re: Enjoying causing emotional pain

[Guest guest]

Charlie,

You got me to thinking.  You said,

....in my opinion the central aspect of both BPD and NPD is the compulsive need

to harm vulnerable victims. ..

 

Definitely ,Yes.  in my experience with 3 BPD's.  Boy they can read who to

select and where you are vulnerable immediately.

But also they can't hold 2 conflicting emotions about someone and so with a

longer history your are more likely painted Black because their outlook is more

on negativity and because there have been more historically conflicting emotions

and with the BPD's emotional dysregulation, it's black or white baby.

 

you also said,

.... so complex is that they need to feel the 'enjoyment' of doing the harm, but

they also need to deny to themselves that they are doing the harm, so they

engage in complex cover-up procedures that I call 'masking...

I feel more that it makes them feel relieved in a happy way.  Their inability to

hold unresolved tension fits into this, in my opinion. It truly is sadistic from

the KO's prespective.

The biggest thought I have is considering just where the eggshells have it

wrong.  There's too much of seemingly not empathetic(how the book states

it) pandering to BPD's that sits wrong with me in the book. Whereas in my

experience its the BPD's superficially expressing, a superficially considerate,

superficial empathetic emotion. 

Eggshells is great ground work and I do need the more recent book but the

reality and whats written still have some gaps that I am slowly feeling my way

to identify.  This disorder isn't solved not even close.

Sue