Re:why cant other people see what I see and understand me

[Guest guest]

People can't see what we see or understand us because they don't get it. The

reason they don't get it is they never had to live through it and can't fathom

what we went through and continue to go through. Unfortunately most of us will

continue to go through this s* * * until the nada's and fada's are dead. Even

then they will continue to haunt us and leave the wounds they have inflicted on

us for years. We will have to heal them ourselves.

Of course you mourn for that which you never had. We all do here.

No, there ARE no 'perfect families out there' and yes all families have issues

but compared to most people BPD's are some of the sickest people on the planet.

My closest friends don't get it either for the most part. I've made two friends

in this group and THEY get it, but Q Public and my close friends who are

otherwise like family to me don't get it at all. Of course it saddens me also

to realize that no one gets it.

My one friend tells me and only recently (even though she has known nada and I

since 1991) that my nada is 'sick' but her response to my wanting to vent or

tell her the latest on nada is " I don't want to hear anything about the sick

bitch " . So much for emotional support! Yet if something happens with her or to

her, she's the first one on the phone to me telling me all about it - be it her

family or her smug, disrespectful, lazy boarder who takes advantage of her big

time.

[Guest guest]

I think because it is so subtle and almost secretive with my nada, that my

brother and father are the only ones who really see it, although some of my

father's family sees it. What drives me and my brother insane is when people say

how wonderful and loving and sweet our nada is and we just want to

scream...because she CAN be all those good things, and she is human after all.

But now we can finally put a name on something we've struggled with all our

lives. I don't think anyone 'gets it' unless they've been there. However, maybe

we all have bits and pieces of emotional/mental hangups...I guess it's when it

actually interferes with one's day to day functioning that makes it an

emotional/mental illness.

>

> People can't see what we see or understand us because they don't get it. The

reason they don't get it is they never had to live through it and can't fathom

what we went through and continue to go through. Unfortunately most of us will

continue to go through this s* * * until the nada's and fada's are dead. Even

then they will continue to haunt us and leave the wounds they have inflicted on

us for years. We will have to heal them ourselves.

>

> Of course you mourn for that which you never had. We all do here.

>

> No, there ARE no 'perfect families out there' and yes all families have issues

but compared to most people BPD's are some of the sickest people on the planet.

>

> My closest friends don't get it either for the most part. I've made two

friends in this group and THEY get it, but Q Public and my close friends

who are otherwise like family to me don't get it at all. Of course it saddens

me also to realize that no one gets it.

>

> My one friend tells me and only recently (even though she has known nada and

I since 1991) that my nada is 'sick' but her response to my wanting to vent or

tell her the latest on nada is " I don't want to hear anything about the sick

bitch " . So much for emotional support! Yet if something happens with her or to

her, she's the first one on the phone to me telling me all about it - be it her

family or her smug, disrespectful, lazy boarder who takes advantage of her big

time.

>

>