Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and deal with the now. Here's what's happening now. I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art hub. I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is an artist. So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for 3.5 hours. Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. He continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. He has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave me alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling that he is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had months to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed in something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance notice. I say then don't expect to have my help. I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to hide from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking care of us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing art!!!!!! He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's important to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's a stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't concentrate. Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! Advise me, wise ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Artists have little real world comprehension. Van Gogh sold only one painting , died penniless, and shot his ear off over a hooker. Rembrandt spent himself into penury buying antiquities to paint , and was a commercial failure because he didnt paint what his market demaned. 200 years later, people buy him, but cold comfort that is for him. Jackon Pollack was a mysoganistic boozer. Mozart was buried in a common pauper s grave. Artists frequently need to be bitch slapped. Doug > > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and deal > with the now. > > Here's what's happening now. > > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art hub. > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is an > artist. > > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for 3.5 > hours. > > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. He > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. He > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave me > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling that he > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had months > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed in > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance notice. I > say then don't expect to have my help. > > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to hide > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking care of > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing art!!!!!! > > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's important > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's a > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > concentrate. > > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > Advise me, wise ones. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Ha ha thanks Doug! Yeah, he's fairly low drama typically, but he seems to think I should be bowing down thanking him for interupting my important task. I have to wonder - is he trying to sabatoge my efforts? He isn't BPD - in fact he's usually about the gentlest most supportive person on earth. But as I'm in therapy finding my voice, we sure fight a lot more. > > > > Artists have little real world comprehension. > > Van Gogh sold only one painting , died penniless, and shot his ear off > over a hooker. > > Rembrandt spent himself into penury buying antiquities to paint , and > was a commercial failure because he didnt paint what his market demaned. > 200 years later, people buy him, but cold comfort that is for him. > > Jackon Pollack was a mysoganistic boozer. > > Mozart was buried in a common pauper s grave. > > Artists frequently need to be bitch slapped. > > Doug > > > > > > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and > deal > > with the now. > > > > Here's what's happening now. > > > > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major > art hub. > > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby > is an > > artist. > > > > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for > 3.5 > > hours. > > > > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my > taxes. He > > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > information. He > > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. > Leave me > > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > that he > > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > months > > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed > in > > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > notice. I > > say then don't expect to have my help. > > > > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > hide > > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he > is > > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > care of > > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > art!!!!!! > > > > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > silent, > > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > > > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > important > > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. > It's a > > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > > concentrate. > > > > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > > > Advise me, wise ones. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 PS yeah Pollack was such a DOUCHE!!!!! He's one of the worst. I'm getting ready to write a blog post about Picasso the child abuser too. On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 11:48 AM, Girlscout Cowboy < girlscout.cowboy@...> wrote: > Ha ha thanks Doug! > Yeah, he's fairly low drama typically, but he seems to think I should be > bowing down thanking him for interupting my important task. > I have to wonder - is he trying to sabatoge my efforts? > > He isn't BPD - in fact he's usually about the gentlest most supportive > person on earth. But as I'm in therapy finding my voice, we sure fight a lot > more. > > > >> >> >> >> Artists have little real world comprehension. >> >> Van Gogh sold only one painting , died penniless, and shot his ear off >> over a hooker. >> >> Rembrandt spent himself into penury buying antiquities to paint , and >> was a commercial failure because he didnt paint what his market demaned. >> 200 years later, people buy him, but cold comfort that is for him. >> >> Jackon Pollack was a mysoganistic boozer. >> >> Mozart was buried in a common pauper s grave. >> >> Artists frequently need to be bitch slapped. >> >> Doug >> >> >> > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and >> deal >> > with the now. >> > >> > Here's what's happening now. >> > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major >> art hub. >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby >> is an >> > artist. >> > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for >> 3.5 >> > hours. >> > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my >> taxes. He >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and >> information. He >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. >> Leave me >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling >> that he >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had >> months >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed >> in >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance >> notice. I >> > say then don't expect to have my help. >> > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to >> hide >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he >> is >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking >> care of >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing >> art!!!!!! >> > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go >> silent, >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. >> > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's >> important >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. >> It's a >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't >> > concentrate. >> > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! >> > >> > Advise me, wise ones. >> > >> > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 It sounds like both tasks are extremely important! Come on Cowboy, you know most people procrastinate when it comes to taxes. Give the guy a break. LOL Annie 2 > > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and deal > with the now. > > Here's what's happening now. > > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art hub. > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is an > artist. > > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for 3.5 > hours. > > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. He > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. He > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave me > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling that he > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had months > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed in > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance notice. I > say then don't expect to have my help. > > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to hide > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking care of > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing art!!!!!! > > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's important > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's a > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > concentrate. > > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > Advise me, wise ones. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Ha ha they moved tax day back by 3 days!!! he's okay! On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 12:40 PM, CA Annie wrote: > > > It sounds like both tasks are extremely important! Come on Cowboy, you know > most people procrastinate when it comes to taxes. Give the guy a break. LOL > Annie 2 > > > > > > > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and > deal > > with the now. > > > > Here's what's happening now. > > > > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art > hub. > > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is > an > > artist. > > > > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for > 3.5 > > hours. > > > > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. > He > > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. > He > > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave > me > > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling that > he > > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > months > > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed in > > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance notice. > I > > say then don't expect to have my help. > > > > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to hide > > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is > > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking care > of > > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing art!!!!!! > > > > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, > > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > > > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > important > > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's a > > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > > concentrate. > > > > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > > > Advise me, wise ones. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Okay crisis resolved. Our wonderful Coach Doug talked me through the relationship emergency. Boyfriend and i made up. AND he got me the biggest tax return of my life! In worse news I'm still not done with the job app. My plan is to get my T a very nice present with my tax return (a night or two at a beautiful hotel and a romance package for her and her sweetie). I've been wanting to do this for my T forever, so the timing is perfect. I have a client that is a beautiful hotel, so I can use my discount. And what should I get for my boyfriend? How about a puppy? Oh wait, I'm the one that wants another puppy. He wants a Picasso. Oh wait, the tax return ain't that big! On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 12:43 PM, Girlscout Cowboy < girlscout.cowboy@...> wrote: > Ha ha they moved tax day back by 3 days!!! he's okay! > > On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 12:40 PM, CA Annie wrote: > >> >> >> It sounds like both tasks are extremely important! Come on Cowboy, you >> know most people procrastinate when it comes to taxes. Give the guy a break. >> LOL >> Annie 2 >> >> >> >> > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and >> deal >> > with the now. >> > >> > Here's what's happening now. >> > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art >> hub. >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is >> an >> > artist. >> > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for >> 3.5 >> > hours. >> > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. >> He >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. >> He >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave >> me >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling >> that he >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had >> months >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed >> in >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance >> notice. I >> > say then don't expect to have my help. >> > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to >> hide >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking >> care of >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing >> art!!!!!! >> > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. >> > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's >> important >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's >> a >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't >> > concentrate. >> > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! >> > >> > Advise me, wise ones. >> > >> > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Could you combine the night or two at a hotel with a visit to a nice art gallery? Glad things worked out well > >> > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and > >> deal > >> > with the now. > >> > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > >> > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art > >> hub. > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is > >> an > >> > artist. > >> > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for > >> 3.5 > >> > hours. > >> > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. > >> He > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. > >> He > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave > >> me > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > >> that he > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > >> months > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed > >> in > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > >> notice. I > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > >> > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > >> hide > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > >> care of > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > >> art!!!!!! > >> > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > >> > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > >> important > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's > >> a > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > >> > concentrate. > >> > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > >> > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > >> > > >> > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Yes, i sure could! > > > Could you combine the night or two at a hotel with a visit to a nice art > gallery? > > Glad things worked out well > > > > > >> > > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket > and > > >> deal > > >> > with the now. > > >> > > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > > >> > > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major > art > > >> hub. > > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my > baby is > > >> an > > >> > artist. > > >> > > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous > and > > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it > for > > >> 3.5 > > >> > hours. > > >> > > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my > taxes. > > >> He > > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > information. > > >> He > > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. > Leave > > >> me > > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > > >> that he > > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > > >> months > > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am > engrossed > > >> in > > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > > >> notice. I > > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > > >> > > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > > >> hide > > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how > he is > > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > > >> care of > > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > > >> art!!!!!! > > >> > > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > silent, > > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just > pay > > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > >> > > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > > >> important > > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. > It's > > >> a > > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I > can't > > >> > concentrate. > > >> > > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > >> > > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 How about take boyfriend to hotel WITH new puppy? Ha ha On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 7:42 PM, Girlscout Cowboy < girlscout.cowboy@...> wrote: > Yes, i sure could! > > > >> >> >> Could you combine the night or two at a hotel with a visit to a nice art >> gallery? >> >> Glad things worked out well >> >> >> >> > >> > >> > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket >> and >> > >> deal >> > >> > with the now. >> > >> > >> > >> > Here's what's happening now. >> > >> > >> > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major >> art >> > >> hub. >> > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my >> baby is >> > >> an >> > >> > artist. >> > >> > >> > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous >> and >> > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it >> for >> > >> 3.5 >> > >> > hours. >> > >> > >> > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my >> taxes. >> > >> He >> > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and >> information. >> > >> He >> > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. >> Leave >> > >> me >> > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house >> yelling >> > >> that he >> > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had >> > >> months >> > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am >> engrossed >> > >> in >> > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance >> > >> notice. I >> > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. >> > >> > >> > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place >> to >> > >> hide >> > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how >> he is >> > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by >> taking >> > >> care of >> > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing >> > >> art!!!!!! >> > >> > >> > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go >> silent, >> > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just >> pay >> > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. >> > >> > >> > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's >> > >> important >> > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. >> It's >> > >> a >> > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I >> can't >> > >> > concentrate. >> > >> > >> > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! >> > >> > >> > >> > Advise me, wise ones. >> > >> > >> > >> > >> > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2011 Report Share Posted March 19, 2011 Cowboy, therapists are not allowed to accept any gifts from clients. Totally against their written code of ethics. Unless T means something else? I'd hate to see you spend all that money and then learn that she can't accept it. > >> > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket and > >> deal > >> > with the now. > >> > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > >> > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major art > >> hub. > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my baby is > >> an > >> > artist. > >> > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous and > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it for > >> 3.5 > >> > hours. > >> > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my taxes. > >> He > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and information. > >> He > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. Leave > >> me > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > >> that he > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > >> months > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am engrossed > >> in > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > >> notice. I > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > >> > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > >> hide > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how he is > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > >> care of > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > >> art!!!!!! > >> > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go silent, > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just pay > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > >> > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > >> important > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. It's > >> a > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I can't > >> > concentrate. > >> > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > >> > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > >> > > >> > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Oh that's interesting - I give her presents every week. A jar of jam, something I made etc. On Sat, Mar 19, 2011 at 9:47 PM, CA Annie wrote: > > > Cowboy, therapists are not allowed to accept any gifts from clients. > Totally against their written code of ethics. Unless T means something else? > I'd hate to see you spend all that money and then learn that she can't > accept it. > > > > >> > > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket > and > > >> deal > > >> > with the now. > > >> > > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > > >> > > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major > art > > >> hub. > > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my > baby is > > >> an > > >> > artist. > > >> > > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous > and > > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it > for > > >> 3.5 > > >> > hours. > > >> > > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my > taxes. > > >> He > > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > information. > > >> He > > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. > Leave > > >> me > > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > > >> that he > > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > > >> months > > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am > engrossed > > >> in > > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > > >> notice. I > > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > > >> > > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > > >> hide > > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how > he is > > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > > >> care of > > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > > >> art!!!!!! > > >> > > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > silent, > > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just > pay > > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > >> > > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > > >> important > > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. > It's > > >> a > > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I > can't > > >> > concentrate. > > >> > > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > >> > > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 HAHAHA! Couldn't agree more Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Those kinds of little gifts are ok, meaning most will T's would probably accept them (e.g., a jar of jelly, or homemade cookies, homemade candle, etc), but the kind you wish to give her, costing you big bucks is strictly prohibited. I learned this in my " Ethics " class in a counseling doctoral program. If your T accepts your weekend for two gift, then she is definitely in violation of her code of ethics. Annie 2 > > > >> > > > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future basket > > and > > > >> deal > > > >> > with the now. > > > >> > > > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > > > >> > > > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a major > > art > > > >> hub. > > > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my > > baby is > > > >> an > > > >> > artist. > > > >> > > > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is arduous > > and > > > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on it > > for > > > >> 3.5 > > > >> > hours. > > > >> > > > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do my > > taxes. > > > >> He > > > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > > information. > > > >> He > > > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm busy. > > Leave > > > >> me > > > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house yelling > > > >> that he > > > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have had > > > >> months > > > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am > > engrossed > > > >> in > > > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me advance > > > >> notice. I > > > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > > > >> > > > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a place to > > > >> hide > > > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about how > > he is > > > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by taking > > > >> care of > > > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > > > >> art!!!!!! > > > >> > > > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > > silent, > > > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will just > > pay > > > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to focus. > > > >> > > > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing that's > > > >> important > > > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can concentrate. > > It's > > > >> a > > > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I > > can't > > > >> > concentrate. > > > >> > > > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > > >> > > > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > > > >> > > > > >> > > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 Hmmm I'll have to look that up with my state's lisencing code. I believe that after almost a year of therapy my T would have filled me in if that was a boundary. On Sun, Mar 20, 2011 at 9:41 PM, CA Annie wrote: > > > Those kinds of little gifts are ok, meaning most will T's would probably > accept them (e.g., a jar of jelly, or homemade cookies, homemade candle, > etc), but the kind you wish to give her, costing you big bucks is strictly > prohibited. I learned this in my " Ethics " class in a counseling doctoral > program. If your T accepts your weekend for two gift, then she is definitely > in violation of her code of ethics. > > Annie 2 > > > > > > >> > > > > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future > basket > > > and > > > > >> deal > > > > >> > with the now. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a > major > > > art > > > > >> hub. > > > > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my > > > baby is > > > > >> an > > > > >> > artist. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is > arduous > > > and > > > > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on > it > > > for > > > > >> 3.5 > > > > >> > hours. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do > my > > > taxes. > > > > >> He > > > > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > > > information. > > > > >> He > > > > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm > busy. > > > Leave > > > > >> me > > > > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house > yelling > > > > >> that he > > > > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have > had > > > > >> months > > > > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am > > > engrossed > > > > >> in > > > > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me > advance > > > > >> notice. I > > > > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a > place to > > > > >> hide > > > > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about > how > > > he is > > > > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by > taking > > > > >> care of > > > > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > > > > >> art!!!!!! > > > > >> > > > > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > > > silent, > > > > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will > just > > > pay > > > > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to > focus. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing > that's > > > > >> important > > > > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can > concentrate. > > > It's > > > > >> a > > > > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I > > > can't > > > > >> > concentrate. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 Yes, let me know what you find. Now I'm really curious. I find it hard to believe that California would be so different than other states in terms of this issue. Annie 2 > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > My T says I need to stop putting all my eggs in the future > > basket > > > > and > > > > > >> deal > > > > > >> > with the now. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > Here's what's happening now. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > I'm very serious about applying for a job in a city that is a > > major > > > > art > > > > > >> hub. > > > > > >> > I think it would be a better environment for me and my baby - my > > > > baby is > > > > > >> an > > > > > >> > artist. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > So I got up early to apply for the job. The application is > > arduous > > > > and > > > > > >> > stupid. I'm afraid I will make a mistake. I''ve been working on > > it > > > > for > > > > > >> 3.5 > > > > > >> > hours. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > Then my baby - the artist - wakes up and decides to FINALLY do > > my > > > > taxes. > > > > > >> He > > > > > >> > continually distracts me, asking me to look up receipts and > > > > information. > > > > > >> He > > > > > >> > has had 3.5 MONTHS to ask me these questions. I tell him I'm > > busy. > > > > Leave > > > > > >> me > > > > > >> > alone. I need to concentrate. He follows me around the house > > yelling > > > > > >> that he > > > > > >> > is only trying to help me by finishing my taxes. I say you have > > had > > > > > >> months > > > > > >> > to do this, why do you have to decide to do it now when I am > > > > engrossed > > > > > >> in > > > > > >> > something? He says he just decided so he couldn't give me > > advance > > > > > >> notice. I > > > > > >> > say then don't expect to have my help. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > I do my typical thing, I gather all my stuff and look for a > > place to > > > > > >> hide > > > > > >> > from him. (fight or flight right). He follows me yelling about > > how > > > > he is > > > > > >> > trying to help me. I yell back that i'm trying to help HIM by > > taking > > > > > >> care of > > > > > >> > us and looking to move us to a city that will embrace his f-ing > > > > > >> art!!!!!! > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > He says " if you don't want to fight, stop yelling back. " So I go > > > > silent, > > > > > >> > after telling him to leave my stupid taxes alone, that I will > > just > > > > pay > > > > > >> > someone to do it. Someone who respects my time and need to > > focus. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > I could kill him!!!! Why can't he allow me to do this thing > > that's > > > > > >> important > > > > > >> > to me. All I am asking for is a little peace so I can > > concentrate. > > > > It's > > > > > >> a > > > > > >> > stressful thing to do. I am so angry right now that of course I > > > > can't > > > > > >> > concentrate. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > Did I do something wrong? My hell!!!! > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > Advise me, wise ones. > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > > > > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 That's the general rule that doctors are not allowed to accept gifts from their patients. The exception is when you give a gift for the whole office, like a box of candy they can all share. Then there's no chance of accusations about favoritism or the doctor being " bought " . My nada has done this for years, given restaurant gift certificates to her doctor. However, after meeting him and seeing how he's handled her the past couple years, I don't have much respect for him at all. She tried to give a gift to a couple of other doctors recently and they politely declined explaining the law about receiving gifts. > > > > > > > Cowboy, therapists are not allowed to accept any gifts from clients. > > Totally against their written code of ethics. Unless T means something else? > > I'd hate to see you spend all that money and then learn that she can't > > accept it. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 When I worked at a large corporation we were not allowed to accept gifts over $10 from clients either, and I work in a non-medical-related industry. Our suppliers would send a yearly " Christmas Basket " for the whole department, though, that we could share. My Sister is in a social-work-related field and she is not allowed to accept any gifts from her clients, I believe. Her profession is more similar to a doctor-patient relationship. -Annie > > > > > > > > > > > Cowboy, therapists are not allowed to accept any gifts from clients. > > > Totally against their written code of ethics. Unless T means something else? > > > I'd hate to see you spend all that money and then learn that she can't > > > accept it. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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