No hope for my sis and I to be friends again.

[Guest guest]

I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to where

my nada lives (8hours away).

It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless it's

bad stuff, I'm sure.

I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She is in

my nada's close watch now.

Time to let it go.

Sara Jo

[Guest guest]

My heart breaks to hear this I wish you all the strength to get through this.

>

> I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to where

my nada lives (8hours away).

>

> It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless

it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

>

> I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She is in

my nada's close watch now.

>

> Time to let it go.

>

> Sara Jo

>

[Guest guest]

how awful. I'm so sorry.

I have felt the same way about my brother and still hold out hope he'll come

around but he's also super enmeshed with her. And yet, when we talk, he'll say

things like, " I just wish she'd give me some space! " or, " I love her so, so

much, but why can't I just call her once a day?? "

I don't know what to say to him at those times. Sigh.

Again, very sorry about your sister. Although I'm not NC with my nada, I know

how you feel.

Hugs,

Fiona

>

> I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to where

my nada lives (8hours away).

>

> It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless

it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

>

> I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She is in

my nada's close watch now.

>

> Time to let it go.

>

> Sara Jo

>

[Guest guest]

Hello Sara JO:

I feel your pain. I just found out my BPD bro is moving back in with my mom and

dad, who live in the country in another state. Supposedly the only job he could

find (in the entire U.S.) was in their small town.

My mom is in denial he has a problem, my dad recognizes how messed up bro is,

but is light years away from seeing that he, too, had the same kind of rage and

abusive tendencies as a young man. It's a volatile mixture.

I hate to think about my folks, who were finally in their old age working their

way towards some kind of happiness, getting re-emeshed in all that crazy. I

worry about elder abuse.

I doubt bro will ever move away again. He's 46 now, unmarried, never had a

stable relationship that lasted.

He's driving towards them right now, across country. He's winging back to the

nest like a wounded bird....

Letty

> >

> > I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to

where my nada lives (8hours away).

> >

> > It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless

it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

> >

> > I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She is

in my nada's close watch now.

> >

> > Time to let it go.

> >

> > Sara Jo

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for everyone's responses. And Letty, my sis is only 25 years old. But I

can't imagine her being able to live a normal life with my mom. So even though

she is young and has her whole life ahead of her...I'm afraid that she will end

up just living her whole life for nada. There are consequences if she tries to

live her own life (i.e. dating, job advancement, living on her own, etc)

Aside from her own demise.....I really miss her. But I will be ok. Not like I

haven't been through this before with my nada!

Thanks for all your support, guys.

Sara Jo

> > >

> > > I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to

where my nada lives (8hours away).

> > >

> > > It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless

it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

> > >

> > > I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She

is in my nada's close watch now.

> > >

> > > Time to let it go.

> > >

> > > Sara Jo

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hello Sara Jo-

Oh, if she's only 25, there may still be some hope for her. I didn't fully break

away until my 30s. I went NC in my 20s, but the fear and guilt and oppression

didn't lift until later, when I'd had more chances to experience life away from

the family.

I hope that she'll find her way out of the FOG.

Perhaps you can be a beacon she can steer her boat towards, as you build a happy

and successful, independent life.

best of luck to you!

Letty

> > > >

> > > > I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to

where my nada lives (8hours away).

> > > >

> > > > It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again

unless it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

> > > >

> > > > I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She

is in my nada's close watch now.

> > > >

> > > > Time to let it go.

> > > >

> > > > Sara Jo

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I too am sorry to hear this, but can so relate.

I feel as if I have lost both my older and younger sisters to the same fate.

My older sister, who for years was the bad one, now lives within 3 miles of nada

7 months of the year, and younger sister is so emeshed she and nada are like

BBF's. I am the most distant and the middle. I have to set my boundries and keep

them and can't get emeshed again. I am not NC, but am much more distant

emotionally and physically than ever. I am much healthier for it. I don't know

that my sisters will ever come out of it. Little sister is very NP and

manipulative and insecure. She and nada are two peas in a pod. Older sister is

very needy and doesn't have many friends as she burns bridges like wildfire. She

and nada are rather co-dependent, and much more since my dear dad died a few

years ago. Nada feels very needed by her. I am the puzzle to her I think and

happier for it.

> >

> > I just found out that my little sis (who is enmeshed with nada) moved to

where my nada lives (8hours away).

> >

> > It's all over now. I will never see from her or hear from her again unless

it's bad stuff, I'm sure.

> >

> > I'm giving up any ounce of hope I ever had for her to " come around " . She is

in my nada's close watch now.

> >

> > Time to let it go.

> >

> > Sara Jo

> >

>