Outwit, Outlast, Outplay! Happy Mother's Day!

May 8, 2011

This is always a day of, " Emotional Survivor " for the KO crowd... all sorts of

conflicted " what do I do " , " what do I not do " , " how big of an %@#$ will I be " ,

" do I care? " etc. etc. etc.

It's a real FUN FEST and their " ain't no Redemption Island " til after midnight

;o)

Here is my chosen coping plan for the day: (just in case ya'll wanna take tips.)

I refuse to be stuck in a restaurant/car/theater/shopping 'thing' with Nada.

These events seem to bring out here " treat daughter like crap because I'm

ENTITLED to " feelings.... nope, not gonna happen anymore.

This year she's many hours away. And pouting. Oh well. BUT... to clear my

conscious and actually 'play nice' I found something to 'get her' that will be

interesting to her and not put me in 'a place.' eGift Cards. I was going to

just send flowers and was looking at them when teen came in and said, " why on

earth would you spend $90 for flowers that are going to DIE? " Hmmmm.... good

point. So I took that money, bought a couple of eGift cards and plopped them in

her email inbox. Issue solved. She gets 'stuff' and gets to shop and play

pamper teenage princess and I get to know I did " something " but I didn't lose my

soul. That's the whole point. Phew.

I wish it wasn't like this. I really, really wish I had a mother that I I

didn't have to think in defensive terms with... but every time I put my neck

out even a bit, she bites it. That's not cool. So while I'm saddened by that

reality, I realize now that I'd no more put my neck out with her than I would

stick my head in the lions cage at the zoo. The lion is going to do what lions

do... and so it is the BPD mother.

Happy M day for those who don't bite!

Lynnette

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