Other side of the spectrum

[Guest guest]

When I started IE a year and a half ago, I was restricting and had horrible body

image. I made peace with food, learned to shut up the food police, and learned

body respect. I ate whenever I got hungry, when I thought I was hungry, or when

I just wanted to eat.

I have a hard time with stopping when I'm full and I have a hard time feeling

satisfied. Sometimes I have wonderful satisfying meals, but I have such a hard

time with nibbling and munching all day, whenever food is available. I can't

resist food lying around, especially sweets. My husband wanted burgers tonight,

so we went out and I wasn't hungry, but I ordered and ate a sandwich and most of

an order of fries anyway.

I don't hate my body anymore, I don't consider any food off limits, but I still

can't resist the jar of trail mix at work or the container of cookie dough in

the freezer.

I think this is a combination of emotional eating and maybe a chemical addiction

to food because I have such a rough time with sweets and fatty foods.

I'm working on the emotional thing, and I'm (understandably) stressed because

I'm probably moving to South Korea for a year, but I'm not sure what to do about

the chemical thing. I don't have health insurance, but it would probably be

worth a trip to the doctor, but I don't know if she could do anything. I think

I'm leaving in two months and that's not very long to experiment with

medications.

I've heard that sugar and fat can act like drugs on the brain, but I think

trying to limit them in any way would trigger diet tendencies.

I feel so awful right now because I've gone from one extreme to the other and IE

is supposed to help you find balance, so maybe I feel like kind of a failure at

IE even though I know you can really " fail " IE.

I know my body isn't comfortable with me eating like this. I know my hunger and

fullness signals, but from some reason I keep choosing to ignore them.

I shouldn't get down on myself, but I am. I don't know what to do. I feel like I

should be eating intuitively by now, but I know this isn't a linear process, I

have to be patient, bla bla bla.

I know everything I need to do, I just can't or won't seem to do it. I'm really

frustrated and I don't know why.

McKella