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Re: Re: Weird Depression

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I don't think it is weird either. Wanting to be loved by your

parents is natural as is feeling sorrow when something really

points out what you missed out on.

I think having a non-traditional family with extra parents would

help *if* the extra parents didn't also fall into the common

pattern of being dish rags or otherwise fail to protect the

children. I don't see why a plural family wouldn't fall into the

same patterns though. It seems likely to me that the other

adults in the relationship would either be unwilling to have a

member with BPD at all or would fall into the same patterns of

knuckling under that spouses in typical marriages fall into.

Having other normal adults to act as parental figures is a big

help even if they're not in the same household, so having them

in the same household would presumably be even better.

At 07:09 PM 11/03/2010 Sunny wrote:

>Not weird at all!

>

>Isn't it amazing that some people, in a non-traditional family

>life have everything...while others have truly-

>nothing??? I've seen a documentary of a plural marriage, and

>the kids had three mothers with two fathers (polyamory.) These

>kids had loving parents, who really nurtured each child. It was

>interesting, and made me wonder if a plural family would be the

>answer to a nada?? If one parent was BPD or something, would

>the kids be kept intact by the group of sane parents??

>

>Good luck on your project!

--

Katrina

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i too look at people and know how easy they have it...they just get to grow and

live their lives...no drama...just living. breaks my heart to realize what i had

to endure while i was trying to grow up.

amy

Re: Weird Depression

No, I don't think that's weird. I too have felt twinges of wistfulness and

longing when observing or experiencing a normal, mentally healthy family

interacting with each other with love and caring. I think recognizing that we

didn't have this and yearning for it is normal. I used to love to watch TV

shows that depicted family members that seemed to actually love, respect, and

want the best for each other, like the old 1950's TV sitcoms where nobody ever

triggered into rage and screamed hateful, vile names at their spouse and kids,

and the kids were never humiliated or beaten, and later shows like " The Waltons "

and " Little House On The Prairie " where everyone was so kind and loving to each

other. Even the " Addams Family " members, weird as they looked, were kind and

sweet to each other (in the 60's TV show version, at any rate. The films are

different!) I didn't even want to watch the shows where the family members

were hateful and mean to each other, and reality shows where the participants

try to humiliate, degrade, and get rid of each other is too much like my own

foo, and too triggering.

I prefer fantasy.

-Annie

>

> Hello,

>

> This will sound strange. I am working on some homework for school and for

> one essay I am watching sister wives on TLC. This show is about a

> polygamist family. There are 3 wives and they are adding a 4th. I was

> feeling pretty down and thought it was just the amount of school work

> weighing on me. Then, it hit me that I am depressed that these kids have 3

> or 4 loving mothers who are talking and playing with them and I never had my

> one mother.

>

> There is a scene where the soon to be new wife is talking about the decision

> of one of the children to not live a polygamist lifestyle and she says that

> they will love and support the children no matter what they decide. It just

> broke my heart that no matter what I did I never got love and support.

> There are 16 children who all feel loved and my mother only had 2 and could

> not make me feel loved. Weird huh?

>

> --

>

>

> " By definition, madness ends in one of two ways: clarity...or death. "

> -- *Frantic

> Purification*

>

>

>

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>

> Ha ha, I just have to chime in and say big ups to my homeland - the

> sister wives family lives about 3 miles from where I was raised.

>

As for healthy loving families - is that for real? I've never bought it. . .

> feeling hit you at a time you were feeling vulnerable anyway.

>

> I'm sorry you had a crappy moment. But don't feel weird about it.

>

>

>

> >

> > Hello,

> >

> > This will sound strange. I am working on some homework for school and for

> > one essay I am watching sister wives on TLC. This show is about a

> > polygamist family. There are 3 wives and they are adding a 4th. I was

> > feeling pretty down and thought it was just the amount of school work

> > weighing on me. Then, it hit me that I am depressed that these kids have

> 3

> > or 4 loving mothers who are talking and playing with them and I never had

> my

> > one mother.

> >

> > There is a scene where the soon to be new wife is talking about the

> decision

> > of one of the children to not live a polygamist lifestyle and she says

> that

> > they will love and support the children no matter what they decide. It

> just

> > broke my heart that no matter what I did I never got love and support.

> > There are 16 children who all feel loved and my mother only had 2 and

> could

> > not make me feel loved. Weird huh?

> >

> > --

> >

> >

> > " By definition, madness ends in one of two ways: clarity...or death. "

> > -- *Frantic

> > Purification*

> >

> >

> >

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