Welcome new members

[Guest guest]

I'm glad you all found the Group, although its sad to need it. It is really

validating to discover that there are other people with their own bpd mother or

father whose behavior is uncannily similar. We fellow KOs, adult kids of bpd

parents, understand what you're going through.

Becoming as educated as possible about borderline pd and the other Cluster B

personality disorders is very empowering. It helps us to take the negative,

irrational, demanding, overly-sensitive, emotional behaviors less personally.

Borderline pd can manifest in such different ways that it seems like it should

be different disorders. Most of us here have mothers with bpd (most have not

been formally diagnosed) or bpd traits, but there are a few with bpd fathers as

well.

In the book " Understanding The Borderline Mother " the author describes 4 main

types. The " Waif " bpd is a very dependent, child-like person who expects to be

taken care of like a baby. " Hermit " types are not very social and tend to be

fearful, self-isolated and dependent on their adult children. The " Queen " type

is more narcissistic, demanding, competitive, and domineering/bossy. The

" Witch " type has antisocial pd traits and may actually try to harm her children,

and is generally very punitive and harsh.

That and other books like Randi Kreger's " Stop Walking ON Eggshells " and her

newer books help us learn how to set reasonable, rational boundaries for

ourselves in order to protect ourselves from further emotional abuse, and

perhaps retain some kind of relationship with our mentally ill parents.

" Surviving A Borderline Parent " gets good reviews too, although I haven't read

that one.

Anyway, welcome new folks. I hope you can find some validation and good ideas

here and some comfort knowing that you're not alone.

-Annie