Study on narcissistic pd: they know they're arrogant

[Guest guest]

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21604895

You probably think this paper's about you: Narcissists' perceptions of their

personality and reputation.

Carlson EN, Vazire S, Oltmanns TF.

Abstract

Do narcissists have insight into the negative aspects of their personality and

reputation? Using both clinical and subclinical measures of narcissism, the

authors examined others' perceptions, self-perceptions, and meta-perceptions of

narcissists across a wide range of traits for a new acquaintance and close other

(Study 1), longitudinally with a group of new acquaintances (Study 2), and among

coworkers (Study 3). Results bring 3 surprising conclusions about narcissists:

(a) they understand that others see them less positively than they see

themselves (i.e., their meta-perceptions are less biased than are their

self-perceptions), ( they have some insight into the fact that they make

positive first impressions that deteriorate over time, and © they have insight

into their narcissistic personality (e.g., they describe themselves as

arrogant). These findings shed light on some of the psychological mechanisms

underlying narcissism. (PsycINFO Database Record © 2011 APA, all rights

reserved).

PMID:

21604895

[PubMed - as supplied by publisher]

At the ACON support group (Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents) the member

who posted this speculated that perhaps npd behavior is like addict behavior:

those with narcissistic pd are quite aware, apparently, that they're doing

something bad, behaving in ways that hurt themselves and other people, but they

do it anyway because they're getting a " high " off of their bullying, superior

behaviors, getting a kick out of being arrogant, demanding, controlling and

abusive.

(Which is creepily similar to what I've read about those with psychopathic

behaviors: those with psychopathy hurt people sometimes simply because they are

freaking *bored* and have nothing better to do, like a cat slowly torturing a

mouse to death.)

So, in the same way that we try to avoid enabling and rewarding self-destructive

behaviors in addicts, we need to avoid rewarding and enabling similar self- and

other-destructive behaviors in the personality-disordered.

Catering to them and deferring to them is not helping them achieve

self-awareness and is not motivating them to change their toxic behaviors.

Its food for thought, anyway.

-Annie

[Guest guest]

Annie--

(Excerpted quote below), I've been saying this for years! I believe it's

actually a *more ethical and loving choice to choose not to help narcissists and

borderlines behave destructively.

Charlotte

>

> So, in the same way that we try to avoid enabling and rewarding

self-destructive behaviors in addicts, we need to avoid rewarding and enabling

similar self- and other-destructive behaviors in the personality-disordered.

>

> Catering to them and deferring to them is not helping them achieve

self-awareness and is not motivating them to change their toxic behaviors.

>

> Its food for thought, anyway.

>

> -Annie

>

[Guest guest]

I'm on board with ya, Sistah! You've been right about this, and now it seems

the researchers are coming on board also.

-Annie

> >

>

> > So, in the same way that we try to avoid enabling and rewarding

self-destructive behaviors in addicts, we need to avoid rewarding and enabling

similar self- and other-destructive behaviors in the personality-disordered.

> >

> > Catering to them and deferring to them is not helping them achieve

self-awareness and is not motivating them to change their toxic behaviors.

> >

> > Its food for thought, anyway.

> >

> > -Annie

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hee, thanks Annie! It's the complicated layers of this dynamic that continue to

baffle me. On the one hand, NPDs/BPDs need to know and believe that they are

hurting their prey, so that they can get the addictive 'buzz' of doing so. I

once remember my nada saying with her crazy-gleam, quite giddy, 'I got to your

Daddy.' What she meant by that was that she had noticeably disturbed him, to

the point where he reacted to her, when she made inappropriate and derisive

comments about his dead father. And we all know that nadas will push and push

until they get a rise out of you--they need to *see a result of their abuse.

Yet at the same time they are desperate to 'mask' what they do from themselves.

And of course, others, and us! We all are familiar with nadas' intense

projections--they say or do something abusive intentionally and then, with all

their heart, energy, being, and apparent BELIEF, they project that action onto

the KO. They act mean, they call you mean; they act irresponsible, they make

you so.

This is really confusing. They need to see a result and enjoy that they've

caused it. It's an addiction. But they need to deny that they've caused it and

say YOU have caused it. And that's a survival mechanism, so they don't have to

split themselves black. How the two of these interplay, and they experience the

two realities at once...it has to be some kindof evil genius. It's tremendously

difficult to explain to those without extensive knowledge of the Cluster B

phenomenon. Obviously the addiction to harm wins out time after time--at least

it did with both my nada & Annie's. Maybe it's different for the waifs,

histrionics, nadas with less NPD in them. I'm not sure. I do know that I've

yet to fully make sense of this dichotomy.

--Charlie

> > >

> >

> > > So, in the same way that we try to avoid enabling and rewarding

self-destructive behaviors in addicts, we need to avoid rewarding and enabling

similar self- and other-destructive behaviors in the personality-disordered.

> > >

> > > Catering to them and deferring to them is not helping them achieve

self-awareness and is not motivating them to change their toxic behaviors.

> > >

> > > Its food for thought, anyway.

> > >

> > > -Annie

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Wow! Thanks for sharing that, Annie. It's very timely -

Blessings,

Karla

>

> http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21604895

>

> You probably think this paper's about you: Narcissists' perceptions of their

personality and reputation.

> Carlson EN, Vazire S, Oltmanns TF.

> Abstract

>

> Do narcissists have insight into the negative aspects of their personality and

reputation? Using both clinical and subclinical measures of narcissism, the

authors examined others' perceptions, self-perceptions, and meta-perceptions of

narcissists across a wide range of traits for a new acquaintance and close other

(Study 1), longitudinally with a group of new acquaintances (Study 2), and among

coworkers (Study 3). Results bring 3 surprising conclusions about narcissists:

(a) they understand that others see them less positively than they see

themselves (i.e., their meta-perceptions are less biased than are their

self-perceptions), ( they have some insight into the fact that they make

positive first impressions that deteriorate over time, and © they have insight

into their narcissistic personality (e.g., they describe themselves as

arrogant). These findings shed light on some of the psychological mechanisms

underlying narcissism. (PsycINFO Database Record © 2011 APA, all rights

reserved).

>

> PMID:

> 21604895

> [PubMed - as supplied by publisher]

>

> At the ACON support group (Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents) the member

who posted this speculated that perhaps npd behavior is like addict behavior:

those with narcissistic pd are quite aware, apparently, that they're doing

something bad, behaving in ways that hurt themselves and other people, but they

do it anyway because they're getting a " high " off of their bullying, superior

behaviors, getting a kick out of being arrogant, demanding, controlling and

abusive.

>

> (Which is creepily similar to what I've read about those with psychopathic

behaviors: those with psychopathy hurt people sometimes simply because they are

freaking *bored* and have nothing better to do, like a cat slowly torturing a

mouse to death.)

>

> So, in the same way that we try to avoid enabling and rewarding

self-destructive behaviors in addicts, we need to avoid rewarding and enabling

similar self- and other-destructive behaviors in the personality-disordered.

>

> Catering to them and deferring to them is not helping them achieve

self-awareness and is not motivating them to change their toxic behaviors.

>

> Its food for thought, anyway.

>

> -Annie

>