Re: How many are they???

[Guest guest]

I don't know, but I have wondered this very thing myself. I don't have a large

circle of friends and yet I know of at least 3 who definitely have it and maybe

a few more. In fact, one of my good friend's daughter even has it, I think. I

feel qualified to diagnose people with it, lol......

My therapist told me that many people have some bpd traits. She tells me she

sees some things even in her husband. Sometimes maybe we see traits and not

full-fledged bpd. I think it's also on a spectrum. I have heard it levels out

once someone turns about 40 too. With my mother, it goes worse, though. As she

got older, her waify/hermit stuff was baaaaad. When she was younger, she was

more a combination of waify/hermit and queen/witch.

How many are they???

I was just talking to a coworker of mine who was almost in tears because of the

very difficult relationship she has with her sister. This coworker told me a few

episodes of a long series that has poisoned all her life. There was no doubt in

my mind that she was describing a seriously BPD person (rages,accusations,

attemped suicides, anger, and manipulation). I comforted her and

sent her a few info and links on BPD. The day after she hugged me and said that

the info helped her tremendously and that she finally found a label and a name

for her very abusive sis' behaviour. This coworker, at age 57 - finally had her

'lightbulb' moment.

Then, today, with a large group of coworkers we were commenting about a collegue

who nobody could work with because he was famous for his 'rages' triggered by

just 'the wrong word' from a collegue, from a secretary, or the 'wrong

situation'.

This lets me wonder: How many BPD are out there? It's incredible the sheer

number of people that have the illness.

It seems to me that the numbers are staggering. Are there any known percentages?

[Guest guest]

According to the NIHM website:

" Among American adults ages 18 and over, an estimated 9.1% have a diagnosable

personality disorder. (Per Lenzenweger, M.F., Lane, M.C., Loranger, A.W.,

Kessler, R.C. (2007). DSM-IV personality disorders in the National Comorbidity

Survey Replication. Biological Psychiatry, 62(6), 553-564.) "

This statistic includes *all* personality disorders, from all three Clusters: A:

" odd or eccentric disorders " , B: " dramatic, emotional, erratic disorders " , and

C: " anxious or fearful disorders " . So... something like one out of every 11

people you meet could be officially diagnosed with a personality disorder.

Their estimate just for bpd is only 1.6% of the population. But if I understand

this correctly, these stats are based on the number of people who actually have

been officially diagnosed.

However, as we have seen here at this Group, most of us have a parent or parents

who are undiagnosed. The ratio here seems to be high. I'm one of the very few

members here whose mother has been officially diagnosed.

Me personally, I think that including the undiagnosed persons with pd would

ratchet up the statistics to closer to 40% of the general population; so, like,

4 out of 10 people you meet would fulfill the criteria for personality disorder

if they were to be officially diagnosed.

I think that's more believable, myself.

-Annie

>

> I was just talking to a coworker of mine who was almost in tears because of

the very difficult relationship she has with her sister. This coworker told me a

few episodes of a long series that has poisoned all her life. There was no doubt

in my mind that she was describing a seriously BPD person (rages,accusations,

attemped suicides, anger, and manipulation). I comforted her and

> sent her a few info and links on BPD. The day after she hugged me and said

that the info helped her tremendously and that she finally found a label and a

name for her very abusive sis' behaviour. This coworker, at age 57 - finally had

her 'lightbulb' moment.

>

> Then, today, with a large group of coworkers we were commenting about a

collegue who nobody could work with because he was famous for his 'rages'

triggered by just 'the wrong word' from a collegue, from a secretary, or the

'wrong situation'.

>

> This lets me wonder: How many BPD are out there? It's incredible the sheer

number of people that have the illness.

>

> It seems to me that the numbers are staggering. Are there any known

percentages?

>

[Guest guest]

What about our tendency to " seek out " people we feel comfortable around - kind

of like the insidiousness of alcoholism or other abuse where the child of the

alcoholic or abuser marries a similar person?

Could we be seeing elevated levels of this around us because we draw these

people to us or unconsciously oriented toward them because it feels more " right "

or " normal " to be around an abusive person?

I'm sure we also see the tendencies in the general population because we have a

heightened awareness.

>

>

> I don't know, but I have wondered this very thing myself. I don't have a

large circle of friends and yet I know of at least 3 who definitely have it and

maybe a few more. In fact, one of my good friend's daughter even has it, I

think. I feel qualified to diagnose people with it, lol......

>

> My therapist told me that many people have some bpd traits. She tells me she

sees some things even in her husband. Sometimes maybe we see traits and not

full-fledged bpd. I think it's also on a spectrum. I have heard it levels out

once someone turns about 40 too. With my mother, it goes worse, though. As she

got older, her waify/hermit stuff was baaaaad. When she was younger, she was

more a combination of waify/hermit and queen/witch.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> How many are they???

>

>

>

>

> I was just talking to a coworker of mine who was almost in tears because of

the very difficult relationship she has with her sister. This coworker told me a

few episodes of a long series that has poisoned all her life. There was no doubt

in my mind that she was describing a seriously BPD person (rages,accusations,

attemped suicides, anger, and manipulation). I comforted her and

> sent her a few info and links on BPD. The day after she hugged me and said

that the info helped her tremendously and that she finally found a label and a

name for her very abusive sis' behaviour. This coworker, at age 57 - finally had

her 'lightbulb' moment.

>

> Then, today, with a large group of coworkers we were commenting about a

collegue who nobody could work with because he was famous for his 'rages'

triggered by just 'the wrong word' from a collegue, from a secretary, or the

'wrong situation'.

>

> This lets me wonder: How many BPD are out there? It's incredible the sheer

number of people that have the illness.

>

> It seems to me that the numbers are staggering. Are there any known

percentages?

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

<<With my mother, it goes worse, though. As she got older, her waify/hermit

stuff was baaaaad. When she was younger, she was more a combination of

waify/hermit and queen/witch.>>

Me, too, . That's totally my mother. Waif Extraordinaire.

>

>

> I don't know, but I have wondered this very thing myself. I don't have a

large circle of friends and yet I know of at least 3 who definitely have it and

maybe a few more. In fact, one of my good friend's daughter even has it, I

think. I feel qualified to diagnose people with it, lol......

>

> My therapist told me that many people have some bpd traits. She tells me she

sees some things even in her husband. Sometimes maybe we see traits and not

full-fledged bpd. I think it's also on a spectrum. I have heard it levels out

once someone turns about 40 too. With my mother, it goes worse, though. As she

got older, her waify/hermit stuff was baaaaad. When she was younger, she was

more a combination of waify/hermit and queen/witch.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> How many are they???

>

>

>

>

> I was just talking to a coworker of mine who was almost in tears because of

the very difficult relationship she has with her sister. This coworker told me a

few episodes of a long series that has poisoned all her life. There was no doubt

in my mind that she was describing a seriously BPD person (rages,accusations,

attemped suicides, anger, and manipulation). I comforted her and

> sent her a few info and links on BPD. The day after she hugged me and said

that the info helped her tremendously and that she finally found a label and a

name for her very abusive sis' behaviour. This coworker, at age 57 - finally had

her 'lightbulb' moment.

>

> Then, today, with a large group of coworkers we were commenting about a

collegue who nobody could work with because he was famous for his 'rages'

triggered by just 'the wrong word' from a collegue, from a secretary, or the

'wrong situation'.

>

> This lets me wonder: How many BPD are out there? It's incredible the sheer

number of people that have the illness.

>

> It seems to me that the numbers are staggering. Are there any known

percentages?

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> <<With my mother, it goes worse, though. As she got older, her waify/hermit

stuff was baaaaad. When she was younger, she was more a combination of

waify/hermit and queen/witch.>>

>

> Me, too, . That's totally my mother. Waif Extraordinaire.

>

>

Me too, Fiona and . Aging has given my nada what she never had before a

socially sanctioned reason (old age, serious health ills) to be the waif and put

pressure like never before and me and her sister. She's milking it. I feel

like a jerk writing that too because she does really suffer with some things,

but she also obviously is using it too. Every now and then she'll sound better

telling me how much she's getting done - I'll say wow, sounds like you are doing

great in happy tones - then she'll switch to waif mode and so ooooh, well I'm

still not doing to good, I still have this and that problem. She can't abide

for me to think she's " just okay " for even a moment. Bah.

[Guest guest]

I was just thinking about this myself. Last week I turned in 10 pages of a

novel I'm writing with two BPD characters in it for my writer's group to read.

This was the first really waify scene with the BPD mom. Now, this is writer's

group--just people there to check things like pacing, grammar, spelling, and

anything else affecting future salability of the story...and what did I hear?

The group leader writes on his copy: " This is classic BPD! " And I'm hearing,

" I work with somebody like this. " " This reminds me of both my parents! " And,

perhaps scariest of all, somebody in the group is going, " I really feel for this

mother, she's been wronged... "

Eeeeeeeeek!!!!

I really didn't expect to get this kind of reaction from this group of folks.

It really does make you wonder!

--.