Guest guest Posted May 1, 2011 Report Share Posted May 1, 2011 I was doing really well dealing with my bpd dad and setting boundaries on his constant neediness to have me call, report every detail to him, and seem super happy while talking to him on the phone. I had cut down the phone calls to once every other day and I wasn't as affected by his blows. For some reason, I feel like I'm slipping. I called twice today, and then he called me about an hour ago. This is a lot, especially for an adult living on her own. He left me a message rambling about how I never want to talk to him, I don't have time, I'm too busy, etc. Even though I talked to him TWICE today. What is going on? Is he taking advantage of the fact that I have been communicating more? More importantly, how do I deal with the fact that I feel like I am slipping in terms of dealing with his behavior? I don't want things to go back to where I was always hurt by the way he talked to me and constantly needed me. Also, should I even mention the message he left me about not having time for him? I don't want to make it seem like what he did was okay, but I am absolutely SURE that next time I talk to him, he will be perfectly happy and not even mention the fact that I " never " call. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 1, 2011 Report Share Posted May 1, 2011 Oooh its so easy to get sucked back in isn't it! Does he have a therapist of some sort? I've taken to telling my mum, " ask your shrink " haha. Assuming he doesn't, i'm not sure. The last time dad (i don't know what he is in terms of mental problems, depressed i suppose) called me to complain about his girlfriend, i told his brother, basically 'dads girlfriend is a heartless bitch'. He was really mad that i dobbed his girlfriend in to his brother, i didn't mean to, but i was so worked up (dad has been ill & she is not looking after him properly) and my uncle just happened to call. They all have dinner together and stuff. But seriously, he should be telling an 'adult' not me! i'm his daughter! So stuff him. Maybe his brother should be worried about him. > > I was doing really well dealing with my bpd dad and setting boundaries on his constant neediness to have me call, report every detail to him, and seem super happy while talking to him on the phone. I had cut down the phone calls to once every other day and I wasn't as affected by his blows. For some reason, I feel like I'm slipping. I called twice today, and then he called me about an hour ago. This is a lot, especially for an adult living on her own. He left me a message rambling about how I never want to talk to him, I don't have time, I'm too busy, etc. Even though I talked to him TWICE today. What is going on? Is he taking advantage of the fact that I have been communicating more? > > More importantly, how do I deal with the fact that I feel like I am slipping in terms of dealing with his behavior? I don't want things to go back to where I was always hurt by the way he talked to me and constantly needed me. > > Also, should I even mention the message he left me about not having time for him? I don't want to make it seem like what he did was okay, but I am absolutely SURE that next time I talk to him, he will be perfectly happy and not even mention the fact that I " never " call. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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