Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 OMG!!! Well, I'd for sure start by letting the insurance company know it is a forgery and see what they recommend. Maybe it can void the policy. Maybe she will go to jail!!! YA!!! On Mon, Jun 13, 2011 at 6:26 PM, greengoldfish77 wrote: > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance > policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary > of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the > policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the > policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian > can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to > sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what > the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the > policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right > AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't > trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the > police! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 That's a pretty serious criminal act, forging someone else's signature on an insurance policy. I'm not sure but I think that's a federal offense, meaning she's not breaking state laws but federal laws. I'd first be sure to let your husband know exactly what his mother did and how serious a crime that is. Then, the two of you get on the same page with how you choose to handle it. I'd say that if you choose to pursue criminal prosecution, this could put her in the federal pen for a good long time. Or, maybe it would be a good opportunity to have her get some serious psychiatric treatment at a residential facility for a couple of years. But I think that bottom-line, this is not something that should be swept under the rug, minimized and forgotten. Your husband's mother has proven that she can't be trusted, and I hate to go to the worst-case scenario in speculating that she was actually planning to harm your baby and then benefit from it. You can't know for sure if she was actually thinking or intending that. What she did actually do, though: forging your signature and attempting insurance fraud IS quite serious in and of itself and needs to be dealt with on a very serious level. In my opinion. -Annie > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 I'm with Annie. Even though it's immediate family, you should still let the insurance company know about the fraud. It's a serious offense, and need to be dealt with seriously. It does carry the fear that she might harm the baby just to benefit from the policy, which is extremely scary to me, and I'm not even the mommy! So you have every right to be freaked out. Get with your husband about this, and call the insurance company and let them know about the fraud ASAP. On Mon, Jun 13, 2011 at 8:50 PM, anuria67854 wrote: > > > That's a pretty serious criminal act, forging someone else's signature on > an insurance policy. I'm not sure but I think that's a federal offense, > meaning she's not breaking state laws but federal laws. > > I'd first be sure to let your husband know exactly what his mother did and > how serious a crime that is. Then, the two of you get on the same page with > how you choose to handle it. > > I'd say that if you choose to pursue criminal prosecution, this could put > her in the federal pen for a good long time. > > Or, maybe it would be a good opportunity to have her get some serious > psychiatric treatment at a residential facility for a couple of years. > > But I think that bottom-line, this is not something that should be swept > under the rug, minimized and forgotten. Your husband's mother has proven > that she can't be trusted, and I hate to go to the worst-case scenario in > speculating that she was actually planning to harm your baby and then > benefit from it. You can't know for sure if she was actually thinking or > intending that. > > What she did actually do, though: forging your signature and attempting > insurance fraud IS quite serious in and of itself and needs to be dealt with > on a very serious level. > > In my opinion. > > -Annie > > > > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance > policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary > of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the > policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the > policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian > can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to > sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what > the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the > policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right > AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't > trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the > police! > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 Here's a link to a site about fraud: http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-felony-fraud.htm Depending on the jurisdiction and the amount of money involved, forging someone's signature on a life insurance policy could constitute felony fraud. Oooo, nada-in-law could be a felon! So, yes, please do bring your husband up to speed on what his mommy dearest has been up to, and perhaps consult with a lawyer or a doctor about what would be the best way to proceed in this matter. I'd negotiate to get nada-in-law some serious psychiatric treatment over this behavior if nothing else, plus maintain a strict " supervised visitation only " nada-in-law policy of your own, for the forseeable future. -Annie > > > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance > > policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary > > of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the > > policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the > > policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian > > can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to > > sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what > > the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the > > policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right > > AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't > > trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the > > police! > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2011 Report Share Posted June 13, 2011 As far as her forging your signature, while this IS fraud, many jurisdictions do not go after family members who do it--they are usually loath to get into domestic disputes. I would definitely let the insurance company know that you did not sign the contract--and make sure you and your husband let nada-in-law know the contract has been invalidated. I do not know your family situation, but as a mother I would feel very threatened that this individual may wish harm my child. This is worst case scenario. It may be that she is just stupid about how her actions look to sane people--nadas are not known for stellar reasoning abilities after all. But unless she is willing to see how many ways she crossed lines, I'd be afraid to let her near the baby. I hope in the end you and your husband are able to resolve this from a mutual point of view. We really, really shouldn't have to deal with these situations that nadas create. You have my sympathy. scom, " greengoldfidh77 " wrote: > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2011 Report Share Posted June 14, 2011 Wow that is so messed up, it's beyond belief. You know, I was thinking later, after I read and replied to your post that usually life insurance companies are so by the book, that I couldn't imagine a company just handing a grandmother an insurance policy without the parents' involvement somehow. It really is creepy that she dared do that and creeps me to wonder where else she might forge your names out of " love " for her grandchildren. What was your husband's reaction? > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2011 Report Share Posted June 14, 2011 do you have anyone you can ask for legal advice? do you want her arrested? if you do then it doesn't matter, you should go ahead and tell the insurance agency it's a forged signature. then they can do whatever they usually do when someone denies making a signature on a policy, and she will find out third hand. if you want to give her a change to cancel the policy maybe you can get a letter sent to her by an attorney saying that if she doesn't cancel the policy within a certain period of time you are going to prosecute. that way she finds out from you what is going on and has a certain amount of time to nullify it. you could just tell her yourself that you want her to nullify the policy but I think being that the signature is a forgery, that isn't going to impress her much and she may do something even worse to retaliate. > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 Two words: holy Shiite! > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2011 Report Share Posted June 16, 2011 Thanks everyone for your responses and support! I helps to know my instincts are ok and I am NOT crazy... As of today I contacted the company and made a formal complaint. I am not too pleased with what they have told me. First of all I have to sign a statement that it isn't my signature. No problem. Then THEY decide if they'll cancel the policy AND if they do, Nada in law gets a refund?!! Also, they won't tell me if she has any other policies out in my name, my husband's or the baby's. THey WON'T investigate ANY of her other policies to see if they are illegal etc. They won't repremand the agent who sold her the policy AND they never contact the police. How do the Nada's of this world manage to get away with so much of the shit they pull????? Sorry, I am so exhausted, frightened angry and frustrated not to mention my PTSD is triggered as hell!!! As for my husband. While he is supportive, he is also a product of years of abuse.He has told me not to call police as this will cause " an atomic family meltdown " , asked me not to go nc with nada in law (I told him I was chosing not to put up with her abuse, but would support him having a relationship with her/his family)He thinks no contact would cause her to become more abusive and go on a much worse distortion campaign against me in our very small community. He has asked me to go to (their very frequent) family gatherings and be civil to her AND to " just ignore her abuse " because it will be so much worse if I don't. So here I sit, angry, feeling powerless (just like I did my whole childhood and teenage), jumping everytime I hear a car in the driveway. I realized today just how afraid my husband is of her. As for her distortion campaigns to date--keep in mind she's always nice and sweet to my face--this is the crap she has told people in the community/family: (None of this is true) that I gave my husband an STD, that I sleep around, that there is doubt he our baby's father, that I destroyed my husband's engagement with his ex-girlfriend-who was " perfect " (read worshiped Nada in law)(Nothing to do with me AND they were never engaged), that I cheated in the local art show and my picture I worked so hard on and won a prize with was a print I purchased...the list goes on and on. Sorry for venting so much, but I can't talk to anyone about this. THanks for reading. Greengoldfish > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2011 Report Share Posted June 16, 2011 Wow, that is an eye-opener on many levels, GGF. The following is just my own personal opinion; you are the only one who can decide what is the best thing to do in your own situation. First, I am astonished at the bizarre response from the insurance company RE your signature being forged! Whoever you spoke to most recently is contradicting what you were told earlier! You said you spoke with someone high up in the company the first time, who told you that grandparents can't be beneficiaries unless they are the legal guardian of the child, or something like that. At this point, I would NOT send this company anything with my legal signature on it, I don't think you can trust them. I would only contact them through my lawyer at this point. (Yes, I am the paranoid type.) Something just sounds very fishy to me. I suggest that if you want to pursue identity-theft and signature-fraud charges against nada-in-law and the insurance company (after all, they did not verify that that was indeed your signature on the document, did they!) you will have to get your own lawyer, and go about it from that direction. And I suggest that you go ahead and make a formal complaint with the police, there needs to be an official record with the authorities that your signature was forged, as the insurance company has basically blown you off and are being less than no help. Second, I am amazed and appalled at the extreme degree of character assassination your nada-in-law has engaged in against you. It appears to me that this woman truly loathes you. It seems she loathes her grandchild as well; she has basically called him a bastard. Claiming that her son is not the baby's father is the same as disowning and rejecting both you and the baby. That level of malignant hate is scary to me; I would never eat any food she has prepared, accept any gifts from her, or leave your child alone with her. That is just making all kinds of alarms bells and lights go off in my intuition. Again, keep in mind that I tend to be on the paranoid side. Third, I am even more appalled that your husband allows his mother to speak of his wife and his child in this shockingly insulting way and that he is too afraid of his mother to stand up to her. For me, personally, that would be a deep betrayal of loyalty on his part, and a deal-breaker. But, that's just me. Each of us has to decide for ourselves what we can and can't live with. I hope that at some point you and your husband and child can perhaps move far away from the small community you live in, far away from the mini-cult that his foo is sounding like, and make a complete break with this viper. Holy freaking cow! I feel for you; its not an easy or comfortable situation to be in at all. Here's wishing you strength, endurance, and very good luck with this situation. -Annie > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2011 Report Share Posted June 16, 2011 Living in a small town with nada running her mouth sounds crazy making. I am not surprised at the wall you ran into at the insurance company. Sad, isn't it? Just proves the old saying that rules only keep the honest people honest. > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2011 Report Share Posted June 16, 2011 I think contacting the insurance company is the right thing to do. If it helps you feel any better, if you called the police, they probably wouldn't do anything about it. Definitely don't leave your children alone with her. I would talk to a higher up in the insurance company because I think it is important to know if she has insurance out on anyone else. If you really want, a letter from a lawyer would get them to reconsider revealing that information to you. > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the police! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2011 Report Share Posted June 16, 2011 People with BPD have really* weird f*antasies. They concoct cockamamie " reality " scenarios in which they imagine convoluted interactions with others that most of us couldn't put together even on our most dysfunctional batsh*t crazy day. One and one do not necessarily make two in their world. Might, might not. Depends. Some times one and one can equal six, or blue, or an insulting man in a red overcoat. They do not make sense, however, this doesn't mean that they do not know what is real and what is not. *They are intentionally perverse as a means of control*. The main difference between someone with BPD, and a mentally ill individual is that the BPD *KNOWS* that their construct is untrue, but they seem to feel some kind of internal pressure to cause others around them to agree with their perverse story, and validate their proposed perception. A favorite tactic is the " truth bomb,' in which BPD attempts to devastate and control the other person with some previously unknown (and sometimes absurd) " truth " about them-self; In example, telling their child that the child is the product of " coerced sex, " was conceived in an " alien encounter, " or was involved in some horrendous childhood incident, which they,(the listener) has suppressed, and the BPD hoped they would *never* have to bring up, but must now, in the service of truth and mental health. Except that it is all a lie. In other words, in thier world, they will tell the truth, even if they have to lie to do it. They represent themselves as being privy to secret, personal information about others, and knows what everyone around her is really really thinks. You can't get anything by her, so you had better not try. But then, it doesn't really matter whether you try or not, because she'll know that you wanted to try, you thought about trying, and are secretly hostile and passive aggressive, and she is sick to death of " walking on egg shells " around you, and she knows what you are up to, and so do all her friends, so you had better watch your Ps and Qs! My Nada will also telegraph her bad intent, telling little " jokes " on herself, and being a little provocative and naughty. She took her shirt off in book-club, to show the " girls, " the youngest of whom is at least 65, the victorias secret bras my Dad had been buying her, and always manages to hold court, wherever she goes.People who don't know her are charmed by her off the wall honesty and frankness > > > > do you have anyone you can ask for legal advice? > > do you want her arrested? > > if you do then it doesn't matter, you should go ahead and tell the > insurance agency it's a forged signature. then they can do whatever they > usually do when someone denies making a signature on a policy, and she will > find out third hand. > > if you want to give her a change to cancel the policy maybe you can get a > letter sent to her by an attorney saying that if she doesn't cancel the > policy within a certain period of time you are going to prosecute. that way > she finds out from you what is going on and has a certain amount of time to > nullify it. > > you could just tell her yourself that you want her to nullify the policy > but I think being that the signature is a forgery, that isn't going to > impress her much and she may do something even worse to retaliate. > > > > > > > I posted earlier about my nada in law getting my son a life insurance > policy for his 1st birthday. I was bothered by the fact she was beneficiary > of $100,000. Thanks everyone for your comments...I sat down and looked the > policy over and called the insurance company head office. I found out the > policy is illegal as where I live a grandparent unless they are a guardian > can't be a beneficiary. I also found out as parents we would have had to > sign the policy and sign to confirm the medical information. Based on what > the individual at the head office told me, I looked at the back of the > policy. Low and behold-there is my signature. Except it doesn't look right > AND I KNOW I did not sign this (or anything else for nada in law as I don't > trust her).Any suggestions on where to go from here? I am ready to call the > police! > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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