Guest guest Posted August 10, 2010 Report Share Posted August 10, 2010 Hi Josie,I struggle with feeling like IE is another diet also at times, but then I remember that I've been a compulsive eater for a long time and IE is actually re-training myself to eat normally and help with my bad habits. It is also about learning to listen to what my body is saying. I think after a while all this should come automatically and it won't feel like steps in a diet anymore but because I've abused food and developed habits, I have to break them somehow and I guess it's gonna feel a little diety for a bit. All in all, I feel IE is a pleasant experience, especially compared to tracking and restricting everything I eat. Today was not so good though. I put on a pair of my jeans and they were considerably tighter than usual. I haven't weighed myself for a couple months so I'm a little panicky about how much weight I've packed on and now questioning if I've really been stopping when I'm full. It's scary not knowing how much I weigh, but at the same time those numbers really play with my mind. But so do tight jeans! Ugh. I keep telling myself things will even out eventually as long as I eat when hungry, stop when full... but then I wonder now if I'm cheating somehow, like on a diet... since my jeans are getting tighter! lol Boy, I must really be messed up! This too shall pass (I hope)To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, August 10, 2010 9:08:00 PMSubject: Discipline and IE So here is something I'm struggling with tonight. I know that discipline is something we criticize ourselves for not being when we cannot stick to diets, but it seems to me that it also takes discipline to do IE. For example, it takes discipline to stop and figure out if you're hungry, rather than just snarfing down whatever is in front of you. It takes discipline to try to figure out what emotion you're stuffing down by eating. It takes discipline to pause and push the plate away when you've had enough. I feel, this week, like I am having a resistance to really working the IE steps. I came home from work today (and it was a busy day, but not a particularly frustrating day) and found myself eating way more than I should have when I was not at all hungry. Starting with pita chips, then chocolate chip cookies and soda, then some leftover goulash from last night's dinner. Now I am uncomfortably full. And alll the while, I knew I wasn't hungry, that I needed to stop and figure out what it was all about. That if I was just needing a break after a busy day, I should sit down and relax instead of heading straight for the food. But I had zero desire to actually do those things I know I should have done. Today I am feeling just as undisciplined at IE as I've always been on diets. If I can't get myself to work the steps, how will I ever get to where I want to be? How do you make yourself take that pause and figure stuff out when you just don't want to? Josie New post up @ www.artofintuitiveliving.blogspot.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2010 Report Share Posted August 11, 2010 Must be something in the air, Josie and , because I've been having similar thoughts, too. Yesterday I was thinking that I'm just as obsessed about getting IE "right" as I ever was about diets. Then I remembered that, yeah, this is going to take some time. Most of the time I feel really good about this, and a lot of the time I don't think about food at all. But the things we did with food were a simple "solution" to a very complicated set of issues--some deep, some not so deep, and different ones for each of us. So of course it will take some time for each of us to work all this out. I think it's only natural that sometimes we'd slip back into wanting just to "use" food instead of being mindful about it. If we've done it for some time, it will be hard not to let those old habits come back when things are less than optimal. And when are things optimal? I had an eye-opening thing happen at work a week or so ago, when I found myself repeatedly reaching into my food drawer for something to munch on, then realizing that no, I wasn't really hungry, and stopping myself. Then I would find myself reaching there again, and stop myself again. This happened maybe seven or eight times in a row! I wasn't even agitated, just mildly resentful of having to do a mindless task that would take quite a bit of time. And so I was going blank and reaching for food, I guess to compensate myself or something. It was like a knee-jerk reaction, and I was amazed at how entrenched it was. Sometimes I too don't feel like doing the IE work, but it comforts me that I can always, even if I overeat, just wait until I'm hungry the next time, so it's like "resetting" the work right away again. And I like that I don't always need to look deeply into everything; sometimes I can just plain wait things out and take a simpler approach of not eating until I'm hungry and stopping when I'm satisfied, no real thinking necessary. Just do the physical work now, and get to the mental stuff when I feel a little stronger. Some days enough is freaking enough. I don't want to think about me and my food. Those are the days I take a little siesta from the deep work of IE. I suspect that the "you're just fooling yourself" fears you're hearing, , when the jeans feel a little snug is what Geneen Roth calls "The Voice," that judgmental superego kind of thing that talks us out of things that are in our best interests and tries to drag us back to doing what everyone else thinks we should do. Cripes, jeans can be snug because you're retaining a little more water, or because you've taken on muscle mass, which also holds a bit more water. And yes, it can be because maybe you've gained a little. Doesn't mean you're a some kind of lame loser (which is what my Voice tells me!). Thank The Voice for its input and just pat it on the head and tell it to put a sock in it for awhile, you're going to trust yourself for a change. Just take time for yourself, get some sleep, and treat yourself even better tomorrow than you treated yourself today. I find if I indulge in radical self-care, "The Voice" slinks away, and I feel more capable of doing the deeper work if I've had some quality sleep and recreation, even if I "don't have the time" for it. Best, Laurie Discipline and IE So here is something I'm struggling with tonight. I know that discipline is something we criticize ourselves for not being when we cannot stick to diets, but it seems to me that it also takes discipline to do IE. For example, it takes discipline to stop and figure out if you're hungry, rather than just snarfing down whatever is in front of you. It takes discipline to try to figure out what emotion you're stuffing down by eating. It takes discipline to pause and push the plate away when you've had enough. I feel, this week, like I am having a resistance to really working the IE steps. I came home from work today (and it was a busy day, but not a particularly frustrating day) and found myself eating way more than I should have when I was not at all hungry. Starting with pita chips, then chocolate chip cookies and soda, then some leftover goulash from last night's dinner. Now I am uncomfortably full. And alll the while, I knew I wasn't hungry, that I needed to stop and figure out what it was all about. That if I was just needing a break after a busy day, I should sit down and relax instead of heading straight for the food. But I had zero desire to actually do those things I know I should have done. Today I am feeling just as undisciplined at IE as I've always been on diets. If I can't get myself to work the steps, how will I ever get to where I want to be? How do you make yourself take that pause and figure stuff out when you just don't want to? Josie New post up @ www.artofintuitiveliving.blogspot.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2010 Report Share Posted August 11, 2010 Thank-you Laurie. I do have 2 reasons the jeans could be more snug... my ankles are swollen, so obviously I am retaining water... and today is the first day of my period. I also went on a challenging walk/jog yesterday so maybe my muscles are holding water from that. But even knowing that I still have the fear that I'm gaining weight and out of control so maybe you are right about 'The Voice'. I am going to do as you suggested... get some sleep and tomorrow take extra good care of myself and hope these fear thoughts fade away. Thank-you for your always-appreciated insights!To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, August 10, 2010 11:21:37 PMSubject: Re: Discipline and IE Must be something in the air, Josie and , because I've been having similar thoughts, too. Yesterday I was thinking that I'm just as obsessed about getting IE "right" as I ever was about diets. Then I remembered that, yeah, this is going to take some time. Most of the time I feel really good about this, and a lot of the time I don't think about food at all. But the things we did with food were a simple "solution" to a very complicated set of issues--some deep, some not so deep, and different ones for each of us. So of course it will take some time for each of us to work all this out. I think it's only natural that sometimes we'd slip back into wanting just to "use" food instead of being mindful about it. If we've done it for some time, it will be hard not to let those old habits come back when things are less than optimal. And when are things optimal? I had an eye-opening thing happen at work a week or so ago, when I found myself repeatedly reaching into my food drawer for something to munch on, then realizing that no, I wasn't really hungry, and stopping myself. Then I would find myself reaching there again, and stop myself again. This happened maybe seven or eight times in a row! I wasn't even agitated, just mildly resentful of having to do a mindless task that would take quite a bit of time. And so I was going blank and reaching for food, I guess to compensate myself or something. It was like a knee-jerk reaction, and I was amazed at how entrenched it was. Sometimes I too don't feel like doing the IE work, but it comforts me that I can always, even if I overeat, just wait until I'm hungry the next time, so it's like "resetting" the work right away again. And I like that I don't always need to look deeply into everything; sometimes I can just plain wait things out and take a simpler approach of not eating until I'm hungry and stopping when I'm satisfied, no real thinking necessary. Just do the physical work now, and get to the mental stuff when I feel a little stronger. Some days enough is freaking enough. I don't want to think about me and my food. Those are the days I take a little siesta from the deep work of IE. I suspect that the "you're just fooling yourself" fears you're hearing, , when the jeans feel a little snug is what Geneen Roth calls "The Voice," that judgmental superego kind of thing that talks us out of things that are in our best interests and tries to drag us back to doing what everyone else thinks we should do. Cripes, jeans can be snug because you're retaining a little more water, or because you've taken on muscle mass, which also holds a bit more water. And yes, it can be because maybe you've gained a little. Doesn't mean you're a some kind of lame loser (which is what my Voice tells me!). Thank The Voice for its input and just pat it on the head and tell it to put a sock in it for awhile, you're going to trust yourself for a change. Just take time for yourself, get some sleep, and treat yourself even better tomorrow than you treated yourself today. I find if I indulge in radical self-care, "The Voice" slinks away, and I feel more capable of doing the deeper work if I've had some quality sleep and recreation, even if I "don't have the time" for it. Best, Laurie [intuitiveEating_ Support] Discipline and IE So here is something I'm struggling with tonight. I know that discipline is something we criticize ourselves for not being when we cannot stick to diets, but it seems to me that it also takes discipline to do IE. For example, it takes discipline to stop and figure out if you're hungry, rather than just snarfing down whatever is in front of you. It takes discipline to try to figure out what emotion you're stuffing down by eating. It takes discipline to pause and push the plate away when you've had enough. I feel, this week, like I am having a resistance to really working the IE steps. I came home from work today (and it was a busy day, but not a particularly frustrating day) and found myself eating way more than I should have when I was not at all hungry. Starting with pita chips, then chocolate chip cookies and soda, then some leftover goulash from last night's dinner. Now I am uncomfortably full. And alll the while, I knew I wasn't hungry, that I needed to stop and figure out what it was all about. That if I was just needing a break after a busy day, I should sit down and relax instead of heading straight for the food. But I had zero desire to actually do those things I know I should have done. Today I am feeling just as undisciplined at IE as I've always been on diets. If I can't get myself to work the steps, how will I ever get to where I want to be? How do you make yourself take that pause and figure stuff out when you just don't want to? Josie New post up @ www.artofintuitivel iving.blogspot. com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2010 Report Share Posted August 11, 2010 Thanks, Laurie, for sharing your experiences and voice. I too experience the back and forth, gently asking myself if I'm really hungry. That's huge!!! Josie, hugs. Part of the process is the journey...the frustration...all that. , hugs to you too! Jill, thanks for your thanks!!! Hugs all, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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