A Shout-Out to Fellow NC-ers

[Guest guest]

Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it over, I

wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than never! :-)

At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some " dog "

holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with scintillating manners

and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO. Then I learned to embrace

holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook and events that I wanted to

do--as simple as writing in my diary while my little guesthouse was lit with

candles--that kind of thing.

This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she has 14

guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes, I

volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her house.

She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and good

conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant 23-pound bird

defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping for the remaining

stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want a big picture with me

and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving turkey.

I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big family event

again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so grateful. This was

what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards for half a decade, and

now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally, to feel useful at the center

of a large, warm family is a rare and priceless gift. Maybe everybody can't

understand it. The best way I can compare it is if a fireman dreams of rescuing

people from a burning buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish holiday

dinner for a family I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that make sense?

Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it can

happen to anyone.

Joy and blessings,

AFB

[Guest guest]

Hi AFB,

I am so happy for you that you are looking forward to your dream Thanksgiving.

I hope all goes well and you have an enjoyable and relaxing day. I am having my

Thanksgiving at my home away from my FOO for the first time ever in my life. It

is a mixed bag of feelings that comes with that. I feel the loss, yet I am

looking forward to it being just my boyfriend and children and no stress or

drama. Not having to worry about people ignoring me or someone I care about,

walking on eggshells and just being stressed out in general. I am not NC, just

LC. It is a miracle that I managed to plan the holiday the way I wanted.

Have a great day Thursday and thank you for the inspiring message.

Lyn

>

> Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it over, I

wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than never! :-)

>

> At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some " dog "

holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with scintillating manners

and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO. Then I learned to embrace

holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook and events that I wanted to

do--as simple as writing in my diary while my little guesthouse was lit with

candles--that kind of thing.

>

> This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she has 14

guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes, I

volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her house.

She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and good

conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant 23-pound bird

defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping for the remaining

stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want a big picture with me

and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving turkey.

>

> I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big family

event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so grateful. This

was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards for half a decade,

and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally, to feel useful at the

center of a large, warm family is a rare and priceless gift. Maybe everybody

can't understand it. The best way I can compare it is if a fireman dreams of

rescuing people from a burning buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish

holiday dinner for a family I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that

make sense?

>

> Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it can

happen to anyone.

> Joy and blessings,

> AFB

>

[Guest guest]

AFB, I'm so happy for you. Enjoy your thanksgiving. I admire your journey and I

think you're courageous.

Hugs,

Fiona

>

> Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it over, I

wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than never! :-)

>

> At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some " dog "

holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with scintillating manners

and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO. Then I learned to embrace

holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook and events that I wanted to

do--as simple as writing in my diary while my little guesthouse was lit with

candles--that kind of thing.

>

> This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she has 14

guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes, I

volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her house.

She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and good

conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant 23-pound bird

defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping for the remaining

stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want a big picture with me

and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving turkey.

>

> I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big family

event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so grateful. This

was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards for half a decade,

and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally, to feel useful at the

center of a large, warm family is a rare and priceless gift. Maybe everybody

can't understand it. The best way I can compare it is if a fireman dreams of

rescuing people from a burning buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish

holiday dinner for a family I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that

make sense?

>

> Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it can

happen to anyone.

> Joy and blessings,

> AFB

>

[Guest guest]

Wow AFB - my Thanksgiving just got a little brighter after reading your post.

My hubby and I are spending this one completely alone and I feel thrilled and

pitiful all at the same time, but what you said makes me think of doing

Thanksgiving the way I want to do it in the future. I love your idea and can

think of a few families I would do this for. Anyway - it's just a great idea

and I will think of you buzzing around your kitchen cooking a fabulous meal for

people who will appreciate it. Good for you!

ps- good luck transporting it - yikes.

Tag

>

> Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it over, I

wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than never! :-)

>

> At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some " dog "

holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with scintillating manners

and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO. Then I learned to embrace

holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook and events that I wanted to

do--as simple as writing in my diary while my little guesthouse was lit with

candles--that kind of thing.

>

> This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she has 14

guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes, I

volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her house.

She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and good

conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant 23-pound bird

defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping for the remaining

stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want a big picture with me

and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving turkey.

>

> I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big family

event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so grateful. This

was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards for half a decade,

and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally, to feel useful at the

center of a large, warm family is a rare and priceless gift. Maybe everybody

can't understand it. The best way I can compare it is if a fireman dreams of

rescuing people from a burning buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish

holiday dinner for a family I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that

make sense?

>

> Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it can

happen to anyone.

> Joy and blessings,

> AFB

>

[Guest guest]

Hi All and Also Tag, Fiona and Lyn who wrote sent encouragement and honesty. Big

Bird is browning in the oven, stuffed to bursting and bathing in wine and herbs.

I sent a text message to my hostess just to let her know that everything is on

schedule and she texted back a cheery hello. Imagine guys: no angst, no

pestering, no hysteria. The PAYOFF of NC is HERE. Boy am I rolling in it,

splashing in it, feeling THANKFUL for it.

I just have a little oven and the turkey is so big that the door doesn't shut

tight. So I found a bungee cord and bungeed the door tight. Then I texted the

photo to pals who all laughed at my " redneck " technology. HA! Nothing will

defeat me and my bird!

I have my clothes laid out, my car seats all ready for transporting Big Bird,

gravy and stuffing. The only thing that may prove problematic is carrying it in

high heels. Hmmm, just thought of something. I have a rolling cooler. It keeps

things cold or hot. I could put the bird in it and ROLL Big Bird. That's

probably the best answer, plus it keep Big Bird hot and toasty.

SOLUTIONS PEOPLE! Onward to NC Thanksgiving and beyond...

Wishing you all a soothing holiday, a peaceful heart,

AFB

> >

> > Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it over, I

wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than never! :-)

> >

> > At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some " dog "

holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with scintillating manners

and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO. Then I learned to embrace

holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook and events that I wanted to

do--as simple as writing in my diary while my little guesthouse was lit with

candles--that kind of thing.

> >

> > This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she has

14 guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes, I

volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her house.

She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and good

conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant 23-pound bird

defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping for the remaining

stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want a big picture with me

and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving turkey.

> >

> > I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big family

event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so grateful. This

was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards for half a decade,

and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally, to feel useful at the

center of a large, warm family is a rare and priceless gift. Maybe everybody

can't understand it. The best way I can compare it is if a fireman dreams of

rescuing people from a burning buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish

holiday dinner for a family I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that

make sense?

> >

> > Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it can

happen to anyone.

> > Joy and blessings,

> > AFB

> >

>

[Guest guest]

awesome!!!! Happy thanksgiving!!!!!!

On Thu, Nov 24, 2011 at 12:28 PM, awayfromborderland <

awayfromborderland@...> wrote:

> **

>

>

> Hi All and Also Tag, Fiona and Lyn who wrote sent encouragement and

> honesty. Big Bird is browning in the oven, stuffed to bursting and bathing

> in wine and herbs. I sent a text message to my hostess just to let her know

> that everything is on schedule and she texted back a cheery hello. Imagine

> guys: no angst, no pestering, no hysteria. The PAYOFF of NC is HERE. Boy am

> I rolling in it, splashing in it, feeling THANKFUL for it.

>

> I just have a little oven and the turkey is so big that the door doesn't

> shut tight. So I found a bungee cord and bungeed the door tight. Then I

> texted the photo to pals who all laughed at my " redneck " technology. HA!

> Nothing will defeat me and my bird!

>

> I have my clothes laid out, my car seats all ready for transporting Big

> Bird, gravy and stuffing. The only thing that may prove problematic is

> carrying it in high heels. Hmmm, just thought of something. I have a

> rolling cooler. It keeps things cold or hot. I could put the bird in it and

> ROLL Big Bird. That's probably the best answer, plus it keep Big Bird hot

> and toasty.

>

> SOLUTIONS PEOPLE! Onward to NC Thanksgiving and beyond...

> Wishing you all a soothing holiday, a peaceful heart,

> AFB

>

>

>

> > >

> > > Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it

> over, I wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than

> never! :-)

> > >

> > > At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some

> " dog " holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with

> scintillating manners and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO.

> Then I learned to embrace holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook

> and events that I wanted to do--as simple as writing in my diary while my

> little guesthouse was lit with candles--that kind of thing.

> > >

> > > This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she

> has 14 guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes,

> I volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her

> house. She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and

> good conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant

> 23-pound bird defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping

> for the remaining stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want

> a big picture with me and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving

> turkey.

> > >

> > > I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big

> family event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so

> grateful. This was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards

> for half a decade, and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally,

> to feel useful at the center of a large, warm family is a rare and

> priceless gift. Maybe everybody can't understand it. The best way I can

> compare it is if a fireman dreams of rescuing people from a burning

> buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish holiday dinner for a family

> I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that make sense?

> > >

> > > Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it

> can happen to anyone.

> > > Joy and blessings,

> > > AFB

> > >

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Girlscout, thanks so much. Here's the last installment. of my NC

Thanksgiving:

The turkey transported easily and when I got to my pal's she sent troops out to

help with lugging the turkey into her place. The meal was terrific thanks to all

the sides everyone else had prepared and I got a lot of compliments for the

turkey. Lively conversation ensued for the evening and although there were a few

" political hand grenades " thrown in, nobody took the bait and controversy was

swept away in the general flow of talk. When an event is dominated by mentally

healthy people, everybody works to downplay drama and boost the happy chatter

and the laughs. I could see it working in the room. My heavy turkey was re-named

Hernia Bird and we all had big laughs over that.

Here I am on Friday morning. I am remembering the wonderful evening, feeling

closer to everyone and looking forward to next year, when I want to try a

25-pound bird. Instead of being exhausted from the holiday and the mental

weightlifting that goes with PD parents, I'm energized, I'm uplifted. A couple

of times my mind turned to my FOO and the pain of past failed holidays, but I

soon realized that allowing that to occupy my mind was the wrong direction and a

drain on my happiness. I switched focus to the present and avoided the past. I

stayed happy the whole day.

Back when I first went NC I had no idea if there was going to be a light at the

end of the tunnel. All I knew was I had to stop this suffering going on at every

holiday. Now, the reward is here. I " made it " to higher ground and shelter where

people are healthy and consciously working to keep things that way. It's no

accident that the event was PD-free. It was consciously designed that way, even

though my hostess may not have had the words to describe it that way.

Thanks for listening to my NC success,

AFB

> > > >

> > > > Hello Fellow KOs, I've been NC for half a decade now, and looking it

> > over, I wish I could say NC for the last 40 years but better late than

> > never! :-)

> > > >

> > > > At first, I struggled with holidays. I felt the loss. I spent some

> > " dog " holidays with strangers who, while not thrilling me with

> > scintillating manners and friendliness, at least were better than my FOO.

> > Then I learned to embrace holidays by myself. I planned good food to cook

> > and events that I wanted to do--as simple as writing in my diary while my

> > little guesthouse was lit with candles--that kind of thing.

> > > >

> > > > This year has finally turned the corner. A pal is beyond busy. But she

> > has 14 guests slated for Thanksgiving. Not thinking she would ever say yes,

> > I volunteered to cook the turkey, stuffing and gravy and bring it to her

> > house. She said YES! I know this family and they are warm, welcoming, and

> > good conversationalists--a dream family. I'm so excited. I have a giant

> > 23-pound bird defrosting in my frig right now and today I will be shopping

> > for the remaining stuffing ingredients. I'm taking my camera because I want

> > a big picture with me and all the guests and my gigantic Thanksgiving

> > turkey.

> > > >

> > > > I tell this story because I never thought I'd get to cook for a big

> > family event again. This is a personal gift from God to me and I'm so

> > grateful. This was what I always dreamed of, what I've been working towards

> > for half a decade, and now a new Thanksgiving is here. For me personally,

> > to feel useful at the center of a large, warm family is a rare and

> > priceless gift. Maybe everybody can't understand it. The best way I can

> > compare it is if a fireman dreams of rescuing people from a burning

> > buildings, one of my dreams is to cook a lavish holiday dinner for a family

> > I can trust and feel comfortable with. Does that make sense?

> > > >

> > > > Going NC DOES offer rich gifts and rewards. If it can happen to me, it

> > can happen to anyone.

> > > > Joy and blessings,

> > > > AFB

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>