CAIT..Re: Warning DNR if depressed

[Guest guest]

Hi Cait,......I can relate to the depression too, as I've been battling it on and off for awhile now. Seems like circumstances keep getting me down, and before I could just pick myself up and get over it. I've been falling asleep at my computer, and haven't been out of my house in over a year. Someone asked if I was agoraphobic, and I said no, its just that I need help and theres no one around to help me. So I stay at a desk all day and with the TV in the foreground, watch my shows and play games or e-mail on the computer. After awhile it gets old. Then its easy to start thinking about ALL the things I used to be able to do, and who wouldn't feel depressed when you no longer are able to do them? You can look for alternatives, but it doesn't take the place of some of the things you really liked to do.

This illness or any chronic illness is a constant adjustment daily just to survive it, and I think there will always be times when we mourn for our losses.

I asked a neurologist once why I felt so bad all the time, and she said: "MS is a shitty disease" her words not mine, but I agree nontheless.

I'm sorry about you and your daughter. I'm going thru something with my son right now, and its heartbreaking. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I have a little bit of incontinence too, mostly while I sleep, but sometimes during the day. This has been increasing for about a year now, and I can't even do those exercises because I have no feeling in that area or the muscle action to do them.

I'm sorry for all you are going thru, but glad you shared.

Hugs and Love, Jackie

May the peace of God be with you...the love of Jesus enfold you...and the Spirit of Christ fill you.

Subject: Warning DNR if depressedTo: MSersLife Date: Wednesday, November 3, 2010, 11:40 AM

Sorry I've been so quiet but I've not been feeling very well for the last month or two. Also am just getting over a bout of ON which for me, makes reading and writing impossible. Its like double vision except with stain glassed windows with cracks of piercing painful light rays passing through.

And fatigue ... I've had days when I've literally slept 20 out of 24 hours. And of course not been eating right, etc. Add to that I've finally admitted I've downright depressed and worried about money ... this house is like a ? (forget the word) on my back and I don't have the $'s to finish the upgrades to sell it. has offered to lend me some money which I'd repay when it sold but I keep remembering my mother's words "never lend to a friend or relative". I felt really bad but I had to borrow enough to pay this month's mortgage.

I look around at all the 'things that have to be done' and I get so down that so many of them are things I used to be able to do with no thought. Like hanging new verticals on the empty patio door, etc. I'm worried about ... his back condition is degenerating and his neck has been really bad lately despite chiropractic and acupuncture.

Today is my middle daughter's 34th BD and it's been 10 yrs since we've spoken. And I'm feeling twinges of the old agoraphobia since I'm so stuck in the house. And last one, my mobility is getting worse as in the incontinence . I used to do the Kiegels regularly but it's like there's no feeling anymore. Sorry maybe TMI

Sorry for all 'babble'. I was not going to mention it all but not mentioning it feels wrong. I think of you all and to any newcomers, a big hello from NW Ontario, Canada. Hopefully I'll get a chance to wade through my 6000+emails ... why do I still stay in stitching groups when I haven't picked up a needle in ages! ... hugs, Cait