funny stuff

[Guest guest]

Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign papers

for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it is from

out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to explain

to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the house,

but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be

at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the

lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide

two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again, whatever,

Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies until

he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to drag

myself out of the house next week.

On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me and

helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

[Guest guest]

I'm so glad for you that you are moving away from your pd parents, who

apparently have not a molecule of concern or empathy for your needs and

feelings. Setting up a trust is NOT an emergency situation, and not like

hitting a drop-dead air-date or a press-date, for pete's sake; it could easily

be postponed until you are more healed and more mobile.

Unless perhaps your pd-dad feels that he's going to drop dead AT ANY MOMENT and

must take care of this legal matter RIGHT NOW?

(Sometimes sarcasm can be an effective tool, but sometimes it can backfire and

make things worse. Why would it be so difficult for your pd-dad to say to the

lawyer " I need to postpone this for a few weeks until my daughter can come here

with me, she's broken her foot and needs to keep it elevated; she is in a lot of

pain " or " I need you to come with me to my daughter's house to conclude this

matter; I'll provide the two witnesses. " How hard is that, huh? Maybe try that

as a tactic next time: if pd-dad demands something, sweetly say " Sure, OK dad! "

but then knock the ball back into *his* court to make the whatever demand

actually happen. That's dad's job, not yours. " I think that's sweet that you

want to set up this trust fund, dad, and I'll be happy to sign the papers, but I

need you to XYZ in order for me to do that; thanks for understanding! " )

The depth, breadth and pervasiveness of narcissistic egoism and the narcissistic

sense of entitlement NEVER ceases to amaze me.

I hope your foot feels better soon, and I'm glad you have a good-guy husband who

is taking care of you.

-Annie

>

> Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

>

> Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign papers

for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it is from

out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to explain

to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the house,

but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be

at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the

lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide

two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again, whatever,

Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

>

> I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

>

> On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me and

helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

>

> We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

>

[Guest guest]

Yeah, you're right. I've gotten somewhat of a handle on dealing with NADA, but

FADA has been so bullying for so long that sometimes it's hard for me to think

fast enough to deal with him creatively. At least I'm not afraid of him, which

several people are. It kind of makes me laugh that some people think of him as

actually being potentially physically threatening, because I know that at his

core he's a blowhard coward and not dangerous at all. Yesterday he managed to

catch me when I was down and tired, though, and once again he managed to get

things to go the way he wanted.

> >

> > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

> >

> > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign

papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it

is from out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to

explain to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me

to be at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have

the lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to

provide two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> >

> > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

> >

> > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me

and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> >

> > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Sorry you broke your foot.

As to your NPD dad, let me couch this delicately.

Bullshit.

The appropriate answer is, Dad I have a broken foot. Too bad if that

inconveniences you and your lawyer, but that is how it is. Your lawyer

can send his paralegal to my house with the papers I need to sign, or

you can sign them the next time the lawyer is in town. What, he will

only be in your state one day, EVER? Again, bullshit.

There are lots of ways to get papers signed. The lawyer can overnight

them to you for your signature, then have a courier , or paralegal pick

them up and deliver them to the office where the meeting will take

place. The lawyer doesnt have a junior associate who does flunky work

for him?

Or, here s a thought. Take the papers, Dad, fold them till they have

sharp corners, then bend over, drop your pants, and...well, you get the

notion.

There are three ways to deal with a bullying Narcissist.

Obey.

Sweetly and stubbornly refuse to comply.

Refuse as rudely and contemtpably as possible.

I prefer the last option, unless it is in a situation where others can

overhear. Then option 2 gets your point across while letting the NPD

look like the ass he is.

Feel free to adapt my rules for narcissists freely.

As for your gaslighting BPD mom, yea Crazy Pants.

Ask her if she is still dating that cute Dr who treated her sprained

ankle and she had an affair with, and whether Dad ever found out about

the 2 of them.

Hey, 2 can play Crazy Pants! LOL

Doug

>

> Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days

ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking

great care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and

her response was to remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which

I remember, I was there) and then to " remind " me that she'd been in a

cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER

happened.

>

> Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to

sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer

working on it is from out of state and will only be in town for one

particular day. I tried to explain to dad how difficult it is for me to

get down our steps and out of the house, but as usual, it there was no

point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be at a certain place at a

certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come to my

house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

>

> I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and

bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling

well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

>

> On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on

me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my

parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

>

> We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of

here.

>

[Guest guest]

I can relate. On the arguing, never works. I won't move back to

the state I grew up in. 2 many memories.

Steph

funny stuff

Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few

days ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful

and is taking great care of me. I called Nada to let her know

I'd broken my foot and her response was to remind me of the time

she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and then

to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR

MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me

to sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason,

the lawyer working on it is from out of state and will only be in

town for one particular day. I tried to explain to dad how

difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to

argue. He wants me to be at a certain place at a certain time,

and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come to my

house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers

and bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll

be feeling well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's

waiting on me and helping me with everything. How I managed to

not recreate my parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out

of here.

------------------------------------

**This group is based on principles in Randi Kreger's new book

The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder:

New Tips and Tools to Stop Walking on Eggshells, available at

www.BPDCentral.com.** Problems? Write @.... DO

NOT RESPOND ON THE LIST.

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Recommended: " Toxic Parents, " " Surviving a Borderline Parent, "

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Groups Links

[Guest guest]

I think it's great that we can laugh about this stuff! That IS funny.

You could have told your mother you were being held hostage somewhere and she

would've come up with a story to match or exceed yours. My nada's the same!!

I once heard nada trying to outdo a new widow whose husband had just died from

cancer. " you think YOU had it bad...huh! Let me tell you..... " And the poor,

new widow was trapped listening to her go on and on.

No one suffers more than them.

>

> Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

>

> Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign papers

for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it is from

out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to explain

to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the house,

but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be

at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the

lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide

two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again, whatever,

Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

>

> I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

>

> On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me and

helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

>

> We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

>

[Guest guest]

" FADA has been so bullying for so long that sometimes it's hard for me to think

fast enough to deal with him creatively. "

That's exactly how my father was. I was terrified of saying no to him.

> > >

> > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

> > >

> > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign

papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it

is from out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to

explain to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me

to be at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have

the lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to

provide two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > >

> > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

> > >

> > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me

and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > >

> > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

That is precisely why its so incredibly difficult for us KOs, even as

self-reliant, responsible adults, to stand up for ourselves with a bullying,

domineering pd parent: they have trained and conditioned us from birth to *fear*

them, to obey them, and to placate and appease them. We have been subjected to

brainwashing.

That's why in my opinion parenting should be considered an almost sacred trust,

because its so ridiculously easy to mold, form or warp a child's mind and

psyche, possibly for life: the small child is abjectly dependent on their

parents for their very existence, and abjectly dependent on their parents to

*tell the child who he or she is*. (Which in mentally healthy parent/child

relationships means *helping the child discover who he or she is.*) And nothing

is more innocent and trusting and desiring to please the parent than a small

child, and nothing is easier to inculcate with fear than a small child.

Whatever mommy or daddy says is The Truth. Mommy and daddy are The Law.

So its extra hard for us KOs to " deprogram " ourselves from just catering to or

deferring to domineering, controlling, bullying pd parents. Its so easy to

control a child through fear. As small children we were trained and conditioned

that standing up to them has very, very terrifying, negative consequences. Its

been inculcated into us that when we are in the presence of our domineering pd

parent, the are The Parent and very large and they have all the power, and we

are the child and very small and have no power. Its just really damned

difficult to break free of that fear-conditioning.

But its possible.

-Annie

> > > >

> > > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days

ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great

care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response

was to remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was

there) and then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR

MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

> > > >

> > > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign

papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it

is from out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to

explain to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me

to be at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have

the lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to

provide two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > > >

> > > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and

bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well

enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

> > > >

> > > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on

me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > > >

> > > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of

here.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Exactly! It IS funny. It's freaking hillarious. While my dad was over here

pestering me (my parents are divorced) I was texting my husband who is

telecomuting from home in another part of the house. " Why are my parents such

ass holes? Unbelievable. " And he texted back something like, " I don't know. I'm

sorry. "

My NADA is SO like that. NO ONE suffers more than her. She could meet a

Holocaust survivor and argue that she's had it worse than them. Who the fuck

wears a PLASTER CAST for FOUR MONTHS for a SPRAIN??? NOBODY! But even if a

*doctor* contradicted her she'd insist that she knew what she was talking about.

She never had any cast at all! She put ice on her ankle for a couple of days.

THAT WAS IT.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but I'm really not scared of my dad. It

really was just a matter of being too exhausted, drugged up and worn out to

think, stand my ground and argue with him. This time it was just the easy way

out to agree and have him leave. I've been standing up to him for years. For

some reason, I'm literally one of the only people on the planet who does.

Well--my brother has gotten pretty good at it too in the last few years. Other

people are really afraid of him, but he's just a pussy who throws loud tantrums.

> >

> > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

> >

> > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign

papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it

is from out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to

explain to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me

to be at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have

the lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to

provide two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> >

> > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

> >

> > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me

and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> >

> > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I remember a scene from the old TV show ER. character ,

Dr Greene, had a pt, who must have been BP, who was a huge

hypochondriac, and always trying to one up anyone s ailments. His last

exchange with her, she detailed what she thought was wrong with her, and

he said " I have brain cancer. I win. " and walked away.

I loved it!

Doug

> > >

> > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few

days ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is

taking great care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my

foot and her response was to remind me of the time she sprained her

ankle (which I remember, I was there) and then to " remind " me that she'd

been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants.

That NEVER happened.

> > >

> > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to

sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer

working on it is from out of state and will only be in town for one

particular day. I tried to explain to dad how difficult it is for me to

get down our steps and out of the house, but as usual, it there was no

point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be at a certain place at a

certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come to my

house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > >

> > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and

bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling

well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

> > >

> > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's

waiting on me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not

recreate my parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > >

> > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out

of here.

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

:)

> > > >

> > > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few

> days ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is

> taking great care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my

> foot and her response was to remind me of the time she sprained her

> ankle (which I remember, I was there) and then to " remind " me that she'd

> been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants.

> That NEVER happened.

> > > >

> > > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to

> sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer

> working on it is from out of state and will only be in town for one

> particular day. I tried to explain to dad how difficult it is for me to

> get down our steps and out of the house, but as usual, it there was no

> point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be at a certain place at a

> certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come to my

> house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

> witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

> whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > > >

> > > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and

> bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling

> well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

> > > >

> > > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's

> waiting on me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not

> recreate my parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > > >

> > > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out

> of here.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

sometimes it is not worth the fight.

My NADA one ups and competes for EVERYTHING (except normal things of course). oh

how she suffers. she had a car accident about 23-ish years ago and hurt her jaw

and had surgery. she still uses it. it is her universal excuse for backseat

driving (and raging) and she almost DIED. I had a photographer friend get

whiplash the day before a session, and she had to have a neck brace, and do PT,

etc... anyway I told my mom that we were not getting the pics. then because of

that, and all she talked about her own " whiplash " (a story i had never heard

before) and how horrible it was.

I used to mimic this behavior (on a smaller scale)when I was younger. once in

high school a girl I knew was in the hospital with cancer and had surgery when

I visited I could not stop talking about an accident I had had. when I got home

I felt so ashamed I resolved to drop that habit.

when your not looking for sympathy this stuff is so funny.

> > >

> > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few days ago.

Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is taking great care of

me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my foot and her response was to

remind me of the time she sprained her ankle (which I remember, I was there) and

then to " remind " me that she'd been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS.

Whatever, crazy pants. That NEVER happened.

> > >

> > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me to sign

papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the lawyer working on it

is from out of state and will only be in town for one particular day. I tried to

explain to dad how difficult it is for me to get down our steps and out of the

house, but as usual, it there was no point in even trying to argue. He wants me

to be at a certain place at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have

the lawyer come to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to

provide two witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > >

> > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers and bullies

until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be feeling well enough to

drag myself out of the house next week.

> > >

> > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's waiting on me

and helping me with everything. How I managed to not recreate my parents

self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > >

> > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out of here.

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Actually, it is a kind of common thing when visiting sick people to talk

about your own illnesses. It is a subconcious attempt to empathise with

what they are dealing with. People who visit regularly or

professionally are warned against this tendency. It is just that with

Nada, as with everything in her life, it is taken to pathological

extremes.

So, wow, you had your gall bladder out? I had my tonsils out once;

becomes, you had a hysterectomy? I nearly bled to death when I had my

daughter here. The Dr said he had never seen anything as bad as that in

his life. I sure hope you dont suffer all the agonies of hell with

this like I did when I had my daughter here. But it was worth it to

give birth to her, because , after all, I m just a giver. But I feel ok

now.

As every KO in the world giggles and says , oh yea, thats Nada.

Doug

> > > >

> > > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few

days ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is

taking great care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my

foot and her response was to remind me of the time she sprained her

ankle (which I remember, I was there) and then to " remind " me that she'd

been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants.

That NEVER happened.

> > > >

> > > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me

to sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the

lawyer working on it is from out of state and will only be in town for

one particular day. I tried to explain to dad how difficult it is for me

to get down our steps and out of the house, but as usual, it there was

no point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be at a certain place

at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come

to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > > >

> > > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers

and bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be

feeling well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

> > > >

> > > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's

waiting on me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not

recreate my parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > > >

> > > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out

of here.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with you, Doug. I think its common for those who have empathy to want

to reassure the sick or injured person that you understand their pain and feel

badly for them because you have experienced similar pain yourself, so you

understand what they need and wish to comfort and soothe them in meaningful

ways. I can see how dwelling on your own experiences when you are visiting

the sick/injured person would become tiresome to them rather quickly, though,

even if its being done with the best of intentions.

But with a bpd or npd person, regaling the patient with their own (dramatic,

gruesome or shocking) experiences is simply another opportunity to garner

attention and sympathy for themselves, by using the " one upsmanship " style of

relating. ( " You think you are suffering? My suffering was SO much worse! " )

For npds and psychopaths in particular, relating to others is about winning.

Other people are either their competitors for " food " or their potential " food "

(narcissistic supply)... that's about it. Or their possessions, I guess. Their

trophies. Or their casualties.

-Annie

> > > > >

> > > > > Hi group. Just thought I'd share a story. I broke my foot a few

> days ago. Luckily, I have a great husband who's just wonderful and is

> taking great care of me. I called Nada to let her know I'd broken my

> foot and her response was to remind me of the time she sprained her

> ankle (which I remember, I was there) and then to " remind " me that she'd

> been in a cast for her sprain for FOUR MONTHS. Whatever, crazy pants.

> That NEVER happened.

> > > > >

> > > > > Then Dad comes by to see how I'm doing and set up a time for me

> to sign papers for the trust he's setting up. For some reason, the

> lawyer working on it is from out of state and will only be in town for

> one particular day. I tried to explain to dad how difficult it is for me

> to get down our steps and out of the house, but as usual, it there was

> no point in even trying to argue. He wants me to be at a certain place

> at a certain time, and that's that. If I wanted to have the lawyer come

> to my house, then according to my dad, it was up to me to provide two

> witnesses and one of those couldn't be my husband. Sigh. Again,

> whatever, Crazy Pants II, Electric Boogaloo.

> > > > >

> > > > > I was just too tired to argue with him because he just badgers

> and bullies until he gets what he wants anyway. Hopefully I'll be

> feeling well enough to drag myself out of the house next week.

> > > > >

> > > > > On the other hand, as I said, I have a lovely husband who's

> waiting on me and helping me with everything. How I managed to not

> recreate my parents self-involved hell-hole I don't know.

> > > > >

> > > > > We're moving out of state soon. I can't wait to get the hell out

> of here.

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

>