Puns for educated minds

[Guest guest]

Puns for educated minds Puns for Educated Minds 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was SirCumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, becauseit was a weapon of math

disruption. 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still bestationery. 6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited forlittering. 7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result inLinoleum Blownapart. 8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to

the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' 13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hitme. 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off theGrass.' 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 17. A backward poet writes inverse. 18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it'syour count that votes. 19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. 21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed perpassenger.' 22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other andsays 'Dam!' 23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a firein the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can'thave your kayak and heat it too. 24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' Theother says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' 25. Did

you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during aroot canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. 26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

[Guest guest]

roflmhoMy favorite:24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' Theother

says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSers Life egroup <MSersLife >Sent: Thu, November 4, 2010 4:28:00 PMSubject: Puns for educated minds

Puns for educated minds Puns for Educated Minds 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was SirCumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, becauseit was a weapon of math

disruption. 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still bestationery. 6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited forlittering. 7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result inLinoleum Blownapart. 8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to

the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' 13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hitme. 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off theGrass.' 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 17. A backward poet writes inverse. 18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it'syour count that votes. 19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. 21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed perpassenger.' 22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other andsays 'Dam!' 23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a firein the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can'thave your kayak and heat it too. 24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' Theother says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' 25. Did

you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during aroot canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. 26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

[Guest guest]

I was shocked when I got it - my big brother doesn't understand most jokes I have sent - he still surprizes me - almost 43 years God, grant me the strength of eagles wings, the faith and courage to fly to new heights, and the wisdom to rely on his spirit to carry me there.

To: MSersLife Sent: Thu, November 4, 2010 10:26:36 PMSubject: Re: Puns for educated minds

roflmhoMy favorite:24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' Theother says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'

SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects.

To: MSers Life egroup <MSersLife >Sent: Thu, November 4, 2010 4:28:00 PMSubject: Puns for educated minds

Puns for educated minds Puns for Educated Minds 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was SirCumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, becauseit was a weapon of math

disruption. 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still bestationery. 6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited forlittering. 7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result inLinoleum Blownapart. 8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to

the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' 13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hitme. 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off theGrass.' 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 17. A backward poet writes inverse. 18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it'syour count that votes. 19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. 21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed perpassenger.' 22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other andsays 'Dam!' 23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a firein the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can'thave your kayak and heat it too. 24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' Theother says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' 25. Did

you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during aroot canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. 26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.