Re: Stupid thing someone said

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/20/02 8:28:33 PM Eastern Standard Time,

jorghahaq@... writes:

> What in the hell is that?

Denial? Been there done that

[Guest guest]

I'm going to be my aspie self here and answer your question as best I can,

instead of merely co-miserating. I am from Mars.

Sometimes kids will be dx'd weirdly, like, " PDD-NOS with autistic

tendancies " or I think I have also seen " NVLD with autistic traits. " Why

they can't just say " autism " I do not know. Sometimes it seems

professionals think they will spare us something by not using " the A word. "

Other times it may be money-related -- the state will have to pay x amount

for a child with autism, but only y amount for some other dx that means the

same thing. Sad but true.

My reading on hyperlexia today reveals some parents are adamant that their

children ARE NOT AUTISTIC although hyperlexia is considered on the spectrum.

I can understand this if hyperlexia is truly the only issue affecting the

child. Some kids really do warrant a PDD-NOS dx and not an autism dx.

Likewise I'm sure some kids are only hyperlexic, and for those children,

autism programs probably would not be the best education for them, because

their issues are just not the same.

Or like said...could be plain old denial...or ignorance...

Bizarre, yes. (There, I co-miserated.

-Sara.

[Guest guest]

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk and

blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said that he had

problems that were related to autism that it was part of the autistic

specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

Autism?

Perhaps she meant some other PDD? Fragile X? PDD-NOS? Maybe she didn't

really understand how these things are related?

Salli

[Guest guest]

and she said that he had problems that were related to autism that it was

part of the autistic specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

>

Probably given the PDD-NOS label and clutching it for all she's worth. :-(

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

Thing is she is very accepting of his condition when she talks about it. That

is what is so freaking strange. Because he is considered " high functioning "

does that mean that it isn't *real* autism? Does she have an idiot dr. that

can't explain things? It was all really strange

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

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Re: Stupid thing someone said

In a message dated 12/20/02 8:28:33 PM Eastern Standard Time,

jorghahaq@... writes:

> What in the hell is that?

Denial? Been there done that

[Guest guest]

Probably.

It's still strange

At least to me

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

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Re: Stupid thing someone said

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk and

blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said that he had

problems that were related to autism that it was part of the autistic

specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

Autism?

Perhaps she meant some other PDD? Fragile X? PDD-NOS? Maybe she didn't

really understand how these things are related?

Salli

[Guest guest]

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk

and blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said

that he had problems that were related to autism that it was part of

the autistic specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

Sounds like a guy I work with. His son started having seizures. He's

on seizure meds. There's not physical reason (brain damage etc) for

him to be having seizures. But my co-worker says " Thank goodness it's

just a seizure disorder and not epilepsy. "

WTF????

Tina

[Guest guest]

um, If it looks like a duck aaaaaaannnnnd it walks like a duck, then it's

most certainly a duck.

I wish people could understand it's not a death sentence, and I really wish

doctors were not so afraid of it.

Penny

Stupid thing someone said

Ok first of all I am way behind for various reasons will explain all later

but I would like to tell you about something stupid that was said to me

today. The mind boggles

Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk and blah

blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said that he had

problems that were related to autism that it was part of the autistic

specturm but he wasn't autistic.

What in the hell is that?

Georga Hackworth

[Guest guest]

Let me be the first to say that High-Functioning most definitely IS real

Autism.

Penny

Re: Stupid thing someone said

Thing is she is very accepting of his condition when she talks about it.

That is what is so freaking strange. Because he is considered " high

functioning " does that mean that it isn't *real* autism? Does she have an

idiot dr. that can't explain things? It was all really strange

[Guest guest]

> him to be having seizures. But my co-worker says " Thank goodness it's

> just a seizure disorder and not epilepsy. "

>

> WTF????

When was a newborn he suddenly began screaming for 6 hours every

night. I asked on a parenting list for help, and commented, " Thank God it's

not colic. "

I just didn't know. I guess I thought it wasn't " bad enough " to be colic.

(Because...a 2 week old screaming for 6 hours straight is...normal?)

Oh yes - it was colic.

Nobody on the list told me, either.

-Sara.

[Guest guest]

Ok

People are officially stupid.

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95! Ask me how!

Re: Stupid thing someone said

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk

and blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said

that he had problems that were related to autism that it was part of

the autistic specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

Sounds like a guy I work with. His son started having seizures. He's

on seizure meds. There's not physical reason (brain damage etc) for

him to be having seizures. But my co-worker says " Thank goodness it's

just a seizure disorder and not epilepsy. "

WTF????

Tina

[Guest guest]

Well yea.

I know that

You know that

But for some reason this person doesn't know that

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95! Ask me how!

Re: Stupid thing someone said

Thing is she is very accepting of his condition when she talks about it.

That is what is so freaking strange. Because he is considered " high

functioning " does that mean that it isn't *real* autism? Does she have an

idiot dr. that can't explain things? It was all really strange

[Guest guest]

> > him to be having seizures. But my co-worker says " Thank goodness

it's just a seizure disorder and not epilepsy. "

> >

> > WTF????

>

> When was a newborn he suddenly began screaming for 6 hours

every night. I asked on a parenting list for help, and

commented, " Thank God it's not colic. "

>

> I just didn't know. I guess I thought it wasn't " bad enough " to be

colic. (Because...a 2 week old screaming for 6 hours straight

is...normal?)

>

> Oh yes - it was colic.

>

I understand not knowing. I didn't know what was doing when he

first started having seizures. It looked like breath holding. This

person is in DEFINITE denial. He sees epilepsy as a debilitating

disease that only mentally handicapped people have. His son can't

possibly have that because he's too smart.

What irritated me so much about the situation is that he continues to

have these misconceptions about eplipsy even though I've talked about

quite a bit. I've answered everyone's questions about seizures

and he apparently isn't listening or just can't accept the diagnosis

for his son.

Tina

[Guest guest]

----- Original Message -----

> Let me be the first to say that High-Functioning most definitely IS real

> Autism.

>

> Penny

>

Allow me to second that motion! Literally.

Sue

[Guest guest]

Denial isn't just a river in Egypt ;-)

When my ds was first diagnosed, they gave it those labels like PDDNOS

(which doesn't exist, it was a pathetic attempt to discover a new

disorder), and one woman said to me and confused the h*ll out of me:

a learning disorder. While it is a learning disorder, I thought it

meant he hadn't learned enough or something, and all I had to do was

take him to a library and teach him some stuff. I was like " well, at

least it isn't something serious! " LOL! They should say " autism "

first, then explain it very plainly. They shouldn't ease parents

into it, as it will only prolong and confuse the understanding.

I believe in one very important thing - Tell It Like It Is!

" Not my kid " crosses most of our minds when we are first told. It is

somebody else's kid, not mine. But denial is dangerous as early

intervention is crucial. Accepting it doesn't mean I'm giving up, it

means I know what I am dealing with.

Caroline

> Ok first of all I am way behind for various reasons will explain

all later but I would like to tell you about something stupid that

was said to me today. The mind boggles

>

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk

and blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said

that he had problems that were related to autism that it was part of

the autistic specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

>

> Georga Hackworth

> UBAH Educational Consultant

> Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

> Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95!

Ask me how!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

> Accepting it doesn't mean I'm giving up, it means I know what I am dealing

with.

Caroline <

amen!

" Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr.

[Guest guest]

Am I some sort of freak?

I never went through denial. LOL! I was relieved when I was told because it

ment I wasn't crazy or over-reacting like everyone said I was.

I really wanted to talk to this woman more but the other person that was

standing there was one of those sorts of people who had one child about 9

months old and she has read all these parenting manuals so she is an " expert " .

Her personality is also patroinizing. She decided that she needed to give

advice. I just walked away. If she ever needs me she can find me.

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95! Ask me how!

Re: Stupid thing someone said

Denial isn't just a river in Egypt ;-)

When my ds was first diagnosed, they gave it those labels like PDDNOS

(which doesn't exist, it was a pathetic attempt to discover a new

disorder), and one woman said to me and confused the h*ll out of me:

a learning disorder. While it is a learning disorder, I thought it

meant he hadn't learned enough or something, and all I had to do was

take him to a library and teach him some stuff. I was like " well, at

least it isn't something serious! " LOL! They should say " autism "

first, then explain it very plainly. They shouldn't ease parents

into it, as it will only prolong and confuse the understanding.

I believe in one very important thing - Tell It Like It Is!

" Not my kid " crosses most of our minds when we are first told. It is

somebody else's kid, not mine. But denial is dangerous as early

intervention is crucial. Accepting it doesn't mean I'm giving up, it

means I know what I am dealing with.

Caroline

> Ok first of all I am way behind for various reasons will explain

all later but I would like to tell you about something stupid that

was said to me today. The mind boggles

>

> Today someone was talking and said that her 6 year old didn't talk

and blah blah blah. Asked her what was wrong with him and she said

that he had problems that were related to autism that it was part of

the autistic specturm but he wasn't autistic.

>

> What in the hell is that?

>

> Georga Hackworth

> UBAH Educational Consultant

> Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

> Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95!

Ask me how!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

> Am I some sort of freak?

I never went through denial. LOL! I was relieved when I was told because it

ment I wasn't crazy or over-reacting like everyone said I was. <

hahaha, no, i think that happens quite a lot, actually.

i know that i WAS in denial with kailey at first. she was my first and i had no

one to compare her to but my brother james who also has autism (among other

things), but by the time i realized it really was true, yes i was VERY relieved

to get the dx. in trevor's case, i never went through denial because i almost

expected it to happen.

" Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr.

[Guest guest]

As soon as autism was mentioned to me, I did as much research at the library

as I could on it. However, nothing sounded like , it was all on the

most severe and the stereotypical behaviors. This was not my child. A year

and a half later, we started seeing problems in how he interpreted

questions, and we'd have to re word what we were saying and talked to the

psychologist who first suspected it. She said she still thought he was so

we had him evaluated. Lo and behold.......

We never went through denial of it though.

Sue

[Guest guest]

No, you aren't some sort of freak...you are a special kind of freak...lol

j/j

I never went through denial either....

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Am I some sort of freak?

I never went through denial. LOL! I was relieved when I was told because

it ment I wasn't crazy or over-reacting like everyone said I was.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>>>

Her personality is also patroinizing.

>>>>>>>>>>>

These are the kind of people that get hit the hardest, I think.

Penny

[Guest guest]

>>>>>>>>>>>

Her personality is also patroinizing.

>>>>>>>>>>>

> These are the kind of people that get hit the hardest, I think.

Penny <

well, i think we all know somebody this will happen to someday

" Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr.

[Guest guest]

> Am I some sort of freak?

> I never went through denial. LOL! I was relieved when I was told

because it ment I wasn't crazy or over-reacting like everyone said I

was.

>

If you're a freak then so am I. After asking all 4 pediatricians in

my daughter's clinic and being told that " She'll outgrow it " . It was

SO nice to finally be taken seriously so I could get her into therapy

and start DOING something about it!

Tina

[Guest guest]

> <<they gave it those labels like PDDNOS

> (which doesn't exist, it was a pathetic attempt to discover a new

> disorder),>>

Um . . . I respectfully *disagree* here!

-BJ

[Guest guest]

A special kind of freak?

What kind would that be? LOL!

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95! Ask me how!

RE: Re: Stupid thing someone said

No, you aren't some sort of freak...you are a special kind of freak...lol

j/j

I never went through denial either....

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Am I some sort of freak?

I never went through denial. LOL! I was relieved when I was told because

it ment I wasn't crazy or over-reacting like everyone said I was.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>>>

Her personality is also patroinizing.

>>>>>>>>>>>

These are the kind of people that get hit the hardest, I think.

Penny

[Guest guest]

The patronizing person was the person that she was talking to. ARGH! I am sure

that Jayme is a really nice person and all but she just has one of those

personalities that I can not deal with. I am sorry just because you have one

child and have read every child developemental book on the planet does not make

you a child expert. ARGH!

I was working this book booth (it was a long week) and asked Jayme to

come help us. She brought her 9 month old with her and I am sorry yes this is

the sort of job that you can do with kids in tow and all but he was really in

the way. We didn't have a lot of room and I kept falling over the stroller that

he was in and she was taking the baby and shoving it in peoples faces to get

their attention. It was tacky. One person even gave her that look and walked

off. Anyway at one point the baby was doing what little ones do and was tossing

his toys on the floor to get someone to go get them for him. She started giving

me this lecture on why babies do that and what it means developementally and

blah blah blah.

Like I don't know what normal child development is. I have 7 kids. And you

know it dawned on me that Dalton never did anything like that. Savannah didn't

do it either come to think of it. Sierra and Cheyenne did very little of it. I

wonder if ASD kids just don't do some things like that like how some of them

don't point.

Anyway Ms Patronizing and Ms Denial seemed to get along real well. LOL!

Maybe I am just not the person to deal with someone in denial. I tend to be to

much of an in your face sort of person. You know " Here have a nice dose of

reality and deal with it " . LOL! Maybe Ms Denial needed Ms Patronizing at the

moment. LOL

Georga Hackworth

UBAH Educational Consultant

Enter to win $50 worth of free books at www.ubah.com/F1549

Start your own Usborne Home Business in December for only $59.95! Ask me how!

Re: Re: Stupid thing someone said

>>>>>>>>>>>

Her personality is also patroinizing.

>>>>>>>>>>>

> These are the kind of people that get hit the hardest, I think.

Penny <

well, i think we all know somebody this will happen to someday

" Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr.