Re: Newbie

[Guest guest]

Alice,

Hi. My name is Shari and my husband suffers from Chronic pancreatitis

due to alcohol too. He had his first attack in Oct. '98. The DR's told him

then that he needed to quit drinking or he may die. Well, at the time he

only suffered from acute pancreatitis. He was the same as your husband.

He'd agree to quit while suffering and in pain, but then as he got feeling

better, he would tell me he thinks that the drinking wasn't the problem that

it was from the 3 St. 's Wart pills he took because he had heard that you

can get it from that. I have heard over the years every excuse imaginable.

The worse part is that the DR's all tell " ME " to go to Al-Anon. I know what

they are going to tell me there...I am an enabler and that I am only causing

my husband further harm by staying with him. That if I left he may be forced

to quit. So everyone looks at me like it is as much my fault. I tell them

that it is harder to stay than it would be to go. We are financially broke.

My job has great insurance but it is only part time so I am unable to

contribute very much. We are in the process of applying for Disability.

Hope that comes through or I don't know what we will do. How old are your

kids? Ours are 14 and 12. They have become very resentful of their father

over the years. They blame his inability to quit drinking to be the cause of

all our problems. It is very sad. I joined this group to learn more and get

support that I need. You will find that here. Does your husband get on the

computer? Mine is a bit intimidated by it and tends to stay away but I print

postings every now and then for him to read or else I read them to him and he

is getting interested. He is at the point that he knows he has to quit. The

DR's told him a week ago, during an ECRP that since he is still drinking they

can't do surgery to remove a blockage. He said my husband, (Shane), hold all

the keys now. They cannot guarantee that he won't still get worse after he

quits but they can guarantee he will, if he doesn't quit. I get angry,

frustrated and finally after 3 years of this, gave him an ultimatum. I told

him I wouldn't be an enabler any longer and that he has to care enough about

his family and stop being so self centered. I realize that may sound harsh,

but I've given him 3 years of promises and treatment centers, Librium, etc...

He just likes his Gin. I hope he can make it this time.

Sorry to have gone so lengthy with this, but I know exactly what you are

going through. I am here anytime you need to talk. I will pray for your

husband to find the strength to quit for all of your sakes. Hope it helps to

know you are not alone.

God Bless,

Shari in KY

[Guest guest]

Alicem,

I am thinking your name is Alice but don't know for sure... Welcome to

the group I am sorry that your hubby has this disease and that he can't face

that he is only going to get worse with or without alochol, but the drinking

is just going to make the attack that much sooner and worse, I don't know

what I can say to help you make him realize unless he will read the post and

see what we go through and maybe talking to us I am sure the doctors have

told him how important it is to stop and he isn't taking that seriously, I

feel for you.. he needs to talk to someone with the disease so that maybe he

can see that it isn't going away and the only way to have lesser attacks is

to follow what the doctor says... I hope that you can get some support here

from us your road ahead isn't going to be easy...

welcome to the group ... what test have they run on him? what has he had done

so far? just wanted a little info...if you don't mind...

Hugs and Kisses

you are in my thoughts and prayers

love and friendship in Mich.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/23/01 7:42:55 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

alicem11@... writes:

>

I am assuming that this was posted by Alice, and after I say welcome, I must

say that sometimes the hard way to learn is sometimes the best way. I think

your husband is an adult and has had many life experiences to guide his

decisions. I can only add the old saw " That is if it hurts when you do that

.... then don't do that "

And if it takes an experience or a few to make the point, then so be it, best

of luck and please try to have easy days and nights.

Poncho

[Guest guest]

I hope your husband does quit Drinking. Alcohol does not cause all

Pancreatitis but the consumption of alcohol if you have Pancreatitis is

Deadly. I would ask you and your husband to join us in our chat room

tonight. You can find us at http://www.top5plus5.com/ChatRooms-Pancreas.htm

We try to meet nightly at 830EST/530PST. I hope to see you or your husband

there. There isn't much of a choice here for him. He will have to quite

his drinking or end up in a Casket. Sorry to be so blunt, but it is very

important. I won't even drink Cough Medicine if it has alcohol in it.

I hope this finds you and yours well

Mark E. Armstrong

www.top5plus5.com

newbie

> hello i am new here.I am writing because my usband was diagnosed with

> pancreatitis in Jan 2001.he has had a few attacks since then.i am

> worried about him because he does not want to accept the fact that

> alcohol is a major contributer to this disease. he has been a pretty

> heavy drinker for many years. i dont know how to help him. he thinks

> that once the pain is gone he is ok then he reuses to his old

> ways.any advice would be helpful. I do worry and so do our kids.He

> thinks that this condtion that once it heals completely he wont get

> attacks again and he can resume drinking. If i say anything to him

> otherwise he just gets upset at me.But i want him to get better. He

> wont get any kind of professional help.I dont want him to learn the

> hard way either.

> thanks for letting me write this.

>

> PS i do want to say that this condition does affect a relationship as

> well as the family so i think that it is important for people to feel

> comfortable to talk about their problems. one reason is that stress

> and marriage problems can lead to drinking in some people which

> affects this condition.

>

>

>

>

>

> PANCREATITIS SUPPORT NETWORK

> Online e-mail group

>

> To reply to this message hit " reply " or send an e-mail to:

Pancreatitisegroups

>

> To subscribe to this e-mail group, simply send an e-mail to:

Pancreatitis-subscribeegroups

>

>

[Guest guest]

Alice:

Thanks for joining us. We all need help sometimes. I want to give you a

nice big hug as a welcome.

I also wanted to say he will eventually figure out the connection by himself

and that you and the Doc have not been lying to him. In fact, He probably

already knows it, but is afraid to admit it. I have come to have a great

respect for fear. Sometimes, it keeps us walking the same path, even though

we know its bad for us.

I am also having to come to grips with something I sincerely love but have

to do without. Cheeseburgers! I know it sounds stupid, but I love them. I

know they are bad for me and have direct correlating evidence that when I

eat them, I hurt. That hasn't made me stop doing it. But I have cut down

tremendously.

I am not trying to make light of your husband's problem, but he will notice

sooner or later, that there is serious pain involved and it isn't a

hangover. That is a guarantee. I just hope you and he can find an

alternate solution.

Sincerely,

Ken Ross

Beaverton, OR

newbie

hello i am new here.I am writing because my usband was diagnosed with

pancreatitis in Jan 2001.he has had a few attacks since then.i am

worried about him because he does not want to accept the fact that

alcohol is a major contributer to this disease. he has been a pretty

heavy drinker for many years. i dont know how to help him. he thinks

that once the pain is gone he is ok then he reuses to his old

ways.any advice would be helpful. I do worry and so do our kids.He

thinks that this condtion that once it heals completely he wont get

attacks again and he can resume drinking. If i say anything to him

otherwise he just gets upset at me.But i want him to get better. He

wont get any kind of professional help.I dont want him to learn the

hard way either.

thanks for letting me write this.

PS i do want to say that this condition does affect a relationship as

well as the family so i think that it is important for people to feel

comfortable to talk about their problems. one reason is that stress

and marriage problems can lead to drinking in some people which

affects this condition.

PANCREATITIS SUPPORT NETWORK

Online e-mail group

To reply to this message hit " reply " or send an e-mail to:

Pancreatitisegroups

To subscribe to this e-mail group, simply send an e-mail to:

Pancreatitis-subscribeegroups

[Guest guest]

Hi,

welcome to this wonderful support group. Yes, alcohol will continue to

make the condition worse and can lead to chronic pancreatitis. Everytime

he has an attack, it makes him twice more likely to get an attack if he

drinks alcohol or eats fatty foods, etc. Basically once you have

pancreatitis, you become twice more likely to get it from anything that

can cause it regardless of how it first started. I have it from a birth

defect and I can't even cook with alcohol because it will make my

pancreas have a major attack and I never even drank very much.

I know he doesn't want to hear it, but this is the facts and any doctor

will tell him the same.

Kimber

[Guest guest]

Hi deandra,

welcome to the group. it is a very caring & supportive community. thank you for

your introduction. keep posting, it help.

mj

>

> Hello!

>

> I'm fairly new to IE. While I'm not overweight, I feel as though I was headed

down that path before this book.

>

> It all started 3 years ago when I read " Skinny bitch " (avoid this book! it

ruined my life with food). I was already a skinny bitch but thought I could

improve so I decided to go vegetarian after that. That meant eating a lot of

cheese in place of meat and for the first time in my life, overeating in the

extreme. It's a lucky thing I was already into exercise. I remember having a

" farewell to Mcs " meal. A nice big mac (my favorite). Avoiding meat made

me feel morally superior. I quickly became addicted to chocolate to fill a void,

and ate it until headaches set in.

>

> I finally decided to diet after approx a 10lb weight gain post high school

over a 3 year period (still not overweight, just skewed body preception). I

limited myself to 1200 calories a day or tried to and " failed " so I binged,

because I had already messed up anyway. I gorged on peanut butter when chocolate

wasn't around or caramel icing (two items I never cared much for before the

deprivation!). I avoided restaurants and turned down social invitations until

the lbs came off, which they never did. Food became my obessesion for the first

time in my life. I never cared about calories or fat grams before. I was the

fast food queen in high school - my friends used to marvel at how skinny I was

despite my food intake. It finally hit me after reading IE that I used to eat

exactly that way! When I was hungry I ate and stopped when I was full. It didn't

matter that I ate crap, I was able to stay slim, happy, and SANE, because I

ignored diets and listened to the signals.

>

> So here I am, ready to take back what's mine. It's been up and down so far. I

have a string of good days, and not so good days and some stressors that set me

off. Winter does not help either. Chocolate needs some work as I sTILL go

overboard when I know darn well I'm full and keeping extra around seems to set

off more overeating. Glad for this community!

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome Deandra. I've been following IE principles for a while now, but joined this group only recently. There is wonderful support here.I love your story. Thanks for sharing it.

Hello!

I'm fairly new to IE. While I'm not overweight, I feel as though I was headed down that path before this book.

It all started 3 years ago when I read "Skinny bitch" (avoid this book! it ruined my life with food). I was already a skinny bitch but thought I could improve so I decided to go vegetarian after that. That meant eating a lot of cheese in place of meat and for the first time in my life, overeating in the extreme. It's a lucky thing I was already into exercise. I remember having a "farewell to Mcs" meal. A nice big mac (my favorite). Avoiding meat made me feel morally superior. I quickly became addicted to chocolate to fill a void, and ate it until headaches set in.

I finally decided to diet after approx a 10lb weight gain post high school over a 3 year period (still not overweight, just skewed body preception). I limited myself to 1200 calories a day or tried to and "failed" so I binged, because I had already messed up anyway. I gorged on peanut butter when chocolate wasn't around or caramel icing (two items I never cared much for before the deprivation!). I avoided restaurants and turned down social invitations until the lbs came off, which they never did. Food became my obessesion for the first time in my life. I never cared about calories or fat grams before. I was the fast food queen in high school - my friends used to marvel at how skinny I was despite my food intake. It finally hit me after reading IE that I used to eat exactly that way! When I was hungry I ate and stopped when I was full. It didn't matter that I ate crap, I was able to stay slim, happy, and SANE, because I ignored diets and listened to the signals.

So here I am, ready to take back what's mine. It's been up and down so far. I have a string of good days, and not so good days and some stressors that set me off. Winter does not help either. Chocolate needs some work as I sTILL go overboard when I know darn well I'm full and keeping extra around seems to set off more overeating. Glad for this community!