Ode to the Bards of Oxycodone (The Examining Room of Dr. )

[Guest guest]

From this Doctor Blog comes this rather amusing anecdote - I can relate to this,

as oxycodone is a big problem in the mountains of SW VA and other poor

Appalachian communities.

http://drcharles.blogspot.com/2006/01/ode-to-bards-of-oxycodone.html

Ode to the Bards of Oxycodone (The Examining Room of Dr. )

From whence do they get their fabulous stories - these modern day bards of

opiate addiction?

Oh, how they spin their tales of woe with oratorical grace! Oh, how they sing

their songs of despair with orchestral harmony!

Never is a back simply injured. Never is an ankle merely twisted.

Instead, he needs oxycodone every day since heroically rescuing people from the

burning twin towers of New York one fine day in September.

She needs oxycodone every day because she is traveling to Pittsburgh to attend

the funeral of her father, who has miraculously died at least five times that I

can recall.

He needs oxycodone every day, or he will " show up at my house at three in the

morning to share his pain with me. "

She needs oxycodone every day because her pain is just incomprehensible.

Am I the medieval Welsh Lord who decides how much their songs are worth? A fine

tale indeed, master bard. Please take these thirty oxycodone pills as

recompense, and godspeed. Travel this countryside with your tale, and may all

the lords in the land reward you as generously as I have.

Or am I the common man in the pub, accosted by their solicitous poems, armed

with only my wits and my fists. While I do appreciate your tale, young bard, I

do not think it worthy of oxycodone. Please take these thirty ibuprofen pills

as recompense, and godspeed. Travel this countryside with your tale, and may

your legend of pain be justly rewarded by every patron you meet.

I listen to their tales. I size them up. I consider their vague threats. I show

many the door without tokens of appreciation. I give many what they have sung

for.

Shall I post a sign on my keep: " No Bards, No Songs, No Oxycodone Today, Lads. "

No, I won't. Rather, I'll sit on my small rotating stool, the pitiful throne of

my kingdom, and watch the traveling performers who find my court each day.

[Guest guest]

He did say though " I give many what they have sung

for. "

I'm sure it's a tough call - it is a heavily abused drug and maybe

like you said it is the only comfort for people who are desperate.

Unfortunately, he has to be the judge and jury - not an easy task. I

wouldn't want to be that judge. My wife used to be a dental

hygienist for some 20 years and saw many a soul wandering in looking

for drugs - perhaps for good reason, perhaps not. Where we live, many

have no insurance and we'll no doubt be joining those ranks very

shortly as our insurance premiums escalate yearly 15-20%.

Mark

wrote:

There is an old saying about .... until you walk in somebody's shoes.

I see lots and lots of people here with ripped out backs, no

insurance, no place to go in the prestigious halls of the in-the-group

doctors. I thank God that with no life, these people have their

oxycontin. I also thank God that I don't need it. This kind of

thinking - to probably only me - is sort of hate-crime mentality and

being ready to damn others who are different from us.