Guest guest Posted July 16, 2011 Report Share Posted July 16, 2011 Hi, I have just discovered that my mother has BPD. For a long time I had been reading a book called 'Emotional Blackmail' because she was always severely controlling and so I thought she must be a control freak. The problem was, that I found this book did not describe all the 'symptoms' she displayed, one of which was the fact that she was very unstable, and would fly into rages unexpectedly. Anyways, what I am trying to determine, is how to tell whether I or my brother was the Good/Child child. I seem to fit half the characterists of both...? Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 18, 2011 Report Share Posted July 18, 2011 Hi I too have wondered if I was the bad child or golden (good) as I seem to be both. Sometimes at the same time! Now that was confusing to me. In my view, my nada spilt me, my brother and dad into bad or good to suit her agenda. As her agenda was ever changing depending on what day it was, so was whether I was good, bad, scapegoat etc. changed as well. Nav > > Hi, > > I have just discovered that my mother has BPD. For a long time I had been reading a book called 'Emotional Blackmail' because she was always severely controlling and so I thought she must be a control freak. The problem was, that I found this book did not describe all the 'symptoms' she displayed, one of which was the fact that she was very unstable, and would fly into rages unexpectedly. > > Anyways, what I am trying to determine, is how to tell whether I or my brother was the Good/Child child. I seem to fit half the characterists of both...? > > Thanks. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 18, 2011 Report Share Posted July 18, 2011 Yes you can be both. I think that it sounds like her splitting cycle is just fast. > ** > > > > > Hi > I too have wondered if I was the bad child or golden (good) as I seem to be > both. Sometimes at the same time! Now that was confusing to me. > In my view, my nada spilt me, my brother and dad into bad or good to suit > her agenda. As her agenda was ever changing depending on what day it was, so > was whether I was good, bad, scapegoat etc. changed as well. > > Nav > at is > > > > > > Hi, > > > > I have just discovered that my mother has BPD. For a long time I had been > reading a book called 'Emotional Blackmail' because she was always severely > controlling and so I thought she must be a control freak. The problem was, > that I found this book did not describe all the 'symptoms' she displayed, > one of which was the fact that she was very unstable, and would fly into > rages unexpectedly. > > > > Anyways, what I am trying to determine, is how to tell whether I or my > brother was the Good/Child child. I seem to fit half the characterists of > both...? > > > > Thanks. > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 18, 2011 Report Share Posted July 18, 2011 If you feel like you were both, then you probably were both at various points and maybe even at the same time. (A lot of love/hate stuff goes on with them, and holding conflicting ideas in their minds at the same time seems common.) Sometimes there is a clear cut division and one child is the " good " one while others are " bad " but I think it is common for who is " good " and who is " bad " to swing back and forth depending on who seems like a better target any particular moment in time. Refusing to do something or saying the wrong thing can turn the " good child " into the " bad child " in the blink of an eye. At 07:02 AM 07/16/2011 freelegends wrote: >I have just discovered that my mother has BPD. For a long time >I had been reading a book called 'Emotional Blackmail' because >she was always severely controlling and so I thought she must >be a control freak. The problem was, that I found this book did >not describe all the 'symptoms' she displayed, one of which was >the fact that she was very unstable, and would fly into rages >unexpectedly. > >Anyways, what I am trying to determine, is how to tell whether >I or my brother was the Good/Child child. I seem to fit half >the characterists of both...? > >Thanks. -- Katrina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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