RE: Unity vs the Individual - Attn. Dave Marcoot

[Guest guest]

Dave,

Your comment about your sponsor only being concerned with the program and

not your well being, struck home. I've sensed that not only with my [ex]

sponsor, but with the way others in AA/XA treat individuals as well. Of

course, keeping in mind the First Tradition: Our common welfare should come

first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity, that shouldn't be

particularly surprising. Those who accept the program entirely are embraced.

Those who do not, are viewed as outsiders, in denial, doomed, etc. Of course

your INDIVIDUAL well-being wasn't that important. It's the GROUP that really

matters.

Re: Steppers won't let up on me!

that is an excellent point.

when i fired my sponsor (i wont go into detail, but he was

extremely emotionally abusive and was only concerned with the

Program, not my well being) i did it after a meeting, i was loud,

forceful, confident i and direct. i told him his was " FIRED! " and i

was glad to see him flinch as he was sucking on his cigarette.

what i realized as soon as i said it, was i had used my right to

strip him of any authority he had over me, he and i had forgotten

that the only reason he had titled of sponsor to begin with was i

had asked him to be one. i felt good, doing it in way i did,

because it wasn't first time he had a sponsee do that to him for

those reasons. and although i was loud , angry and created an

scene, i didnt curse, or use violence. hopefully, other members

of that group got the picture of how he treats the people he

claimed to want to help. but more likely, they will have focused on

that i was angry, and must have been a dry drunk.

dave

> Holly and All

> One thing it might be helpful to remember about these people

is that what power they have is that which a person gives them.

They receive that power every

time somebody walks into a meeting and sits down and don't

lose that power until the same person walks out, closing the

door firmly behind them.

>

> Problems occur because the type of person who walks into an

AA meeting and stays for any amount of time is, by definition, a

person who is unsure about

how to handle their drinking issue, most likely lacking the

self-confidence to say that the emperor has no clothes. This

person, upon deciding AA is not for

them, will generally try to close the door softly when leaving,

hoping they aren't noticed.