Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 Last night I was reminiscing with fiance about some of my childhood friends. I realized the specific friend I was talking about, we'll call her L, had a seriously messed up home life. Her father was a big time alcoholic and her and her siblings were left to pretty much fend for themselves after their mom died. I thought it was kind of strange that nada would let me go play over there from such a young age given some of the stuff I did see when I was there. This got me thinking about other childhood friends. I had at least 3 female friends in high school who were sexually abused by their fathers or step fathers. Another friend who's father molested her two older sisters for years before her mother did anything about it. Other friends with volatile/abusive home lives, etc. I had never really thought of all of this before, but now looking back at it... it was a fu**ing epidemic of abuse! This really bothers me. I never like to hear other people have parents similar to or worse than my nada and I slowly learned about my friends' trials & tribulations as we grew up. I guess the thing with L's dad didn't seem so weird/abnormal/neglectful because my own home life was so messed up. In some ways I envied her because they got little to no parental supervision. So what is the commonality between all of those families, besides all living in the same city? I guess it could have been socioeconomic factors or something like that, but certainly not every middle class to lower middle class family abuses their kids? I feel kind of angry about it; that so many of us had it really bad. And while I realize there is likely no one factor that would influence so many different families in the same way that would cause them to abuse their kids, I am simply aghast that so many people my age who all grew up in the same city had to deal with this kind of bull sh**. Like I said, it was an epidemic. Anyway, I just thought I'd share that because it hit me last night. *sigh* Mia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 Hi, I was reading about the N epidemic and they were saying it comes out of the 70s Me generation stuff. Makes sense. > > > Last night I was reminiscing with fiance about some of my childhood > friends. > I realized the specific friend I was talking about, we'll call her L, had a > seriously messed up home life. Her father was a big time alcoholic and her > and her siblings were left to pretty much fend for themselves after their > mom died. I thought it was kind of strange that nada would let me go play > over there from such a young age given some of the stuff I did see when I > was there. > > This got me thinking about other childhood friends. I had at least 3 female > friends in high school who were sexually abused by their fathers or step > fathers. Another friend who's father molested her two older sisters for > years before her mother did anything about it. Other friends with > volatile/abusive home lives, etc. I had never really thought of all of this > before, but now looking back at it... it was a fu**ing epidemic of abuse! > > This really bothers me. I never like to hear other people have parents > similar to or worse than my nada and I slowly learned about my friends' > trials & tribulations as we grew up. I guess the thing with L's dad didn't > seem so weird/abnormal/neglectful because my own home life was so messed > up. > In some ways I envied her because they got little to no parental > supervision. > > So what is the commonality between all of those families, besides all > living > in the same city? I guess it could have been socioeconomic factors or > something like that, but certainly not every middle class to lower middle > class family abuses their kids? > > I feel kind of angry about it; that so many of us had it really bad. And > while I realize there is likely no one factor that would influence so many > different families in the same way that would cause them to abuse their > kids, I am simply aghast that so many people my age who all grew up in the > same city had to deal with this kind of bull sh**. Like I said, it was an > epidemic. > > Anyway, I just thought I'd share that because it hit me last night. *sigh* > > Mia > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 Possibly. The people I'm talking about thought were all born in the late 70s. On Mon, Mar 21, 2011 at 11:47 AM, Millicent Kunstler < millicentkunstler@...> wrote: > Hi, > > I was reading about the N epidemic and they were saying it comes out of the > 70s Me generation stuff. Makes sense. > > > > > > > > > > > Last night I was reminiscing with fiance about some of my childhood > > friends. > > I realized the specific friend I was talking about, we'll call her L, had > a > > seriously messed up home life. Her father was a big time alcoholic and > her > > and her siblings were left to pretty much fend for themselves after their > > mom died. I thought it was kind of strange that nada would let me go play > > over there from such a young age given some of the stuff I did see when I > > was there. > > > > This got me thinking about other childhood friends. I had at least 3 > female > > friends in high school who were sexually abused by their fathers or step > > fathers. Another friend who's father molested her two older sisters for > > years before her mother did anything about it. Other friends with > > volatile/abusive home lives, etc. I had never really thought of all of > this > > before, but now looking back at it... it was a fu**ing epidemic of abuse! > > > > This really bothers me. I never like to hear other people have parents > > similar to or worse than my nada and I slowly learned about my friends' > > trials & tribulations as we grew up. I guess the thing with L's dad > didn't > > seem so weird/abnormal/neglectful because my own home life was so messed > > up. > > In some ways I envied her because they got little to no parental > > supervision. > > > > So what is the commonality between all of those families, besides all > > living > > in the same city? I guess it could have been socioeconomic factors or > > something like that, but certainly not every middle class to lower middle > > class family abuses their kids? > > > > I feel kind of angry about it; that so many of us had it really bad. And > > while I realize there is likely no one factor that would influence so > many > > different families in the same way that would cause them to abuse their > > kids, I am simply aghast that so many people my age who all grew up in > the > > same city had to deal with this kind of bull sh**. Like I said, it was an > > epidemic. > > > > Anyway, I just thought I'd share that because it hit me last night. > *sigh* > > > > Mia > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2011 Report Share Posted March 21, 2011 It turns out that several of the girls I knew from elementary school and high school were being molested by their father, or step-father, or brother(s) at home. I think the problem of incest has been an epidemic for a long time, its just that we weren't aware of it. That's one of the reasons I wish that there was a class called " emotional hygiene " that begins when children are in kindergarden that teaches them in age-appropriate ways (using film clips with actors) that its not OK for other people to hurt them, touch them, neglect them, bully them, and its OK to tell about it if it happens. -Annie > > > > > > > Last night I was reminiscing with fiance about some of my childhood > > friends. > > I realized the specific friend I was talking about, we'll call her L, had a > > seriously messed up home life. Her father was a big time alcoholic and her > > and her siblings were left to pretty much fend for themselves after their > > mom died. I thought it was kind of strange that nada would let me go play > > over there from such a young age given some of the stuff I did see when I > > was there. > > > > This got me thinking about other childhood friends. I had at least 3 female > > friends in high school who were sexually abused by their fathers or step > > fathers. Another friend who's father molested her two older sisters for > > years before her mother did anything about it. Other friends with > > volatile/abusive home lives, etc. I had never really thought of all of this > > before, but now looking back at it... it was a fu**ing epidemic of abuse! > > > > This really bothers me. I never like to hear other people have parents > > similar to or worse than my nada and I slowly learned about my friends' > > trials & tribulations as we grew up. I guess the thing with L's dad didn't > > seem so weird/abnormal/neglectful because my own home life was so messed > > up. > > In some ways I envied her because they got little to no parental > > supervision. > > > > So what is the commonality between all of those families, besides all > > living > > in the same city? I guess it could have been socioeconomic factors or > > something like that, but certainly not every middle class to lower middle > > class family abuses their kids? > > > > I feel kind of angry about it; that so many of us had it really bad. And > > while I realize there is likely no one factor that would influence so many > > different families in the same way that would cause them to abuse their > > kids, I am simply aghast that so many people my age who all grew up in the > > same city had to deal with this kind of bull sh**. Like I said, it was an > > epidemic. > > > > Anyway, I just thought I'd share that because it hit me last night. *sigh* > > > > Mia > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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