Re: Just an addendum... a FEW tears now.. my life

[Guest guest]

Debra, you are such a sweet and very compassionate person. I have been

blessed to have met you in this group, to have had you call me when I was so

sick

and in fear of the fires around us and now you continue to lift up my

spirits, in spite of how you might be feeling. You are an amazing woman.

I like you, learned from my mother's example how I didn't want to be as a

mom to my kids. And I am proud of myself for being able to have a closer

relationship with my children and for them to actually care about spending time

with me and being close to me. After all, look at how my daughter and I get

along! Do you think that she would have me living with her and her family and

take care of me, if we didn't have a good relationship.

You are reaping the rewards now, of learning from your own mother's mistakes

and blunders, because you aren't repeating her mistakes with your children.

Love and gentle hugs,

Debi/So. Cal.-54

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[Guest guest]

I've always thought you were a very special, compassionate lady and friend.

But reading about things you've gone through and overcome in your life, just

makes me so proud to know you. You are proof that there doesn't have to be

a cycle of abuse. Dry your tears now, and look to the future.

Jeanne in WI

>I really have to give myself a big hug because in light of all the things I

>have been through, I turned out to be a pretty good person. I grew up to

>love and have compassion. I made some mistakes, but I did finish High

>School... ( I was the only one of my siblings who did)... I went to nursing

>school at age 26 even though my MOM always told me " you will never be

>anything " . ADDING TO THE SURPRISE I graduated nursing school with honors

>and a 3.8 GPA. I never got hooked on street drugs or became an alcoholic,

>had my children in my 30's and love them everyday. I would never dream of

>making them go to a bar to watch me get drunk or make them sit in the car

>and be molested while I was in the bar getting drunk.

> I will tell them everyday how special they are and how they " can do

> ANYTHING they want to as long as they want it bad enough " .... I tell them

> how smart they are and build them up... (not what mom did to me).

> And I never ever met my biological father because my mom did not want me

> to. I grew up without a father and never knowing what a daughter/father

> relationship could mean or be.

>

> Ok, enough of this. Now I am getting tears in my eyes.

>

> You all mean so much to me,

> Thanks for listening,

> love and hugs,

> from a compassionate person,

> Debra Van Ness

[Guest guest]

Hi Debra,

You really do need to give yourself a big hug and I wish we could all join in.

It's amazing what you have done with your life and how you have turned around

your circumstances and made a good life for yourself and your kids. With your

background that's really hard to do. You must have made a real commitment to do

things differently that they were done with you and you stuck to it.

That deserves a lot of good feelings and being proud of yourself. It's those

things that can hold you up when you are feeling down.

Good for you,

Marti

debra van ness wrote:

I really have to give myself a big hug because in light of all the

things I have been through, I turned out to be a pretty good person. I grew up

to love and have compassion. I made some mistakes, but I did finish High

School... ( I was the only one of my siblings who did)... I went to nursing

school at age 26 even though my MOM always told me " you will never be anything " .

ADDING TO THE SURPRISE I graduated nursing school with honors and a 3.8 GPA. I

never got hooked on street drugs or became an alcoholic, had my children in my

30's and love them everyday. I would never dream of making them go to a bar to

watch me get drunk or make them sit in the car and be molested while I was in

the bar getting drunk.

I will tell them everyday how special they are and how they " can do ANYTHING

they want to as long as they want it bad enough " .... I tell them how smart they

are and build them up... (not what mom did to me).

And I never ever met my biological father because my mom did not want me to. I

grew up without a father and never knowing what a daughter/father relationship

could mean or be.

Ok, enough of this. Now I am getting tears in my eyes.

You all mean so much to me,

Thanks for listening,

love and hugs,

from a compassionate person,

Debra Van Ness

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