Guest guest Posted March 9, 2011 Report Share Posted March 9, 2011 I don't want them reporting to me...they should be paid for and managed by my nada. That's a boundary I'm setting to the degree that it works. (may be pie-in-the-sky I know) I'm willing to screen workers and set the contact up, but I want her to stay responsible as long as possible. But from that POV it certainly gives nada every right to cancel/fire who she wants. It was the elaborate lying over months that got to me. And the fact that she can barely walk and lives in pretty filthy conditions, yet denies she needs help. I've seen a slight bit more willingness to admit she can't manage lately which is why I'm trying again. Still I'm doing my best to set what limits I can and encourage her to be as responsible for herself as she's able. I have a bad feeling at some point I may end up calling adult protective services on her because of her refusal of self-care - it came *really* close to that a couple years ago, long hoarding related story there for another time. Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2011 Report Share Posted March 9, 2011 , I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. It is never easy to watch someone regress or give up, especially our own Parent, even if she is a nada. Yes, I agree that it is her responsibility and that the degree you want to help is really a good boundary. But just remember, just as she is supposed to be responsible for herself, you are not responsible to bend over backwards & answer her every demand. I think calling protective services is a good idea if she continues to refuse. There is only so much any person can do for another who doesn't want to help themselves. Keeping you in my thoughts. It must be a very frustrating situation, and I'm sorry it is that way. Mia On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 10:19 PM, climberkayak wrote: > > > I don't want them reporting to me...they should be paid for and managed by > my nada. That's a boundary I'm setting to the degree that it works. (may be > pie-in-the-sky I know) I'm willing to screen workers and set the contact up, > but I want her to stay responsible as long as possible. > > But from that POV it certainly gives nada every right to cancel/fire who > she wants. It was the elaborate lying over months that got to me. And the > fact that she can barely walk and lives in pretty filthy conditions, yet > denies she needs help. I've seen a slight bit more willingness to admit she > can't manage lately which is why I'm trying again. Still I'm doing my best > to set what limits I can and encourage her to be as responsible for herself > as she's able. I have a bad feeling at some point I may end up calling adult > protective services on her because of her refusal of self-care - it came > *really* close to that a couple years ago, long hoarding related story there > for another time. > > Thanks! > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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