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Learning to re-parent

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Wow, T and I talked about so much tonight, and I actually left feeling like we

got somewhere. We were focusing on how I judge myself, I'm so hard on myself,

unforgiving, and I punish myself if I don't accomplish the things I want--down

to the smallest things like doing the dishes. We believe this is connected to

the lack of praise from my nada for any of my accomplishments. I mean, I was an

accomplished musician and played 5 instruments, a talented dancer and

choreographer who received several awards, a straight A AP student and straight

A college student who graduated with honors. I run marathons and ride 200 mile

bike rides and do things that are just way above average, but I honestly am not

impressed or proud of myself at all. And that's because nada never cared no

matter how well I did in anything. And when she does say the words: " I'm proud

of you " I cringe with horror because it's so empty and false.

I have a homework assignment for next week to write down 10 things I like about

myself. And I'm supposed to think about how I feel while writing these things. I

already hate this exercise.

It was interesting the thing he said like " wow, imagine the things you could

accomplish if you didn't punish yourself for not being perfect. "

It was a good session.

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great post!!.. oh yes, perfectionism.. alive an well in me.  and a punishing

spirit.. oh yes i have a punishing voice inside straight from her.  and i live

on to make some mistakes and still be gentle with myself.  wow!!blessings to

you,ann

Subject: Learning to re-parent

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Date: Thursday, February 17, 2011, 9:58 PM

 

Wow, T and I talked about so much tonight, and I actually left feeling

like we got somewhere. We were focusing on how I judge myself, I'm so hard on

myself, unforgiving, and I punish myself if I don't accomplish the things I

want--down to the smallest things like doing the dishes. We believe this is

connected to the lack of praise from my nada for any of my accomplishments. I

mean, I was an accomplished musician and played 5 instruments, a talented dancer

and choreographer who received several awards, a straight A AP student and

straight A college student who graduated with honors. I run marathons and ride

200 mile bike rides and do things that are just way above average, but I

honestly am not impressed or proud of myself at all. And that's because nada

never cared no matter how well I did in anything. And when she does say the

words: " I'm proud of you " I cringe with horror because it's so empty and false.

I have a homework assignment for next week to write down 10 things I like about

myself. And I'm supposed to think about how I feel while writing these things. I

already hate this exercise.

It was interesting the thing he said like " wow, imagine the things you could

accomplish if you didn't punish yourself for not being perfect. "

It was a good session.

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Oh - ditto ditto ditto

Well, I don't like to run but other than that. . . .

T and I have had very similar sessions.

XOXO

>

>

> great post!!.. oh yes, perfectionism.. alive an well in me. and a

> punishing spirit.. oh yes i have a punishing voice inside straight from her.

> and i live on to make some mistakes and still be gentle with myself.

> wow!!blessings to you,ann

>

>

>

>

> Subject: Learning to re-parent

> To: WTOAdultChildren1

> Date: Thursday, February 17, 2011, 9:58 PM

>

>

>

>

> Wow, T and I talked about so much tonight, and I actually left feeling like

> we got somewhere. We were focusing on how I judge myself, I'm so hard on

> myself, unforgiving, and I punish myself if I don't accomplish the things I

> want--down to the smallest things like doing the dishes. We believe this is

> connected to the lack of praise from my nada for any of my accomplishments.

> I mean, I was an accomplished musician and played 5 instruments, a talented

> dancer and choreographer who received several awards, a straight A AP

> student and straight A college student who graduated with honors. I run

> marathons and ride 200 mile bike rides and do things that are just way above

> average, but I honestly am not impressed or proud of myself at all. And

> that's because nada never cared no matter how well I did in anything. And

> when she does say the words: " I'm proud of you " I cringe with horror because

> it's so empty and false.

>

> I have a homework assignment for next week to write down 10 things I like

> about myself. And I'm supposed to think about how I feel while writing these

> things. I already hate this exercise.

>

> It was interesting the thing he said like " wow, imagine the things you

> could accomplish if you didn't punish yourself for not being perfect. "

>

> It was a good session.

>

>

>

>

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