Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 .... sorry to hear about your insensitive friend, soon to be ex-friend i think .... it's one thing to be plain old apathetic about what someone tells you about how they feel, but to actually be condescending and disbelieving is horrible ! i have been thinking that i'm not going to tell anyone i have RA anymore since 99.9% of people don't get it and will just make you feel like a hypochondriac. i was thinking of finding some sort of brochure or printed material i can just hand them, which outlines the seriousness of what we've got, and all the debilitating symptoms we endure. every time i try " explaining " RA and it's true nature, i feel like a total goose. since dolores is a good writer, maybe she could come up with something along those lines <hint, hint> ; ... or i could write it myself with someone's help if needs be. i also find the general lack of empathy to be a real disappointment about the human race. i mean, all our actions are based on emotion, not logic ! we're all here on this planet in basically the same predicament, with the same hopes and fears and dreams as each other, but people act like other people are some sort of different life form to them. makes no sense ! the only thing that makes us different is that we are born to different parents in different circumstances, of which we have no say in the matter. none of asked to get a disease or have the circumstances we do. when i look at other people, i see myself, because in everyone else there's an aspect of me. when i do that, i can have a degree of empathy. it's quite hard to do because our natural instinct is to think that we are better than other people and would never get into the same predicaments as them haha! life would sure be lonely without this forum ... take care, Leonie rheumatic Re: Depression in Chronic Illnesses! The lesson I've learned the hard way is when people don't listen, don't believe, don't support me with this illness, our relationship is jeopardized. Scleroderma is not just testing me, it's testing my family & friends, and only a handful are passing the test. I recently was telling a long-term friend how expensive Minocin and my supplements are. He replied that I should take the generic, there's no difference. He quickly refuted me with 'science' when I tried to explain, ending it with a shameful " Well, it's your choice " . Later in the conversation I was telling him how I've felt so lost since I became sick. He said I should just 'laugh it off', and that I'm starting to sound like his grandmother. I felt totally unheard, and said I had to get off the phone to work on finding cheaper ways to get meds. He replied that if he were me, he would just give up & die because that's his life philosophy, to let nature take its course. I never would have guessed how insensitive people can be until my dx. A true friend with good communication skills would have asked me more questions, let me talk it out and let me know that he really hears me. Would have offered on-point support, helped me brainstorm solutions, just been on my side. If he was uncomfortable with my 'negative' feelings, they would have passed naturally had he taken a helpful role, instead of throwing out his surface level advice. Since my dx I've lost so many relationships over insensitivities. Our entire culture seems to be needing lessons in empathy and communication & especially listening skills. Since everyone in these forums is in the same boat, that's the one thing I feel we can count on one another for, shared understanding. These forums keep me functioning emotionally. These forums are an essential component to my physical and emotional health. I don't post often, but I read every post, and every post makes me more knowledgable, and stronger. I feel somehow bonded with you all in this magical electronic world. What the heck did people like us do before this electronic medium? Hi lynne > > > > > > > > As you know my Dr. prscribed Medrol 2 mg 4 days a week > > > > to lower my inflammation. my ESR is high 120. > > > > I thought it is not a bad idea because i read high > > > > inflammtion doesn't allow minocin to penetrate cells. > > > > anyway last nightI took my first medrol and I got up > > > > with less pain and less stiffness. My hands are no > > > > puffy right now. wow I didn't know a low dose of > > > > steroid can make a big difference. I don't like to > > > > take steroid because of side effects. my Dr. also > > > > doesn't like it. I am going to take it only 3 days a > > > > week. I hope it helps me to put on some weight. > > > > what do you think? > > > > By the way you do lots of work. I couldn't do such > > > > amonth of work even when I was healthy. like you I > > > > always followed a healthy diet, did excersize. no > > > > smoking and drinking but I was not a happy person. > > > > I didn't realize the most important thing is my > > > > health. > > > > > > > > enjoy the weekend > > > > > > > > soheila > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Search. > > > http://tools.search./newsearch/category.php? > > > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with > > > Search. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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