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Making A Decision

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Hey Gang,

The following email was sent to me by Barbara Cummings, a patient in Dr.

Marcus' support group in the MD-DC area. Barbara and her sister sat down one

day and devised this list to help her decide to go ahead with her surgery. It

is so powerful that, with her permission, I am forwarding it to all of

you. Please pass it in as you see fit.

BobA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Making a Decision

By Barbara Cummings

1. When was the last time you shopped in a regular clothing store, like

Hoechst's?

2. When was the last time you wore size 8 underpants?

3. Do you have more than 1 belt in your drawer that you have never worn?

4. Can you shower in the communal room at the local health club?

5. Can you swim?  Do you?  With normal sized people?

6. Could you take an aerobics class and stay to the end?

7. When was the last time you rode a roller coaster?

8. When you fly, do you have to ask for a seat belt extension?

9. Does your car seat belt cut you across your neck?

10. When was the last time you could wear " one size fits most? "

11. When you go upstairs, does your heart pound until you think it's going to

jump out of your chest?  Does it hurt?

12. Can you climb a flight of stairs without pain in your knees?  Two flights?

13. Have you ever looked longingly at people using scooters in Walmart?

14. When was the last time you went to the beach?  In a bathing suit?  To

swim?  And not thought people were looking at you?

15. Do you buy your clothes in a department store, or is Lane , Dress

Barn Woman, Fashion Bug Plus, and Roman's the stores you go to?

16. When was the last time you had on sexy underwear?

17. Is your neck bigger than most people's heads?

18. Is your leg bigger than most people's waists?

19. Have you run out of diet solutions, having tried every one of them in the

past, only to fail?

20. If you had a medical emergency, would the paramedics have to struggle to

get you into the rescue vehicle?  Could they perform CPR on you, or, because

of your fat, would they have to use paddles?

21. Have you ever cried because of you are overweight?

22. Have you ever lost a partner or spouse because you are overweight?

23. Have you ever lost a job because you are overweight?

24. Have you ever been denied a job or promotion because of your size?

25. Have you ever gone into therapy for weight related problems like

depression or sexual dysfunction?

26. Was the therapist overweight and struggling, or was s/he normal weight,

with no idea what you were going through?

27. Have you ever been in therapy, only to find that you're listening more to

the therapist's problems than yours?

28. Have you ever taken more than one prescription drug for weight control?

29. If there were a fire in your building and you were on the fifth floor,

would you be able to go down the stairs in less than three minutes?

30. Do you have health problems related to overweight -- like diabetes,

arthritis, knee or hip joint pain, heart palpitations, irregular heart beat,

etc.,

31. Do you think a thyroid pill will help all your problems?

32. Can you look at yourself naked in the mirror, or do you avert your eyes?

33. When was the last time someone other than your

partner/husband/wife/children told you that you were beautiful?  Pretty?

 Pleasingly plump?  Any compliment about your appearance at all?  Lately?

34. Can you still fit behind the wheel of a car without pushing the seat way,

way back?  Would you consider it dangerous to ride with a driver who can't

reach the pedals?  Can you reach them easily?

35. Do the seats in your chairs and sofas have indentations where you sit?

 Do you crush the seat cushions wherever you sit?  Has anyone ever asked you

not to sit on a chair?  Did you understand that it was because you might

break it?

36. If you were asked to go sailing, could you?

37. Does your greatest night out (date) consist of an " all you can eat "

restaurant?

38. Can you fit comfortably in the seats at your local theater?

39. Can you slide easily into a booth at a restaurant?

40. Can you clean yourself thoroughly after normal bodily functions?

41. Can you sit without your knees bowing out to the side?

42. When was the last time you crossed your legs?

43. When was the last time you tied your shoes without sitting down?  Do you

ever call your husband/wife/children to help tie your shoes?

44. Does your shoe wardrobe consist mostly of slip-ins?

45. Do you ever wonder where the beauty and joy went?

46. When was the last time you DIDN'T wear queen/king size?

47. Have children ever been afraid of you?  What about your grandchildren?

 Do they run to hug you, or do they hang back?  Did you ever consider that it

might be because your weight overwhelms or frightens them?

48. Do you want to be there when your children have grandchildren?  Do you

want to be able to play with them, really play with them?

49. Could you buy a fancy, beautiful mother-of-the-bride dress, and be

comfortable in it?  Would you look gorgeous in it?

50. When was the last time you could cuddle a child IN YOUR LAP?

51. Has your son or daughter had to fight a kid because they called you fatty?

52. If your child were your size, would you be okay with it, or would you do

whatever you could to help him/her achieve a normal weight?  Including

surgery?  If so, why not you? Don't you deserve what your child deserves?

53. Do you fear the surgery?  If you do, do you also fear:  Amputation?

 (It's in the cards.)  Kidney failure?  (Wait.  It's coming.)  Heart attack?

 (At your weight, you probably won't make it.)  Stroke?  (Reduced blood flow

in overweight people and high blood pressure -- it's a probability.)  A

wheelchair existence?  ('Nuff said.)  A really short life span?  (Almost

guaranteed)

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