Oh Schitt

[Guest guest]

I read this on another forum and just had to share it with you all.

Put down your coffee and cokes, and swallow before your read it.

The Schitt Family Tree

For some time many of us have

wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We

find ourselves at a loss when someone

says, " You don't know Jack Schitt! "

Well, thanks to my geneology efforts,

you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.

Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married

O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc.

They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt.

The deeply religious couple produced

six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt,

Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins

Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her

parents' objections, Deap Schitt married

Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.

After being married 15 years, Jack and

Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later

married Ted Sherlock, and, because her

kids were living with them, she wanted to

keep her previous name. She was then known

as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt,

and they produced a son with a rather

nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.

Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt

and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout

childhood and subsequently married the

Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.

The wedding announcement in the newspaper

announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.

The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg,

Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal

son, left home to tour the world. He recently

returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa

Schitt.

Now when someone says, " You don't know Jack Schitt, "

you can correct them.