Flying Monkeys attacking everywhere

[Guest guest]

My life has been great since Ive been NC with my nada. Granted, its difficult

but the trade off of living a drama free existence away from fear, obligation

and guilt is so worth it.

At least I thought it was free.....

I have received two phone calls from my nada in the past week. This week is the

year anniversary that my grandfada (nada's dad) passed away. i got a phone call

at 11 on a friday night because my nada wanted to invite me a memorial service

they are having the next day.... at 10 a.m!!! Ugh... kinda late notice, dont ya

think? I said I was not able to make it because I made prior arrangements but I

will pay my respects on my own. Done. thought it was over.

After a few days, I got a phone call from my uncle (fada's brother) saying that

hes in town and wants to see me. Now a little side note: I havent seen or spoke

to my uncle in about 6 years. He doesnt even know my husband and hasnt been

around at all. No phone call. No letter. Nothing. the only reason he comes

around is for money. As a child, when we had money for him, he came by. When we

said no, he went to my aunt. When my aunt was done, he went back to my nada and

so on....

I have no desire to see my uncle. He is a toxic guy and my nada's flying monkey.

i knew that if I went to see him, I would have gotten a huge lecture of why my

nada and I aren't speaking. I dont have to justify my life to a man that hasnt

been in it in 6 years!

It felt good to finally step up and say " No " . I knew that this was my nada's

puppetry. This was all my nada's ploy to try to get me in her world.

AJ

[Guest guest]

Good for you AJ! That' s really what I'd do. Once I cut off the relationship I

Cut and that's it, no uncles sent over will get me to change. Though I caved

recently.

I was NC for a while, but my Dad lured me back in. Actually it went along the

lines of: they show up at my house, ring the doorbell holding an icecream cake

to give us and the kids (ironic it's icecream cake so that it will melt outside

if I don't let them in - funny thing is next time Mom came over 2 days later the

she brought the same cake, or what was left of it after her and her favorite

daughter ate 3/4 of it!!! The NERVE of that woman) , with no prior notice,

thankfully my brother gave me a head's up 2 minutes before they showed up, and

so I didn't answer the doorbell. I pretended we weren't home. Made me really

anxious, the whole thing. Then after that Dad said oh we just wanted to see

you, and you should take an olive branch, Mom is leaving traveling and wants to

see you, etc. the usual, and that's how she got back in. Since then she has

increasingly been going whacko with me again, and I am considering going NC

again, I think I just might do it starting from today. She is leaving tonight

traveling and that's why she is going beserck trying to get me to visit her

which I won't (haven't been over in almost a year and will not).

N

> My life has been great since Ive been NC with my nada. Granted, its difficult

but the trade off of living a drama free existence away from fear, obligation

and guilt is so worth it.

>

> At least I thought it was free.....

>

> I have received two phone calls from my nada in the past week. This week is

the year anniversary that my grandfada (nada's dad) passed away. i got a phone

call at 11 on a friday night because my nada wanted to invite me a memorial

service they are having the next day.... at 10 a.m!!! Ugh... kinda late notice,

dont ya think? I said I was not able to make it because I made prior

arrangements but I will pay my respects on my own. Done. thought it was over.

>

> After a few days, I got a phone call from my uncle (fada's brother) saying

that hes in town and wants to see me. Now a little side note: I havent seen or

spoke to my uncle in about 6 years. He doesnt even know my husband and hasnt

been around at all. No phone call. No letter. Nothing. the only reason he comes

around is for money. As a child, when we had money for him, he came by. When we

said no, he went to my aunt. When my aunt was done, he went back to my nada and

so on....

>

> I have no desire to see my uncle. He is a toxic guy and my nada's flying

monkey. i knew that if I went to see him, I would have gotten a huge lecture of

why my nada and I aren't speaking. I dont have to justify my life to a man that

hasnt been in it in 6 years!

>

> It felt good to finally step up and say " No " . I knew that this was my nada's

puppetry. This was all my nada's ploy to try to get me in her world.

>

> AJ

>

>

[Guest guest]

good for you.

that was a little careless for her to invite you at the last moment possible.

well, a 'little careless' is an understatement, to say the least.

good for you for saying no to the visit from the uncle. that takes a ton of

resolve as we all know. thanks also for posting it because just knowing you did

it is very inspiring and it really resonates when someone is able to set

boundaries and ward off the flying monkeys, it helps me to know I can do it too.

>

> My life has been great since Ive been NC with my nada. Granted, its difficult

but the trade off of living a drama free existence away from fear, obligation

and guilt is so worth it.

>

> At least I thought it was free.....

>

> I have received two phone calls from my nada in the past week. This week is

the year anniversary that my grandfada (nada's dad) passed away. i got a phone

call at 11 on a friday night because my nada wanted to invite me a memorial

service they are having the next day.... at 10 a.m!!! Ugh... kinda late notice,

dont ya think? I said I was not able to make it because I made prior

arrangements but I will pay my respects on my own. Done. thought it was over.

>

> After a few days, I got a phone call from my uncle (fada's brother) saying

that hes in town and wants to see me. Now a little side note: I havent seen or

spoke to my uncle in about 6 years. He doesnt even know my husband and hasnt

been around at all. No phone call. No letter. Nothing. the only reason he comes

around is for money. As a child, when we had money for him, he came by. When we

said no, he went to my aunt. When my aunt was done, he went back to my nada and

so on....

>

> I have no desire to see my uncle. He is a toxic guy and my nada's flying

monkey. i knew that if I went to see him, I would have gotten a huge lecture of

why my nada and I aren't speaking. I dont have to justify my life to a man that

hasnt been in it in 6 years!

>

> It felt good to finally step up and say " No " . I knew that this was my nada's

puppetry. This was all my nada's ploy to try to get me in her world.

>

> AJ

>