of human physiology, learn to regulate its

> weight without my having to " try " . All I had to do, I felt, was listen to

what

> it wanted. This was nothing new, but it felt like I'd " gotten it " at a

> deeper level. In fact, I was getting a little bit high on what a great job of

> intuitive eating I was doing. Yeah, look at me - I've got this down now! I

> was savoring every bite, leaving the table satisfied, on top of the world as

> far as food went.

> Then yesterday I was a little sickish, and a little anxious about some

> personal stuff, and a little unprepared in my food supply. The result was

> that I ate something that was not quite what I wanted and I ate just a

> little bit more than I needed to be satisfied. I didn't think much of it, but

> then I ate a little too much again at the next meal, even though I ate

> something tastier. And then for two hours I wrestled with a gigundous craving

for

> ice cream which I finally gave in to - not a binge but definitely a hefty

> portion with no hunger.

> When I sat down to figure out what was going on, here's what I realized:

> I'd fallen into diet head without knowing it. I'd slipped into

> perfectionistic, here-comes-my-bathing-suit-body kind of thinking. I didn't

realize it

> because I was eating when hungry, stopping when full, and my fantasies

> were still of a pretty large bathing suit, with a sense of patience for

> however long it might take. But it was diet head nonetheless. And when, for

> various reasons, I overate just slightly yesterday, I got bummed out and felt

> like I'd fallen off the IE wagon. I didn't even realize it at the time, and

> didn't understand why the cravings were just growing and growing. But when I

> reflected on it for a while it became clear that I was overeating because

> I felt bad about (what I labeled as) overeating. I was amazed at how subtle

> and sneaky this diet mentality can be and how silently it can trigger

> overeating.

> Can anyone else relate to this?

> April M.

>