Ginger

[Guest guest]

Thanks for being there for me. you are so right. the verbal/menatl abuse is so

much worse to deal with. i wish he would hit me again and I could have him

locked up again. then I could kick him out of here with a restraining order.

that would be better I think sometimes. It is impossible to deal with someone

like this. Can't win for losing. I appreciate your kindness. sorry you went

through it too.

Hugs,

kjiny wrote:

Hello ,

I know that I'm new here, but I just had to respond to your post.

I was right were you are 14 yrs ago,except mine was verbal and

physical abuse. I had a 6 yr old son and a 23 month old daughter,but

I finally had had enough and kicked him out.I went through all

the " you'll never see the kids again " , " I'll be watching you

everywhere you go " ,and " If you leave,I'll beat the crap out of you "

that I could take. It just came to a point that I didn't care what he

did, I just couldn't live like that anymore. And you know what? He

NEVER did do anything to me or the kids! Actually, he pretty much

didn't have anything to do with any of us, and that was better than

all the verbal and physical abuse.

To me,verbal abuse is a lot more painful than anything someone

can do to me physically. I can heal physically,but I'm STILL dealing

with the way he treated me verbally - even after all this time.

That's why I've never remarried,because of trust issues. But I've

found that it's a lot better to be by yourself than to be with the

WRONG one! I don't know how true this is,but I've heard that Post

Traumatic Stress Disorder has been linked to Fibro. I know that it

was about 6 months after I'd had my daughter and a total (dating and

married to) of 12 years of dealing with him that I was beginning to

be diagnoised with Fibro and Chronic Fatigue. For me, Stress is one

of the biggest things that throws me into a flare up.

I'm sorry that you are having to go through this. I know how hard

it is. If you would like to talk, feel free to email me anytime.

I'll be sending Hugs and Prayers your way...

Take Care ~ Ginger

>

> Hubby was back to his old tricks again last night. has not spoken

more than " 2 word sentences " to me in days. All because Paypal took

money out of his bank account to satisfy a negative balance due. You

see a few months back he decided to get my paypal account closed, by

telling them I did not have permission to use his debit card , which

was untrue, so the account was closed. When he closed it, it left a

negative balance and they have been after it ever since. He said that

it was not his responsibility to pay it, so they just took it. well

he decided when he saw they money gone from the bank account that I

had made a purchase of some sort. {I wrote him a note explaining what

happened} but he still blames me for the money gone. He started this

mess by closing my account and leaving it with the negative balance.

I use paypal for online purchases. Mostly herbs and vitamins for my

fibro. I am allowed so much per payday. This charge added to what I

already spent this payday.

> well anyhow, he yelled at me in front of Mel, called me names,

would not listen to reason or any explaination. Cut me off from

looking at the bank account, cut off the debit card I use and now I

have to ask for money when I need something and I will recieve cash

only. It is bad enough he closed our joint account last year and I

have had to use his debit card since, but now he has gone too far. He

also took out a 200$ withdrawal of cash out of this paycheck for

something not to do with bills or necessity, but that is ok. this is

all about control, abuse and his anger issues. I am the easy target.

But having a conversation of finger pointing , name calling and

threats of divorce, etc are non-productive. he is a " right-

fighter " ,so I have no chance of winning even if I am right. This time

it left me in tears, shaking and miserable. Oh and he also told me

that my job is the cooking, cleaning, laundry, pet care, etc because

I owe it to him because he supports the house with

> money. I already do this as much as I can, but with fibro I have

my bad days too. TG is here to help me. She is an awesome

daughter. Oh then he tell me How great of a hubby he is because he

does this. yes it is awesome that he support us with money, but the

rest of his bs is too much to deal with. wonders why he gets no

cooperation on our part. Gee I wonder. We receive no love, kindness,

friendship, compassion etc from him. what does he expect? Then he

started in about not having intimate contact in years. Who would want

to? He sleeps in the recliner at night, not in bed. Oh and as far as

my health issues go, I was told that he could care less about it. I

am so over this crap. I really am. It is affecting 's health

and well being as well as my own. I will never beat this flare with

this going on here. I need help. Please pray for us, if you believe

in prayer. We need all we can get. Tysm for listening and as always

feel free to make any suggestions you may

> have.

> Hugs,

>

>

> One of God's arrangements is that after winter there should come

beautiful spring days. It happens every year and it happens in every

life.

> Father ph (Submitted by LotusSong)

>

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