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I am (almost) free

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well, after a long 46-day coma due to an unexpected fall, Nada passed away. I

admit that it has not been easy: 20 days of ICU and then another 26 days of

hospital, doctors, nurses, tests, the funeral, and all.

Also a certain sadness that ensues, but... I feel relieved. I feel almost free

of nada's ghost.

More then a hundred people came to the funeral and almost all speaking so higly

of her. She was indeed very popular and, to the outside world, the perfect

mother/granmother/friend.

Every time the phone rings now, I still think it's her, but, then - oh what a

relief - I realize it is not. No more manipulations, no more mean remarks, no

more whining, no more insults.

I know it may sound callous, but I feel free.

peace.

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Good for you! Enjoy your freedom :-)

----------

Please excuse any typos or terseness, this message was sent from a mobile

device.

I am (almost) free

well, after a long 46-day coma due to an unexpected fall, Nada passed away. I

admit that it has not been easy: 20 days of ICU and then another 26 days of

hospital, doctors, nurses, tests, the funeral, and all.

Also a certain sadness that ensues, but... I feel relieved. I feel almost free

of nada's ghost.

More then a hundred people came to the funeral and almost all speaking so higly

of her. She was indeed very popular and, to the outside world, the perfect

mother/granmother/friend.

Every time the phone rings now, I still think it's her, but, then - oh what a

relief - I realize it is not. No more manipulations, no more mean remarks, no

more whining, no more insults.

I know it may sound callous, but I feel free.

peace.

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Thank you for sharing this with us. First, my thoughts are with you. Losing

one's mother can be a difficult passage to weather, even when she was an

abusive, mean parent. But I can totally relate to and empathize with your

feeling of relief. Its going to be a similar situation when my nada passes

away. She has been able to wear that charming, adorable mask in public and has

many friends, neighbors and our relatives who will attend her funeral and say

nice things about her. My relief and my grief will mingle together when that

happens.

I hope you will find peace and joy now.

-Annie

>

>

> well, after a long 46-day coma due to an unexpected fall, Nada passed away. I

admit that it has not been easy: 20 days of ICU and then another 26 days of

hospital, doctors, nurses, tests, the funeral, and all.

>

> Also a certain sadness that ensues, but... I feel relieved. I feel almost free

of nada's ghost.

>

> More then a hundred people came to the funeral and almost all speaking so

higly of her. She was indeed very popular and, to the outside world, the perfect

mother/granmother/friend.

>

> Every time the phone rings now, I still think it's her, but, then - oh what a

relief - I realize it is not. No more manipulations, no more mean remarks, no

more whining, no more insults.

>

> I know it may sound callous, but I feel free.

>

> peace.

>

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god bless, it sounds like it has been a horrible ordeal.

It must have been triggering to go to that funeral. I don't have any intention

of going when my dad passes away. i just can't do it...I can't stand there and

listen to people talk about how this or that he was. I know things that would

curl their hair.

she's free too. I often wonder what it is like for people who have done great

wrong after they passs...is there a period where they reflect and absorb the

harm they have caused...at least she is free from doing further harm. I believe

each person has a higher self and on some level they abuse their own souls by

harming others, and for those for whom it is compulsive, they are relieved when

it is finally over and they can cease the compulsive harm.

I love your handle 'survivingko'. That says so much. Sorry for your loss and

happy for your new found peace and freedom. Hugs.

>

>

> well, after a long 46-day coma due to an unexpected fall, Nada passed away. I

admit that it has not been easy: 20 days of ICU and then another 26 days of

hospital, doctors, nurses, tests, the funeral, and all.

>

> Also a certain sadness that ensues, but... I feel relieved. I feel almost free

of nada's ghost.

>

> More then a hundred people came to the funeral and almost all speaking so

higly of her. She was indeed very popular and, to the outside world, the perfect

mother/granmother/friend.

>

> Every time the phone rings now, I still think it's her, but, then - oh what a

relief - I realize it is not. No more manipulations, no more mean remarks, no

more whining, no more insults.

>

> I know it may sound callous, but I feel free.

>

> peace.

>

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I am sorry for your mother's passing; such an awful way to go; I can imagine all

the mixed emotions, you're feeling, etc. And so much time at the hospital; I'm

sure you're spent.

I can also imagine what you mean, and I don't think it's callous: when you're

harassed by someone and suffocated by their demands, it doesn't suck when it

stops.

>

>

> well, after a long 46-day coma due to an unexpected fall, Nada passed away. I

admit that it has not been easy: 20 days of ICU and then another 26 days of

hospital, doctors, nurses, tests, the funeral, and all.

>

> Also a certain sadness that ensues, but... I feel relieved. I feel almost free

of nada's ghost.

>

> More then a hundred people came to the funeral and almost all speaking so

higly of her. She was indeed very popular and, to the outside world, the perfect

mother/granmother/friend.

>

> Every time the phone rings now, I still think it's her, but, then - oh what a

relief - I realize it is not. No more manipulations, no more mean remarks, no

more whining, no more insults.

>

> I know it may sound callous, but I feel free.

>

> peace.

>

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