Re: - Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

[Guest guest]

Theresa, my last husband treated me similarly. He started out acing like he

understood about the fibro and all of its ups and downs and ins and outs of

other problems. Also after all that my daughter had gone through with her

dad's death and then being sexually molested and raped by the man that my late

husband put us in the care of, she came first to me. This also, I thought

that my new husband understood, otherwise I never would have married him. But

within the first year of our marriage, he went from this totally devoted and

understanding guy before we got married, to super jerk after our marriage.

Needless to say that marriage ended in divorce and I haven't cared about men

in that way ever since.

I live with my daughter, , her husband and their children and I am

happy and content with that. This family shares unconditional love and my

daughter and her husband have been together and I have been living with them for

10 years. I couldn't have asked for a better situation. I love my sil like

a son, my daughter and I are best friends and loving and respectful

mother/daughter. The kids give me reason to get up each day, no matter how I

might be

feeling they keep me going. They are so used to having 3 parents, that they

can't imagine their lives any other way.

Theresa, my heart goes out to you and I pray that your situation can change

soon to the better. Unfortunately, all to often, the ones that we think are

supposed to understand us the best, just don't...and it hurts.

Love and gentle hugs,

Debi/So. Cal.-54

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[Guest guest]

Oh my goodness no!!!! Your daughter comes first!!!

I was once sitting with some friends and we were discussing who would we

save first....

The deal was this....

If you all were out swimming and your hubby and son were in the water....who

would you save first?

I said without hesitation...MY SON!!!

Shirley, the lady sitting there with us....said Oh no...My husband....

I sat there floored...and I finally had the voice to ask her why she felt

that way...

She said, well I can always have more kids, but I cant have another Tim

(that was his name).

My jaw, needless to say hit the floor...and then my temper kicked in....

I said there is NO MAN on this earth....nor other person who would EVER come

before MY CHILD! I carried that baby for 9 months...its part of me, my flesh

my soul, my blood....and I got up and walked off....I couldn't breathe, or

think or anything. I was so furious.

Men are a dime a dozen....now I cant complain about my hubby I'm married to

now...he has never given me ONE reason in 9 years of being together to say a

bad thing about men....but the others I was married to....they arent worth a

dime all together. I'm not saying all men are bad, cause they arent. There

are bad bad women out there also....but the love of a child should always

come before a lover.

Just my opinion.

K.

-- - Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I

was reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you

re going to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home

I was gone for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me

a bitch. Then he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been

home my entire vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv

and I refuse to live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living

room where, I had thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it

was where people live. LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and

I told him I wanted to move and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr

old dd wont even live with me because she doesnt like being so far from her

friends. She is staying with my other dd in town most of the time. I told

him that she is my responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to

when she isnt here with me. He blew up and said it was her way of

manipulating me and she justs wants her own way. I told him she comes first

until she is an adult. He said hes tired of being last in my life. I cant

wait until he is recovered from his surgery so I can move. He will be

recovered enough around the time my tax refund is here so that should work

out fine. I just hope I can make it that long. One question.. am I wrong to

put my daughter first? He sure makes it seem like I am a hateful person for

doing just that. Theresa in Tn

Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God.

Painful moments, trust God.

Every moment, thank God

---------------------------------

Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

[Guest guest]

here, men will be BOYS. What was his dad like I wonder? Moving sounds like

the thing to do. My mom left my dad when I was 13 and she took me then dad

withheld my motorcycle that I paid for so that I would have to return to his

house on weekends just to ride it. It was a ploy to get at my mom. Men are

emotionaly imature compared to women and it's a proven fact!!! Leave the JERK as

soon as possible

and live your own life for you and your daughters sake!!!

GOD Bless YOU Theresa ! ! ! . .

.................................................................................\

............................. . . .

To: Fibromyalgia_Support_Group@...:

faithoftheheart58@...: Wed, 2 Jan 2008 02:46:54 -0800Subject: -

Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I was

reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you're going

to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home. I was gone

for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me a bitch. Then

he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been home my entire

vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv and I refuse to

live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living room where, I had

thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it was where people live.

LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and I told him I wanted to move

and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr old dd wont even live with me

because she doesnt like being so far from herfriends. She is staying with my

other dd in town most of the time. I told him that she is my responsibility and

I want to be her mom but its hard to when she isnt here with me. He blew up and

said it was her way of manipulating me and she justs wants her own way. I told

him she comes first until she is an adult. He said hes tired of being last in my

life. I cant wait until he is recovered from his surgery so I can move. He will

be recovered enough around the time my tax refund is here so that should work

out fine. I just hope I can make it that long. One question.. am I wrong to put

my daughter first? He sure makes it seem like I am a hateful person for doing

just that. Theresa in TnHappy moments, praise God. Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God. Painful moments, trust God. Every moment, thank

God---------------------------------Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your

homepage.

[Guest guest]

Theresa, NO mother should ever have to ask if they are wrong for

putting their children first. Your boyfriend just sounds like a spoiled

brat of a man who has to be the center of attention all the time. I

wish you good luck on leaving, although personally, I wouldn't wait on

anything. I'd leave him high and dry no matter how ill he was and let

him take care of himself. But that's just me lol I can be a real bitch

at times.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

lisa n.

[Guest guest]

I dont know what his dad was like. He died when M was 12. He has had a hard life

with more obstacles than anyone should bear and I think it has made him selfish.

I will never understand men but I am glad you arent insulted by my letter. I

know there are some good ones out there. Thanks and God bless you also

Theresa

john honeycutt wrote:

here, men will be BOYS. What was his dad like I wonder? Moving sounds like

the thing to do. My mom left my dad when I was 13 and she took me then dad

withheld my motorcycle that I paid for so that I would have to return to his

house on weekends just to ride it. It was a ploy to get at my mom. Men are

emotionaly imature compared to women and it's a proven fact!!! Leave the JERK as

soon as possible

and live your own life for you and your daughters sake!!!

GOD Bless YOU Theresa ! ! ! . .

.................................................................................\

............................. . . .

To: Fibromyalgia_Support_Group@...:

faithoftheheart58@...: Wed, 2 Jan 2008 02:46:54 -0800Subject: -

Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I was

reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you're going

to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home. I was gone

for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me a bitch. Then

he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been home my entire

vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv and I refuse to

live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living room where, I had

thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it was where people live.

LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and I told him I wanted to move

and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr old dd wont even live with me

because she doesnt like being so far from

herfriends. She is staying with my other dd in town most of the time. I told

him that she is my responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to when

she isnt here with me. He blew up and said it was her way of manipulating me and

she justs wants her own way. I told him she comes first until she is an adult.

He said hes tired of being last in my life. I cant wait until he is recovered

from his surgery so I can move. He will be recovered enough around the time my

tax refund is here so that should work out fine. I just hope I can make it that

long. One question.. am I wrong to put my daughter first? He sure makes it seem

like I am a hateful person for doing just that. Theresa in TnHappy moments,

praise God. Difficult moments, seek God. Quiet moments, worship God. Painful

moments, trust God. Every moment, thank

God---------------------------------Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your

homepage.

[Guest guest]

Thank you Marti for yours everyone elses support. I am putting my daughter first

of course and he will have to get over it. It's very hard leaving someone I have

been with for 7 yrs minus the 1 1/2 yrs when I moved out before. But I have to

be strong and firm on this because I know in my heart its what I have to do.

Plus I am dying to be independent again and do what I want when I want. I am

also tired of being in a relationship. I am taking a long break from men. I plan

to wait until my dd graduates before dating again. Theresa in Tn

Marti Boguski wrote: Dear Theresa,

In my opinion, you should definitely put your daughter first. He should

understand this. She is your child and is a minor. It is your responsibility to

take care of her and she needs a mother. I think you need to do whatever it

takes to be with her.

I'm sorry this situation is so hard on you. It is not a good one.

I support what you are planning to do completely.

Take care of yourself,

Marti

Theresa T wrote:

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I was

reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you're going

to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home. I was gone

for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me a bitch. Then

he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been home my entire

vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv and I refuse to

live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living room where, I had

thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it was where people live.

LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and I told him I wanted to move

and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr old dd wont even live with me

because she doesnt like being so far from

her

friends. She is staying with my other dd in town most of the time. I told him

that she is my responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to when she

isnt here with me. He blew up and said it was her way of manipulating me and she

justs wants her own way. I told him she comes first until she is an adult. He

said hes tired of being last in my life. I cant wait until he is recovered from

his surgery so I can move. He will be recovered enough around the time my tax

refund is here so that should work out fine. I just hope I can make it that

long. One question.. am I wrong to put my daughter first? He sure makes it seem

like I am a hateful person for doing just that. Theresa in Tn

Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God.

Painful moments, trust God.

Every moment, thank God

---------------------------------

Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

[Guest guest]

Ha ! I have an answer for TIM " learn to swim " .

It's true my husband wanted me to put my kids in care, I refused and he left,

my answer in court because he sued me, (well in foster care you don't have to

pay child support), I testified on the " chose " question. My answer :- he's a

grown up he can take care of himself, my kids have me and no one else.

As the president wrote THE BUCK STOPS HERE.

Bonnie

PS the judge gave me an 83/17% win (she was a women)

- Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I

was reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you

re going to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home

I was gone for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me

a bitch. Then he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been

home my entire vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv

and I refuse to live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living

room where, I had thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it

was where people live. LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and

I told him I wanted to move and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr

old dd wont even live with me because she doesnt like being so far from her

friends. She is staying with my other dd in town most of the time. I told

him that she is my responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to

when she isnt here with me. He blew up and said it was her way of

manipulating me and she justs wants her own way. I told him she comes first

until she is an adult. He said hes tired of being last in my life. I cant

wait until he is recovered from his surgery so I can move. He will be

recovered enough around the time my tax refund is here so that should work

out fine. I just hope I can make it that long.. One question.. am I wrong to

put my daughter first? He sure makes it seem like I am a hateful person for

doing just that. Theresa in Tn

Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God.

Painful moments, trust God.

Every moment, thank God

---------------------------------

Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

[Guest guest]

I agree.... Children are just that, children....and grownups, well they can

fend for themselves. A child can only help themselves so much...

Great for you!!!

K.

-- Re: - Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Ha ! I have an answer for TIM " learn to swim " .

It's true my husband wanted me to put my kids in care, I refused and he left

my answer in court because he sued me, (well in foster care you don't have

to

pay child support), I testified on the " chose " question. My answer :- he's a

grown up he can take care of himself, my kids have me and no one else.

As the president wrote THE BUCK STOPS HERE.

Bonnie

PS the judge gave me an 83/17% win (she was a women)

- Men underfoot-sorry venting-Update

Yesterday was awful! " M " gets mad if I am on the computer. He gets mad if I

watch " stupid " Lifetime movies. So I decided to spend my day, my last one on

vacation, reading a book. He kept walking through the living room where I

was reading, then after about 4 times doing this, he said " Is that all you

re going to do today? I slammed the book down and went to my daughters' home

I was gone for 6 hours. I went home last night around 7:00 and he called me

a bitch. Then he told he me doesnt get any attention from me. I have been

home my entire vacation,11 days. He likes to sit in the bedroom watching tv

and I refuse to live in the bedroom. He wont spend any time in the living

room where, I had thought was why they call it a living room. I thought it

was where people live. LOL Silly me! Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and

I told him I wanted to move and he wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr

old dd wont even live with me because she doesnt like being so far from her

friends. She is staying with my other dd in town most of the time. I told

him that she is my responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to

when she isnt here with me. He blew up and said it was her way of

manipulating me and she justs wants her own way. I told him she comes first

until she is an adult. He said hes tired of being last in my life. I cant

wait until he is recovered from his surgery so I can move. He will be

recovered enough around the time my tax refund is here so that should work

out fine. I just hope I can make it that long.. One question.. am I wrong to

put my daughter first? He sure makes it seem like I am a hateful person for

doing just that. Theresa in Tn

Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God.

Painful moments, trust God.

Every moment, thank God

---------------------------------

Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

[Guest guest]

You know you're not wrong, Theresa. You're right about all of it. He needs

to grow up and be responsible for himself. He's manipulating you. Hoping

your tax refund comes quick! Do you do the electronic filing? It's much

faster.

Jeanne in WI

Anyway we got talking or " yelling " and I told him I wanted to move and he

wanted to know why. I said that my 16 yr old dd wont even live with me

because she doesnt like being so far from her friends. She is staying with

my other dd in town most of the time. I told him that she is my

responsibility and I want to be her mom but its hard to when she isnt here

with me. He blew up and said it was her way of manipulating me and she justs

wants her own way. I told him she comes first until she is an adult. He said

hes tired of being last in my life. I cant wait until he is recovered from

his surgery so I can move. He will be recovered enough around the time my

tax refund is here so that should work out fine. I just hope I can make it

that long. One question.. am I wrong to put my daughter first? He sure makes

it seem like I am a hateful person for doing just that. Theresa in Tn

[Guest guest]

If he's able to move around the house enough to grumble at you being in the

living room just reading, isn't he able to care for himself after this

surgery? I mean, if you don't want to share the deets, that's fine, but he

is going to have to manage on his own now that you're back at work. Or is

it because he is financially dependent on you right now?

Jeanne in WI