hello and this is me

[Guest guest]

Hey friends,

My name is Rochelle and I am the oldest child of a BP mother who will be 64 this

year (though she acts 84). I am essentially her caretaker in lots of ways -

financially and emotionally, mostly - and I resent it quite a bit. I know I need

to get past this, but as you know it's a very hard thing to do. You want them to

be the adult and not the child. I am unmarried and have no children and my three

siblings all have their own family responsibilities, so I seem to be the perfect

target for caretaker.

I have just begun reading *Stop Walking on Eggshells,* and find myself feeling

very sympathetic to her plight. My grandmother was BPD also and I think my 14

year-old niece is too. She hasn't been diagnosed, but all the signs are there.

She's pretty much a younger version of my mother.

I have also read *Understanding the Borderline Mother* by Ann Lawson,

which was really helpful.

What I would like to be able to do is enlist the help of my siblings in dealing

with her, so that the pressure for emotional support is not all on me. I do not

live with her - she lives alone - but I visit her once a week and I am the only

one who will. For the most part, she treats me well (as the favorite child). My

main complaint is that she is too dependent on me.

Just thought I'd introduce myself, since I plan to scroll through the other

posts and learn your stories and may have comments. Thanks and I am glad to be

here.

[Guest guest]

Hi Rochelle!

I'm new to the board too so I thought I would say Hi. My sister and I have

recently learned about BPD and for the first time feel like we have a name for

what we've been dealing with all of our lives. She's read UTBM and I'm waiting

for a copy to be delivered--from what I know about the book, I'm certainly that

my mom has an undiagnosed BPD. She and my sister aren't speaking at this point

and instead of perpetuating that or getting sucked into it myself (for the

millionth time), we're trying to come up with a plan of action to talk to our

mom, show love and support and yet learn to set boundaries...I'm nervous because

I'm certain that she'll turn into the Witch as soon as she feels like we're

ganging up on her.

I hope we both find whatever it was we were searching for when we found this

site.

JG

>

> Hey friends,

> My name is Rochelle and I am the oldest child of a BP mother who will be 64

this year (though she acts 84). I am essentially her caretaker in lots of ways -

financially and emotionally, mostly - and I resent it quite a bit. I know I need

to get past this, but as you know it's a very hard thing to do. You want them to

be the adult and not the child. I am unmarried and have no children and my three

siblings all have their own family responsibilities, so I seem to be the perfect

target for caretaker.

>

> I have just begun reading *Stop Walking on Eggshells,* and find myself feeling

very sympathetic to her plight. My grandmother was BPD also and I think my 14

year-old niece is too. She hasn't been diagnosed, but all the signs are there.

She's pretty much a younger version of my mother.

>

> I have also read *Understanding the Borderline Mother* by Ann

Lawson, which was really helpful.

>

> What I would like to be able to do is enlist the help of my siblings in

dealing with her, so that the pressure for emotional support is not all on me. I

do not live with her - she lives alone - but I visit her once a week and I am

the only one who will. For the most part, she treats me well (as the favorite

child). My main complaint is that she is too dependent on me.

>

> Just thought I'd introduce myself, since I plan to scroll through the other

posts and learn your stories and may have comments. Thanks and I am glad to be

here.

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome to you new members, JG and Rochelle, and all other newbies. I hope you

all will find as much support, peace and healing as I have in this Group.

There is something very validating and comforting about learning that its not

just you, that others understand what you are going through and what you are

feeling because they have observed and experienced uncannily similar

dysfunctional behaviors from their own borderline pd mothers and/or fathers.

Its good to share thoughtful insights, and to give and receive validation from

fellow travelers on our individual journeys toward peace and healing, even if

the paths we take to get there are different from each other.

best wishes,

-Annie

> >

> > Hey friends,

> > My name is Rochelle and I am the oldest child of a BP mother who will be 64

this year (though she acts 84). I am essentially her caretaker in lots of ways -

financially and emotionally, mostly - and I resent it quite a bit. I know I need

to get past this, but as you know it's a very hard thing to do. You want them to

be the adult and not the child. I am unmarried and have no children and my three

siblings all have their own family responsibilities, so I seem to be the perfect

target for caretaker.

> >

> > I have just begun reading *Stop Walking on Eggshells,* and find myself

feeling very sympathetic to her plight. My grandmother was BPD also and I think

my 14 year-old niece is too. She hasn't been diagnosed, but all the signs are

there. She's pretty much a younger version of my mother.

> >

> > I have also read *Understanding the Borderline Mother* by Ann

Lawson, which was really helpful.

> >

> > What I would like to be able to do is enlist the help of my siblings in

dealing with her, so that the pressure for emotional support is not all on me. I

do not live with her - she lives alone - but I visit her once a week and I am

the only one who will. For the most part, she treats me well (as the favorite

child). My main complaint is that she is too dependent on me.

> >

> > Just thought I'd introduce myself, since I plan to scroll through the other

posts and learn your stories and may have comments. Thanks and I am glad to be

here.

> >

>