I've been sick and trying to jump back in, hard to do

[Guest guest]

Hey Y'all,

This is Marti.

I've been a member for a while now, but I've had pneumonia, and bronchitis

before that, since Christmas. It's complicated by my Sarcoidosis and it's

really got a hold on me. I'm trying to stay out of the hospital and have had my

son here taking care of me. He's got to go back tonight and one of my

neighbors will check on me. My daughter Andi works, has 3 kids, and is 40 min

away but she e-mails and calls a lot.

I've tried several times to jump back into the posting on site, but I just

can't seem to find a place that's not in the middle of something I know nothing

about and I don't want to intrude on on-going conversations and strings. I also

see so many new members and I haven't welcomed any of you and I feel bad about

that. So I just thought I would kind of join all over again.

I'm Marti. I have Fibro and was dx in 1991 after two years of trying to find

out what was wrong with me. I was an extremely active person as most people on

here were before the fibro dragon breathed it's fire on me. I was a wife, a

mother of two, a business owner, a volunteer at a home for battered women, at

the kids schools, their activities and church, played competitive tennis 4Xweek,

cooked dinner, helped with homework, particularly helped my son with his

because he has Asperger Syndrome. and was an advocate for him and other

children. There was more and I never got sick or felt exhausted. Of course I

felt tired at times, but a good tired. The first thing that went was my tennis

which I had been playing since I was 5 and I loved the most, but was the most

expendable and took the most energy. Subsequently I was divorced in 1996, gave

up my volunteer work and gradually the beast took away everything until it

finally got my business in 2003. I make a meager

income and barely get by. I do not have SSD. I had saved some for retirement

and so don't qualify for medicaid or assistance. I will lose my home by the end

of the year and will have to find someplace to live, but I have no idea where.

I live in a small town in CT. I am 59, but am surprised when I look in the

mirror because I think like I'm barely 40. I have 2 children. Andi 34, is a

wife to Joe and mother to Jack 6, Brady 3 and Aidan 9 mons. She and Joe take

turns working and staying home with the kids, so there is no daycare. She is

very busy and lives 40 min away. 30 is a Special Education Teacher in

elementary school and is working on his masters in spec. ed., doing his thesis

this semester. He also works the 5 to 11 shift on weekdays and 10am to 11pm

shifts on every other Saturday and 2 to 11 shift on every other Sunday as a Med

Tech in a hospital. He isn't married but has a lot of friends and has an active

social life. He still needs help coping with life on a daily basis by phone

with me. He's worth it. He's very nurturing and is as helpful as he can be for

me while living 2 hours away in Boston. He is the only one of my family and

friends who actually " gets it " - know what

fibromyalgia does to me.

I have and take meds for Hypothyroidism, AADD, Narcolepsy, Sarcoidosis, Acid

Reflux, Bronchial Asthma, Allergies, PTSD, Depression, DID, and Anxiety

disorder. I also have but do not have meds for Fibromyalgia (except

cyclobenzaprine), IBS, Sleep Apnea and a few other things. Before I had Fibro I

had all of the other things. I know that there is thought that Fibro can be

brought on by trauma. I have PTSD because of an abusive upbringing and an

abusive marriage. I also had surgery on two ruptured discs, cervical 1 and 2,

in my neck 2 years before I was dx with Fibro. I kind of think the trauma was

the surgery, but don't know of course. I've also had a doctor tell me that

Narcolepsy can be brought on by an abusive childhood. Don't know what that has

anything to do with anything.

That's basically my story and if it's OK I'll just try to jump back into the

conversations, as I feel better a little at a time.

I'm sure you're as exhausted reading this as I am writing it.

I do want to add a welcome to all the newcomers that I have missed. I hope to

get to know you as soon as possible. I know you will find here the warm,

wonderful, supportive people that I have. I've really missed all of you on this

site. I need some cheering up and I know this is the place to come.

Thanks for reading this diatribe - if you could make it through - I really

appreciate it.

Marti

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