Guest guest Posted December 7, 2011 Report Share Posted December 7, 2011 One of my latest theories is that BPD is actually Sensory Processing Disorder, which is not yet in the DSM but is currently being studied because so many autistic kids have it. Basically, this neorological disorder manifests as either your senses are undersensitive (meaning you need more touch than normal to feel it, for example) or oversensitive (loud noises are excruciatingly painful, can't stand tags in clothing, cigarette smoke makes you need to run away). If our senses are oversensitive, they will feel overloaded and therefore assaulted and will act out. To compensate, we become very controlling over our environment. If you think your nada is like thus, I highly recommend reading up on this. The literature I've read pertains to kids, but it's very possible that our nadas have this and have not developed the correct coping mechanisms, which means they lash out emotionally. What helps this disorder is occupational therapy and social skills groups. Because it's neurological, talk therapy can teach us and our nadas to recognize the symptoms and to head it off before the assault. Occupational therapists know so many tricks. For example, if you can't avoid going to loud places if your nada is oversensitive to noise, offer her noise canceling headphones. Encourage your nada to chew gum if she's undersensitive to touch. Keep soothing her with something that relaxes her, like fidget toys (pens to chew on, squeeze balls) or get a fish tank. > Hi, > > One of the books that has helped me the most, is Evil Genes, by Barbara > Oakley. Fantastic book! > Best of luck, Sunspot > > > >> ** >> >> >> >> I had the same experience my nada wanted(s) me to keep to a perfect little >> (tiny) range of emotions. she constantly berated me for " overreacting " >> whenever I responded to anything. she still sees me as incapable of real >> emotions because she sees me as so irrational. >> I think children are invalidating by nature I have 3. but I was carefully >> trained to be an expert doormat. I used to feel like I was in trouble 24/7. >> now I know she just wants control too bad for her I have a personality. >> >> >>>> >>>>> ** >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> Hello everyone, >>>>> I'm a new member, and my therapist recently recommended that I read >>>>> Understanding the Borderline Mother. I stayed up all night reading >> and I >>>>> cannot believe how accurate it is. I felt like I was reading my own >> diary. >>>>> It was insane how much truth was packed into one book. I couldn't >> believe >>>>> what I was reading. I had no idea anyone else could have experienced >> what I >>>>> went through, because it seems that no one wants to talk about it. >> Everyone >>>>> around me wants to pretend like the abusive relationship I survived >> with my >>>>> stepmother was OK. Almost normal, even. I've felt so worthless for >> so long, >>>>> and I have so much more pain to work through, but I feel like this >> book has >>>>> given me some hope. I'm not sure what the next step for me is. I will >>>>> probably read Stop Walking on Eggshells once I can get a copy from >> the >>>>> library. Any other book recommendations? >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 8, 2011 Report Share Posted December 8, 2011 My husband has sensory integration disorder (the old name, aka, Sensory Processing Disorder.) He's not autistic, but he is more intelligent than the average bear--was a gifted student and started college just before he turned 14. (Just sharing all this as a background). And while I understand where you're coming from with BPD being similar to SPD, I respectfully disagree. My husband is under/oversensitive with different things, and it is wholly different from BPD, judging from my experience and reading others' stories. While DH does control his environment, he controls only the part that directly affects him, and he knows he can't control other people. If something bothers him, he will speak up, and discuss it with others, so he and others can work out a solution. It's actually a physical sort of disorder with direct and understandable effects. BPD on the other hand, as we know, is a personality disorder. It is true that BPD people have difficulty integrating their emotions, and understanding the cause-effect of their actions and others' emotions. Because of this, they start being controlling and manipulative of other people and their environment, to make them feel better, but then they continue to feel like crap and start blaming others for not walking on eggshells in their " controlled " environment. And instead of talking it out normally, they tend to overreact and either lash out or retreat from the world, as a way of " conditioning " others, charging them with the task of making the BPD person better. So, when DH has a problem with an irritating environment, it's a logical problem. Tags=irritating=buy tagless clothes. He talks it out and takes it on himself to soothe his own environment, and responds in a measured way. My fada on the other hand, when he as a problem with an irritating environment, it is an illogical problem which lies entirely in his own emotions and perceptions thereof. My daughter isn't talkative=she hates me=disown her. He responded in an overreaction way, because it didn't occur to him that I might be busy with full time undergrad and two part time jobs, working 35+ hrs a week, and balancing friends, a bf, and my FOO, and might not have time to talk to them all the time. I can see SPD and BPD as a weak analogy, but certainly not anywhere to be the same thing. > ** > > > One of my latest theories is that BPD is actually Sensory Processing > Disorder, which is not yet in the DSM but is currently being studied > because so many autistic kids have it. Basically, this neorological > disorder manifests as either your senses are undersensitive (meaning you > need more touch than normal to feel it, for example) or oversensitive (loud > noises are excruciatingly painful, can't stand tags in clothing, cigarette > smoke makes you need to run away). If our senses are oversensitive, they > will feel overloaded and therefore assaulted and will act out. To > compensate, we become very controlling over our environment. > > If you think your nada is like thus, I highly recommend reading up on > this. The literature I've read pertains to kids, but it's very possible > that our nadas have this and have not developed the correct coping > mechanisms, which means they lash out emotionally. What helps this disorder > is occupational therapy and social skills groups. Because it's > neurological, talk therapy can teach us and our nadas to recognize the > symptoms and to head it off before the assault. > > Occupational therapists know so many tricks. For example, if you can't > avoid going to loud places if your nada is oversensitive to noise, offer > her noise canceling headphones. Encourage your nada to chew gum if she's > undersensitive to touch. Keep soothing her with something that relaxes her, > like fidget toys (pens to chew on, squeeze balls) or get a fish tank. > > > > > > > Hi, > > > > One of the books that has helped me the most, is Evil Genes, by Barbara > > Oakley. Fantastic book! > > Best of luck, Sunspot > > > > > > > >> ** > >> > >> > >> > >> I had the same experience my nada wanted(s) me to keep to a perfect > little > >> (tiny) range of emotions. she constantly berated me for " overreacting " > >> whenever I responded to anything. she still sees me as incapable of real > >> emotions because she sees me as so irrational. > >> I think children are invalidating by nature I have 3. but I was > carefully > >> trained to be an expert doormat. I used to feel like I was in trouble > 24/7. > >> now I know she just wants control too bad for her I have a personality. > >> > >> > >>>> > >>>>> ** > >>>>> > >>>>> > >>>>> Hello everyone, > >>>>> I'm a new member, and my therapist recently recommended that I read > >>>>> Understanding the Borderline Mother. I stayed up all night reading > >> and I > >>>>> cannot believe how accurate it is. I felt like I was reading my own > >> diary. > >>>>> It was insane how much truth was packed into one book. I couldn't > >> believe > >>>>> what I was reading. I had no idea anyone else could have experienced > >> what I > >>>>> went through, because it seems that no one wants to talk about it. > >> Everyone > >>>>> around me wants to pretend like the abusive relationship I survived > >> with my > >>>>> stepmother was OK. Almost normal, even. I've felt so worthless for > >> so long, > >>>>> and I have so much more pain to work through, but I feel like this > >> book has > >>>>> given me some hope. I'm not sure what the next step for me is. I will > >>>>> probably read Stop Walking on Eggshells once I can get a copy from > >> the > >>>>> library. Any other book recommendations? > >>>>> > >>>>> > >>>>> > >>>> > >>>> > >>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 8, 2011 Report Share Posted December 8, 2011 I don't see anything to make me think they're the same thing, but I can easily see how having Sensory Processing Disorder along with BPD could really aggravate BPD. I don't think that people with BPD are at all good at learning coping mechanisms of any sort, for other health issues, for work or social situations, or for anything else that doesn't go the way they want. At 02:48 AM 12/08/2011 Bpd wrote: >One of my latest theories is that BPD is actually Sensory >Processing Disorder, which is not yet in the DSM but is >currently being studied because so many autistic kids have it. >Basically, this neorological disorder manifests as either your >senses are undersensitive (meaning you need more touch than >normal to feel it, for example) or oversensitive (loud noises >are excruciatingly painful, can't stand tags in clothing, >cigarette smoke makes you need to run away). If our senses are >oversensitive, they will feel overloaded and therefore >assaulted and will act out. To compensate, we become very >controlling over our environment. > >If you think your nada is like thus, I highly recommend reading >up on this. The literature I've read pertains to kids, but it's >very possible that our nadas have this and have not developed >the correct coping mechanisms, which means they lash out >emotionally. What helps this disorder is occupational therapy >and social skills groups. Because it's neurological, talk >therapy can teach us and our nadas to recognize the symptoms >and to head it off before the assault. > >Occupational therapists know so many tricks. For example, if >you can't avoid going to loud places if your nada is >oversensitive to noise, offer her noise canceling headphones. >Encourage your nada to chew gum if she's undersensitive to >touch. Keep soothing her with something that relaxes her, like >fidget toys (pens to chew on, squeeze balls) or get a fish tank. > > -- Katrina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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