I don't know what happened

[Guest guest]

So I proposed that I would write a letter to my waif boss and get out all the

things that I'm pissed off about, but something happened. I stopped caring. So

she's a back-stabbing, two-faced bitch? So what? I figured out that I needed to

get out of here, and I did. And not only did I find a great job in a great new

city/state, but I went there last week and settled housing and got a great new

place that's a million times better than where I live now. I love everything

about my new home (I leave LA next week to officially move), and frankly, I

could care less about her bullshit.

I've been making my way through Codependent No More, and it's been very helpful

in being able to spot those behaviors that drag me into the co-dependency dance.

I'm learning not to take responsibility for other people's feelings. I am still

angry about some of the things she did, and I think that's okay. That anger is

functioning as a warning mechanism now to not get drawn into her bullshit or

anyone else's.

It's funny, I had been angry about all these things with her, but when I finally

found out from my source in HR what a back-stabbing, two-faced bitch she was,

for a day I was furious, but then all of a sudden the clarity I had, the new

perspective, that she was not an ally but instead was a wolf in sheep's clothing

gave me a strange sort of peace.

She's not my friend. She's not even really my boss anymore; I'm only still here

to cover her ass on a couple of projects. In fact, I'm basically doing her a

favor. So why should I care what she thinks...about anything? I'm not

responsible for her feelings either. She behaved horribly to me, and is still

acting all butt-hurt because I refused to allow her to get away with it. So if

she wants to give me the silent treatment, that's fine with me. It's not

upsetting me or making me crazy or anything. If anything, it's extremely

humorous because this grown woman is acting like a child in a professional

setting. It's so very unprofessional, and it's funny to me because she is always

so high and mighty about how professional she thinks she is.

I don't know, it's like some light switch clicked on that is allowing me not to

take her behavior personally, which I would have done in the past.

Anyways, I am a little sad that it looks like I won't be able to continue on

having a friendship with her after I leave--and this is just by her behavior. Of

course, at this point, considering that I've discovered her dual nature, I don't

necessarily want one. But I am grieving a little over the loss of a friendship I

thought I had. And that's okay. I'm allowed to be sad. I'm not crying over it,

it's just a little regretful.

I do hope someday she gets some therapeutic help and can see the things about

herself that I see. But I can only control me.

[Guest guest]

that's such a great feeling, when you can separate your feelings from reality

and not get swept up in another person's craziness.

The bonus is, it kills them!!

congrats on your new job and move! woo hoo!!