Addiction

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 1/30/00 11:25:47 PM Eastern Standard Time,

RMcmur3194@... writes:

<< .i have only gone back to alcohol because it gives me a

reason to socialize >>

geat rationalization for drinking Reid, I socialize without drinking, had

dinner last week with a group of 20 or so...if I was not on Flagyl, I still

would not have had any alcohol.

if you feel the need to drink to " cope " , or escape...so be it...but be

truthful with yourself that you drink because you choose to....not because

you need an excuse to drink....

Bernadette

[Guest guest]

yes i know what u are saying rationaixzation.......i realize that....i also

realize that i can no longer continue to stay in one room zonked on

prescribed pain pills.....is that a cop out probably.....but right now it

works for me......persocets did nothing but make me a mad man.....and totally

ruined my quality of life......so yes i may be living a cop out.....i am now

doing what i can to survive....it has come to that survival.....hopefully a

return to abx shortly (with no booze) will improve the quality of my

life.....but it will probably not happen for another couple of months

Reid

[Guest guest]

Sweet Jesus Cheryl,

Thank goodness there are two normal people in your grandaughters life. That

is just overwhelming. Call me a rotten person, but sometimes I wonder why

my sweet Elyse must have this nasty disease and why it isn't people like

that. Mysterious...forgive my thoughts but had to say it " outloud "

[ ] addiction

> Jerry,

> Have we thought of gaining custody? Yeah, we went that route recently.

> was deep into relapse and was going to up and move to Boise with

> no job or means of support--the worse part was that she was going to

> take Jasie. We told her no. She went balistic. We kicked her out. We

> contacted the father (alcoholic, drug user--denial) and asked him to let

> us have guardianship and he could still have visitation etc. He is

> married now--got another girl pregnant. His new wife wants nothing to do

> with Jasie (we've heard this from her and him). So he agreed. We

> filed--two days later he was sueing for custody. A few thousand dollars

> later, we withdrew our petition and have been trying to help

> straighten up. It is very difficult to get a child away from its parents

> barring out and out abuse. He doesn't pay child support regularly (even

> though his wages are garnished); he doesn't take his visitations

> regularly; and he's got all kinds of criminal violations. The judge

> ordered them to mediation and a court appointed guardian ad litem has

> recommended that Jasie stay with , but that not be allowed

> to leave the area. We have spent a fortune on attorneys. And they all

> say the same thing. Taking custody from parents is extremely difficult.

> was almost born addicted. As a very young girl she would huff

> gasoline, solvents,etc. She twice had to be brought to the emergency

> room passed out: once at 5 years and again at 14 yrs. She started using

> pot when she was 17. By 18, she was experimenting with anything--but

> liked meth. She smoked pot while she was pregnant, but quit when I told

> the doctor and he threatened to turn her in. She started using again two

> weeks after Jasie was born. Her ex is mostly an alcoholic; he did a fair

> amount of pot. Since he hooked up with his new girlfriend (now wife)

> he's been using meth and other drugs. But he is functional. He goes to

> work everyday and makes pretty good money. went into rehab last

> spring and relapsed almost immediately after she got out. We've been

> afraid of losing Jasie to the father--though he doesn't seem devoted,

> his mother pushes the issue. She's scary. She hit me once. I pressed

> charges. There was a plea agreement and she got a disturbing the peace

> and a restraining order. The whole family is creepy. They are most

> likely involved with the local drug trafficing (it's a small town). But

> pay the right people and get special consideration by certain police and

> judges. They often have scrapes with the law. They own three businesses

> locally: a pawn shop, a sports and marina place, and a faux marble

> business. His father is an alcoholic and has a few illegitimate children

> around town. They have an open marriage (they both cheat on each other).

> These are not the type of people I would normally deal with. I have been

> threatened, verbally abused, had my house broken into, and shoved around

> by them. It has been a nightmare. This guy's half-sister has four kids

> by three different guys, gave up custody of her first child, doesn't

> know who the father of her second one is after testing 6 guys, and they

> had the audacity to call my daughter a slut (and worse). I mean this guy

> was sleeping around while my daughter was pregnant. He met his now wife

> at a party and told us that the reason they got together was because

> they partied well together and was no fun because she was sick

> all the time. He didn't see why they both had to suffer. I could go on

> forever. But it's not good for me. I've already said too much. Forgive

> me. Anyway, until he literally cooks his own goose, we need to rely on

> prayer. We will press charges though if he breaks the law. We currently

> have six complaints on file at the sherif's dept. for him driving on a

> suspended license. They will be served as soon as the mediation is

> finished. Sorry you asked, huh? I try not to blame my daughter. I know

> it's a disease. Bless her heart and soul. LOL Cheryl ID

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

All,

Marsha's letter and others about fear of addiction leads me to post.

I am a 19 year survivor of this DD, and for the first 17 years went through hell

with pain, unremitting, disabling, overwhelming pain. For 15 years I virtually

lived on Vicodin, but it would

barely touch the pain. Finally I found my way to a competent, knowledgeable

Pain Management Doctor. He put me on Lortab and later on Oxycontin.

It enabled me to have a modicum of peace and to think better again. Not very

well, mind you, but at least I was in a peaceful state and not living hell.

Then 2+ years ago I had a stroke. It affected my left side and it took me

about 6 months to return to normal. The miracle was that after the stroke, the

pain disappeared. For 2 years, until

last fall when I began to have some serious back problems, I didn't have to take

so much as an asprin.

As Jane Brody noted, in her recent New York Times article, there is a difference

between psychological addiction and physical addiction. When the pain was gone,

I didn't want any pain meds. I

resent it now when I have to take one for my back because it slows me down.

So, if you are in pain, and need the med, use it. If you stop, taper it off,

don't just stop cold turkey. If you need help, there are rehab doctors who can

help with this process.

Just my 2 cents.

Beck

[Guest guest]

Dear Beck,

You point of view is interesting.

Several years ago I was in a serious accident, and I was on all kinds of

pain killers, starting with a morphine drip. I tapered off without any

problems.

Through the years I've taken medication for headaches and was having

trouble with the toxicity of the pain medication. In other words,

sometimes I'd get so sick that the medication made me feel worse, yet

I'd go into withdrawals when I stopped.

About a year ago I went into a 3-day detox, trying to get off my

headache pills. I was taking vicoden, fiorinal, and one xanax a day. The

three days were terrible, but mostly because I had an excruciating

headache. Everyone there treated me like a drug addict, and I thought I

was one. I stayed off everything for over a year, hoping that the

headaches were rebound in nature and would disappear once I got the

drugs out of my system. My headaches have become more chronic in

addition to some other CFS-type symptoms I've developed. I started the

vicoden again when I had some teeth pulled and noticed that it helped

with the headaches, so I started taking it again. I won't go near the

fiorinal because it definitely causes rebound headaches.

This time I have an open dialogue with my doctor about my fear of

addiction; I'm not taking as much as I was before, and I'm trying not to

increase it, although it's difficult. I take 1 klonopin a day, cut in

half as I said before. The pill cutter you can get from the pharmacy

comes in very handy, FYI. I know from being at detox that one klonopin

can physically addict you. I knew someone who had trouble with klonopin;

she only took one a day but had taken it for years. Also, she was an

alcoholic, so this complicated her situation. (She was a very nice

woman, by the way.) I feel bad taking these drugs, but I'd feel worse

without them. In NA/AA their philosphy is that you will conjure up the

pain if there are drugs in the house. But, for me, I know this isn't true.

I tried going to an NA meeting after detox and I just don't fit. I've

never stolen prescription pads or drugs and don't owe amends (maybe in

other areas of my life). I admit that I'm afraid of pain, so I have some

addictive behavior, but like you, I would gladly throw away everything

if I had no pain or little pain. I know this about myself. Yet, I have

to be careful.

Marsha

[Guest guest]

Very good info, Marsha. FWIW, my doc says that it is the tylenol

in fiorcet or the aspirin in fiorinal that causes the rebound

headaches. Rebound headaches are now a proven syndrome. You can

get butisol sodium by itself, it is the fiorinal without the

aspirin and caffeine. You can also get hycodan, which is vicodin

without the tylenol (acetominophen). Most knowledgable pain docs

will no longer keep someone on long term pain meds with tylenol or

aspirin in them. Tylenol is bad for the liver, esp. if you drink

alcohol. Aspirin in bad for the gut, it can cause bleeding and you

will never even know it.

Mike

snip>>> Through the years I've taken medication for headaches and was

having

> trouble with the toxicity of the pain medication. In other words,

> sometimes I'd get so sick that the medication made me feel worse,

yet

> I'd go into withdrawals when I stopped.

>

> About a year ago I went into a 3-day detox, trying to get off my

> headache pills. I was taking vicoden, fiorinal, and one xanax a

day. The

> three days were terrible, but mostly because I had an excruciating

> headache. Everyone there treated me like a drug addict, and I

thought I

> was one. I stayed off everything for over a year, hoping that the

> headaches were rebound in nature and would disappear once I got the

> drugs out of my system. My headaches have become more chronic in

> addition to some other CFS-type symptoms I've developed. I started

the

> vicoden again when I had some teeth pulled and noticed that it

helped

> with the headaches, so I started taking it again. I won't go near

the

> fiorinal because it definitely causes rebound headaches.>>>snip>>>

[Guest guest]

Mike,

>>You can also get hycodan, which is vicodin without the tylenol

(acetominophen). <<

This is very good to know. Actually, during the year that I was off

drugs, I got back on Bufferin, so it wasn't a true test, but I had to do

something. If I could just take the hycodan, this could be very helpful.

I have a very open-minded doctor. I'll ask him. Tylenol by itself has

never helped me anyway, so why take it.

Thanks so much :-)

Marsha

[Guest guest]

hi,

the toxicity story you told is so familar to me, in partiuclar getting sick from

the vicidone was as bad

as the reason I began taking it in the first place. what an evil illness. I

take methadone now.

EML

Re: Addiction

Very good info, Marsha. FWIW, my doc says that it is the tylenol

in fiorcet or the aspirin in fiorinal that causes the rebound

headaches. Rebound headaches are now a proven syndrome. You can

get butisol sodium by itself, it is the fiorinal without the

aspirin and caffeine. You can also get hycodan, which is vicodin

without the tylenol (acetominophen). Most knowledgable pain docs

will no longer keep someone on long term pain meds with tylenol or

aspirin in them. Tylenol is bad for the liver, esp. if you drink

alcohol. Aspirin in bad for the gut, it can cause bleeding and you

will never even know it.

Mike

snip>>> Through the years I've taken medication for headaches and was

having

> trouble with the toxicity of the pain medication. In other words,

> sometimes I'd get so sick that the medication made me feel worse,

yet

> I'd go into withdrawals when I stopped.

>

> About a year ago I went into a 3-day detox, trying to get off my

> headache pills. I was taking vicoden, fiorinal, and one xanax a

day. The

> three days were terrible, but mostly because I had an excruciating

> headache. Everyone there treated me like a drug addict, and I

thought I

> was one. I stayed off everything for over a year, hoping that the

> headaches were rebound in nature and would disappear once I got the

> drugs out of my system. My headaches have become more chronic in

> addition to some other CFS-type symptoms I've developed. I started

the

> vicoden again when I had some teeth pulled and noticed that it

helped

> with the headaches, so I started taking it again. I won't go near

the

> fiorinal because it definitely causes rebound headaches.>>>snip>>>

[Guest guest]

EML,

>>the toxicity story you told is so familar to me, in partiuclar

getting sick from the vicidone was as bad<<

I don't seem to have the toxicity problem with vicodin if I'm not taking

anything else. I think the fiorinal was worse. At least, taking both led

me to a bad place.

I've heard that methadone can really help pain, but it is supposed to be

extremely addictive, according to the doctor at detox. I hope when the

time comes that you can get off it, you will be kind to yourself and get

lots of support. Meanwhile, if it is helping you, and you're not getting

that toxicity problem, that's terrific.

Marsha

[Guest guest]

My preference is to use O1 O2 or P3 P4. I also like Pete's idea of training

just at P4 but have not tried it accept once on myself.

Kathy

Original message attached.

Pete:

What is your preferred

method of doing Alpha/Theta in terms of software and setup?

Mark

RE: PTSD

The approach I have

found most useful is:

1. assess

the client and brain (since PTSD is a pretty broad category)

2. train

the items which seem most basic and which empirically have the best

effect

3. finish

the training with alpha/theta after the client has stabilized.

Pete

VanDeusen

Practical Brain

Training.

305/251-0337

pvdadp@...

PTSD

Does anyone have an approach they find has worked well

in treating PTSD?

Thanks!

Lynn

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[Guest guest]

This issue came up at the stills convention. A sudden request for a lecture

topic that I was not quite prepared for, but muddled through. Anyway, I see

your point in wanting to alert the group. Here it goes, LOL. In my

opinion. So many of us with stills are just a tad bit sensitive to any

suggestion of addiction. Now, talking also about myself----We at times feel

sensitive and even defensive to the subject due to past events. Those past

events for one may be different for one than the next, mostly however, I

feel that it is fear. Fear from our past experiences where we encountered

people, doctors, family; etc... that did not understand our pain, gaffed off

the pain we felt, or just simply did not care to look at it. For me and

many others also, it is also just that>>>The fear of addiction, so when

things " are not related cautiously in regards to ones pain, one would become

upset/defensive. Does anyone have the article I wrote on Pain? When my

computer went Kaput, I lost all addressees, files, etc...Maybe now would be

a good time to post that to the group as we do have new members. On a good

note: Pain management is a growing field. Physicians are becoming more

aware of Pain and the management of pain. No longer do most doctors have

the archaic thought in pain management. I feel like I just wrote this to

someone else; I did. LOL. The thing with stills disease is that with

activity, it makes one hurt more----usually requiring some sort of pain

relief during flares or when the disease progresses to the chronic stage,

often constant pain management is required. Unlike RA for example; that

when one exercise, it lubricates the joint and makes it feel better.

However, even those with RA experience a tremendous amount of pain and

especially once that disease progresses. This is a hard concept for some to

understand as the information regarding stills disease and many other

arthritic conditions is just not out there yet regarding how much pain

people actually do experience. Back to pain and addiction. Yes, we all

will get addicted to our pain medication. It really does not matter what

the medication is. Any narcotic is addictive. However, so are meds that

are not narcotics. A person could get addicted to an antibiotic if that

person believed that antibiotic was serving a purpose. Here is the

difference, The antibiotic really isn't helping what the person thinks it is

This is the difference between need for pain medication to relieve pain and

need for medication. If one needs the medication to relieve pain---who

cares if one gets addicted! I used this example in my presentation. A

cancer patient takes pain medication---everyone understands people with

cancer hurt---so, when a patient is dying of cancer, typically by that time,

the pain medication needs are so great that the patient often finds simple

communication difficult. Well, do we take the medication away and allow

someone with cancer to suffer? NO!!! We give the medication and allow the

person some dignity, and comfort. Arthritis is really no different, as the

pain we feel is just that of a cancer patient. I think what sometimes

happens is a person may have the beginnings of any number of forms of

arthritis, that pain is treated with NSAIDS, ASA, or the person if able,

simply waits till the pain goes away. That person then assumes the pain is

not so bad. Like the pain of a minimal sprain. I know, all people have

different pain tolerances so don't ream me on that one. That is just an

example. Anyway, this train of thought gets out into our society, mixed and

entertwined, complicating matters to the point that pain has become

completely misunderstood. Fortunately, Joe public does not understand

intense or chronic pain from disease as Joe public has not experienced that

sort of pain. So, when I say " I am really hurting bad today as the disease

is flared up " that doesn't mean a thing! What can anyone relate that to.

Pain is something that is felt, therefore, only the one feeling it is

affected. Unfortunately, for Joe public, for most people to have a care

regarding this issue, one usually has to either have experienced it

themselves or had a very close family member experience it. This is used to

be what tied up the thought in the medical profession I believe---not only

the lack of education that used to be out there on pain management. If one

needs the medication---simply to ease one's psychological thought of the

need----here lies the problem. There really is no way to not be addicted in

some sense to a pain medication. One has to accept that when faced with

having to go on the medication. However, in the medical community---we do

know the difference between those that need the pain med for relief of pain

and those that need the pain med. What we have to be wary of is sort of what

Tricia was coming close to in her letter to the group. Being responsible to

not only others with the pain medication; but first to ourselves. Most

people I feel can maintain the balance between need for relief of pain and

need. Heck, I am so fearful of it that I described a patient I once had

visit us in the ER and told my doctor that if I ever got like that to admit

me and dry me out! Yes, It is possible for one to become that ER patient,

it can happen---that is the nature of the drug and at times the nature of

the individual. So, all I can really add here is that education regarding

pain medication and awareness does help---self-awareness. Hope this helps.

Love, K

-- Oxycontin/pain meds

Just my two cents on this, all the narcotics are addictive, but when used

properly to treat pain and not to get high you don't have to get addicted.

I have been on percocet for years and I am not addicted. I only take it

when I absolutely need it. Oxycontin has gotten an unfair rap as people are

grinding it up and snorting it and using it as a recreational drug. The

press on this has scared a lot of doctors away from it, leaving a lot of

folks without a good med to use. Talk to the pharmacists and see what they

say. I have spoken to 2 pharmacists on this drug and they say it is the

best for long term chronic pain when used correctly. Thanks for listening.

Lynn

RE: Dennis/pain

Just a friendly warning: be careful if your Dr recommends Oxycontin. It is

highly addictive. I know how most of us need something for pain, but be

sure

not to get a drug that you might be using more than you really need. Just

look at Rush Oxycontin is what landed him in drug rehab!!!!

Just trying to help keep everyone aware to the dangers of some meds.

LJ- in NJ

[Guest guest]

This issue came up at the stills convention. A sudden request for a lecture

topic that I was not quite prepared for, but muddled through. Anyway, I see

your point in wanting to alert the group. Here it goes, LOL. In my

opinion. So many of us with stills are just a tad bit sensitive to any

suggestion of addiction. Now, talking also about myself----We at times feel

sensitive and even defensive to the subject due to past events. Those past

events for one may be different for one than the next, mostly however, I

feel that it is fear. Fear from our past experiences where we encountered

people, doctors, family; etc... that did not understand our pain, gaffed off

the pain we felt, or just simply did not care to look at it. For me and

many others also, it is also just that>>>The fear of addiction, so when

things " are not related cautiously in regards to ones pain, one would become

upset/defensive. Does anyone have the article I wrote on Pain? When my

computer went Kaput, I lost all addressees, files, etc...Maybe now would be

a good time to post that to the group as we do have new members. On a good

note: Pain management is a growing field. Physicians are becoming more

aware of Pain and the management of pain. No longer do most doctors have

the archaic thought in pain management. I feel like I just wrote this to

someone else; I did. LOL. The thing with stills disease is that with

activity, it makes one hurt more----usually requiring some sort of pain

relief during flares or when the disease progresses to the chronic stage,

often constant pain management is required. Unlike RA for example; that

when one exercise, it lubricates the joint and makes it feel better.

However, even those with RA experience a tremendous amount of pain and

especially once that disease progresses. This is a hard concept for some to

understand as the information regarding stills disease and many other

arthritic conditions is just not out there yet regarding how much pain

people actually do experience. Back to pain and addiction. Yes, we all

will get addicted to our pain medication. It really does not matter what

the medication is. Any narcotic is addictive. However, so are meds that

are not narcotics. A person could get addicted to an antibiotic if that

person believed that antibiotic was serving a purpose. Here is the

difference, The antibiotic really isn't helping what the person thinks it is

This is the difference between need for pain medication to relieve pain and

need for medication. If one needs the medication to relieve pain---who

cares if one gets addicted! I used this example in my presentation. A

cancer patient takes pain medication---everyone understands people with

cancer hurt---so, when a patient is dying of cancer, typically by that time,

the pain medication needs are so great that the patient often finds simple

communication difficult. Well, do we take the medication away and allow

someone with cancer to suffer? NO!!! We give the medication and allow the

person some dignity, and comfort. Arthritis is really no different, as the

pain we feel is just that of a cancer patient. I think what sometimes

happens is a person may have the beginnings of any number of forms of

arthritis, that pain is treated with NSAIDS, ASA, or the person if able,

simply waits till the pain goes away. That person then assumes the pain is

not so bad. Like the pain of a minimal sprain. I know, all people have

different pain tolerances so don't ream me on that one. That is just an

example. Anyway, this train of thought gets out into our society, mixed and

entertwined, complicating matters to the point that pain has become

completely misunderstood. Fortunately, Joe public does not understand

intense or chronic pain from disease as Joe public has not experienced that

sort of pain. So, when I say " I am really hurting bad today as the disease

is flared up " that doesn't mean a thing! What can anyone relate that to.

Pain is something that is felt, therefore, only the one feeling it is

affected. Unfortunately, for Joe public, for most people to have a care

regarding this issue, one usually has to either have experienced it

themselves or had a very close family member experience it. This is used to

be what tied up the thought in the medical profession I believe---not only

the lack of education that used to be out there on pain management. If one

needs the medication---simply to ease one's psychological thought of the

need----here lies the problem. There really is no way to not be addicted in

some sense to a pain medication. One has to accept that when faced with

having to go on the medication. However, in the medical community---we do

know the difference between those that need the pain med for relief of pain

and those that need the pain med. What we have to be wary of is sort of what

Tricia was coming close to in her letter to the group. Being responsible to

not only others with the pain medication; but first to ourselves. Most

people I feel can maintain the balance between need for relief of pain and

need. Heck, I am so fearful of it that I described a patient I once had

visit us in the ER and told my doctor that if I ever got like that to admit

me and dry me out! Yes, It is possible for one to become that ER patient,

it can happen---that is the nature of the drug and at times the nature of

the individual. So, all I can really add here is that education regarding

pain medication and awareness does help---self-awareness. Hope this helps.

Love, K

-- Oxycontin/pain meds

Just my two cents on this, all the narcotics are addictive, but when used

properly to treat pain and not to get high you don't have to get addicted.

I have been on percocet for years and I am not addicted. I only take it

when I absolutely need it. Oxycontin has gotten an unfair rap as people are

grinding it up and snorting it and using it as a recreational drug. The

press on this has scared a lot of doctors away from it, leaving a lot of

folks without a good med to use. Talk to the pharmacists and see what they

say. I have spoken to 2 pharmacists on this drug and they say it is the

best for long term chronic pain when used correctly. Thanks for listening.

Lynn

RE: Dennis/pain

Just a friendly warning: be careful if your Dr recommends Oxycontin. It is

highly addictive. I know how most of us need something for pain, but be

sure

not to get a drug that you might be using more than you really need. Just

look at Rush Oxycontin is what landed him in drug rehab!!!!

Just trying to help keep everyone aware to the dangers of some meds.

LJ- in NJ

[Guest guest]

Addiction

Shi-nè is

the treatment for our addiction to thought patterns. If you decide to enter

into this treatment, the first thing you may find is that it can be boring. It

is crucial to understand this: shi-nè can be boring. Shi-nè can be irritating.

It can be frustrating. It can be deadly tedious â€" especially in the initial

stages, and especially if you are an active, intelligent, creative human being. This is because the practice of shi-nè is ‘going without a fix’. The experience

has some slight similarity to the ‘cold turkey’ experienced by heroin addicts

who abjure from injecting. This kind of comparison may sound a little extreme,

but to anyone who has ever entered into the practice with commitment, it will

seem fairly apt as a description of some of the very worst moments â€" especially

in retreat. Thought attachment withdrawal symptoms can be emotionally fraught,

and can make people want to give up almost as soon as they have begun to

practice. But the appalling alternative is to resign oneself to living life as ‘a

thought attachment junky’. From the perspective of natural being, the world of

the ‘thought addict’ is actually much more distressing than the ‘thought

withdrawal process’ of shi-nè. Unlike the dreadful discomfort and distress of

heroin withdrawal symptoms, however, ‘thought attachment withdrawal symptoms’

are a fertile field of self-discovery. Whatever you feel when you practice

shi-nè, is a fundamental expression of how you are.

When you confront

yourself in shi-nè you are brought face to face with underlying insecurity,

fear, loneliness, vulnerability, and bewilderment. These underlying tensions

distort your being whether you practice shi-nè or not. To avoid the practice of

shi-nè is not an answer. In fact, from the Buddhist perspective, no one

actually has much choice in the situation. It is not really so different from

events which might surround the receipt of an electricity bill. The bill can

either be paid, or it can be pushed under the doormat with the pretense that it

never arrived. Pushing bills under the doormat is not an answer â€" one either

pays the bill, or one is disconnected. If you find yourself in the midst of a

battle, then whether you face the enemy or not is

almost not an issue â€" the chances that an arrow or a bullet will find you are

high. However, if you face the ‘enemy’ you can at least gain the measure of the

situation.

To practice

shi-nè is to begin to live your life rather than letting your life ‘live’ you.

To practice shi-nè is to get back into the driver’s seat â€" to open your eyes

and see the world. With our eyes open we realize that we no longer have to play

‘blind man’s buff’ with our emotions.

Clarity

spontaneously arises from the discovery of openness within the practice of

shi-nè. Loosening one’s white-knuckled grasp on the thought process enables

thought itself to be more intimately experienced. We experience the color,

tone and texture of thought.

These

qualities arise because we develop sufficient experience of openness in which

to see thought in a spatial context. We become transparent to ourselves. Motivation becomes simpler. A natural compassion

arises â€" a compassion which does not need to be forced or fabricated. The first real taste of freedom.

â€"from the book

Roaring Silence