Re: Zimmi Good for U!!!

[Guest guest]

Just wanted to tell U I liked your cheer. I to feel we can't think, worry or

wonder, what is going to happen in the next 5 yrs. I do also share some of your

goals, Get to a point to be able to work again, as that was my passion believe

it or not, I loved working my jobs, I had done private duty care for the past

several yrs. So for me now needing sometimes my own caregiver to come over and

help me out, is not easy, I was always to Independent. But like you I also have

decided to attack this Fibromyalgia with taking care of myself more, I did not

haave to lose weight, but did have to step up my exercise, walking was no longer

the answer, and became quite painfull so had to give up most of it, but had to

learn streches, low impact things instead. I also had to force myself to take

time for me!, I always threw myself into working more, wild housecleaning or

some other vigorious task, as I would and still do get mad at the Pain. I was

told over and over once diagnoised

with Fibro I needed to make some adjustments, and my Dr's new this was not

going to be easy for me because I tend to be high strung and always went went

went. Well I also had a few surgeries which I was warned by Rhumo, that the

disease would react it feeds off of this, and it did and has not let go yet. I

have been lucky that I have not felt depression, except maybe slight now and

then not for long though, I just get so darn discouraged, mad and have days that

anything sets of a few tears because the pain has gone on and on dispite taking

the pain meds which I was warned also they will stop working and then would have

to find somethig else if I don't go into a remission. But for many reasons

there should be Hope for all of us, because we need to remember there is hope

that everyday we have family who need us around, and there is hope that we are

not dealt a worse disease that takes our life way before we are ready, and there

is hope that we have this site who

understand us, and know our problems are real. Please to all of those who are

looking past today, take one day, I am the biggest worrier, and believe me I

have asked how long can this go on, but do know I know like u said, that we do

get days off and that is what we need to look forward to and just keep a open

line to positive people like I have found here, and helps my day go by fast,

because tomml may be the day that I feel better, and can take control of my

independence again. No one should worry what will happen in the future with

these diseases there are things that help with releif if not for the body pain

the mind pain.. Take care Sharon

Marti Boguski wrote: Hi ,

That was a good post.

I really like the part about looking at what is going on today rather than

worrying about a 5 year plan. No one knows what is going to happen in the next 5

years, with Fibromyalgia or anything else.

I'm concentrating right now on getting through today, with another doctor's appt

that I will take myself too (this is new to me, back to driving myself around).

Other than that I will try to do something in the kitchen today to declutter a

little. It I can get both of those things done I will be content.

Next I'm concentrating on getting everything I can ready to start chemo next

week. I will have someone staying here with me for 3 nights, either my daughter

or my cousin, and the bedroom for them is a mess. I hope to be able to

straighten it out some, but I'll do what I can and they will be OK with whatever

I cannot do.

Next is enduring the chemo for three days and the aftermath.

But the best thing is the weekend after that when my grandson Jack 6 (or sons if

the 3 year old Brady will come) comes to stay for 3 nights. So I'm planning what

to have in the house to eat for them and what we will do. We play a lot of games

and read books and watch movies, and do quiet things. My cousin will take him to

play with 6 for a while each day so I will get a chance to rest. I love

for him to come.

So my hope is just that I can get through something a minute at a time and make

it through so I can enjoy what's on the other side.

I try not to think about Fibromyalgia anymore than absolutely necessary because

thinking about it doesn't make it any better. I just deal with what comes as

well as I can at the moment.

Thanks for the post,

Marti

Zimmy wrote:

Melody,

I'm confused. Your experience is your own. Other people's

experience is their own. Why on earth would your hope, or

hopelessness, depend on the experience of others, whether or not a

majority? Why would you lose hope because someone else is worse now

than five years ago?

I'm sitting at the computer right now and my arms are going numb.

I'm not in terrible pain today, wasn't yesterday. Wednesday, I was.

That's *my* pain, and *my* experience. Not yours, not anybody else's.

Last summer, after my fourth major surgery in less than 2 years, I

was in a period constant flare and was getting pretty desperate. Now

I'm not in a period of constant flare. I have bad days, and not so

bad days, and some pretty darned good ones. My physical condition is

*so* much better than it was a few years ago, because I've taken

major steps to try to fix it. The fibro pain, when it comes, is just

as bad as it was in 1962. I seem to come back from flares more

quickly than I did several years ago.

In 2004, I was in terrible pain from degenerated knees, was super

morbidly obese, and suffering constant fibro pain. When I looked

ahead, all I could see was more of the same, and like you, I lost

hope. I looked around and found some. I worked very hard, had to

make some hard changes to my life, and things got better. The fibro

pain is still there, but other things are better. When I was such a

complete physical disaster, the weight of the fibro was much

heavier. Now that I'm in better physical condition, the fibro flares

are still as bad, but the times in between are better, which seem to

make the bad times more bearable, because I can see past the pain to

where it will let up.

I don't know what will happen in the next five years. I'd like to go

back to work. I also know that if and when I go back to work, the

intense work I've been doing on my physical condition will take a

back seat. That could lead to all kinds of bad problems. I could

also get hit by a truck or develop a disease. In the end, hopefully

not for about 30 years, I will die. Nobody gets out of this life alive.

Between you and me and the fencepost, I'd personally rather dwell on

the company I'm having on Sunday and what I have to do to get ready

for that, and my garden path that I'm making that I need to finish,

and what I want to eat for the next week. Not whether my fibro will

be better or worse in five years.

You have subscribed to a religious philosophy based on hope. There

are resources in that philosophy that you can latch onto right now.

I suggest that you start looking. Call someone, perhaps a

clergyperson, who might be able to give you comfort and some

references for hope. Use what you can from this group and don't get

bogged down in other people's bad experiences. It's possible to have

empathy and sympathy without taking another person's pain as your

own, or feeling like you have to somehow fix it.

In the immortal words of ette Goddard ( " The Women " , MGM, 1940),

" Chin up, dear - both of them " ;D ;D

Z

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