Guest guest Posted February 6, 2011 Report Share Posted February 6, 2011 So Nada keeps texting me and asking if I'm mad at her and that she's been trying to get ahold of me for 3 days. This is a lie, because she hasn't tried to call me or text me for 3 days. I have received a couple of rude texts. I want to tell her that I'm not mad, just disappointed that she didn't bother to call and say that they have heat. Not that I expect much from them anyway, but it is disappointing. And then part of me wants to continue ignoring her. What should I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 6, 2011 Report Share Posted February 6, 2011 There are no " shoulds " or " oughts " . Its just about what you want and can live with. Me personally, I'd suggest being honest. Tell nada that she hurt your feelings pretty badly when she didn't tell you right away that her heat was back on, and didn't invite you (and your family) over to spend the night with her instead of freezing. Nada will either be remorseful and apologize, or she will not. She may become angry and blame you in some way, or call you " overly sensitive " by saying something like, " Its no big deal, I don't understand what you're so upset about. " If nada dismisses your feelings as unimportant and refuses to apologize, then, you have your answer, seems to me: that maybe its time to just back away and not be so emotionally close to nada any more. Turn the level of the relationship down to " acquaintance " level, and stop expecting her to act like a real mom. You're the only one who can figure out what you want and need, and what you can and can't tolerate. What do you want? What do you need? That is what will dictate what you " should " do. -Annie > > So Nada keeps texting me and asking if I'm mad at her and that she's been trying to get ahold of me for 3 days. This is a lie, because she hasn't tried to call me or text me for 3 days. I have received a couple of rude texts. I want to tell her that I'm not mad, just disappointed that she didn't bother to call and say that they have heat. Not that I expect much from them anyway, but it is disappointing. And then part of me wants to continue ignoring her. What should I do? > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 6, 2011 Report Share Posted February 6, 2011 If this is NC for you, you don't have to say a thing. or you can wait and speak to her when you want to. Don't allow her to pressure you. On Sun, Feb 6, 2011 at 6:59 AM, anuria67854 wrote: > > > There are no " shoulds " or " oughts " . Its just about what you want and can > live with. > > Me personally, I'd suggest being honest. Tell nada that she hurt your > feelings pretty badly when she didn't tell you right away that her heat was > back on, and didn't invite you (and your family) over to spend the night > with her instead of freezing. Nada will either be remorseful and apologize, > or she will not. She may become angry and blame you in some way, or call you > " overly sensitive " by saying something like, " Its no big deal, I don't > understand what you're so upset about. " > > If nada dismisses your feelings as unimportant and refuses to apologize, > then, you have your answer, seems to me: that maybe its time to just back > away and not be so emotionally close to nada any more. Turn the level of the > relationship down to " acquaintance " level, and stop expecting her to act > like a real mom. > > You're the only one who can figure out what you want and need, and what you > can and can't tolerate. What do you want? What do you need? That is what > will dictate what you " should " do. > > -Annie > > > > > > > So Nada keeps texting me and asking if I'm mad at her and that she's been > trying to get ahold of me for 3 days. This is a lie, because she hasn't > tried to call me or text me for 3 days. I have received a couple of rude > texts. I want to tell her that I'm not mad, just disappointed that she > didn't bother to call and say that they have heat. Not that I expect much > from them anyway, but it is disappointing. And then part of me wants to > continue ignoring her. What should I do? > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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