alternate avenue of waifyness

[Guest guest]

have been extremely LC with nada for about a month now. we've had one phone

convo, maybe 5 txt and 2 emails. for me, that's nearly NC!!!

anyway, today i get this txt: i'm so lonesome.

i didn't reply for 4 hours.

then i said something funny with no response to the lonesome comment. i take it

she wants me to say " well, then, i'll come visit or you come here " .

NOT going to happen.

we can't go on like this indefinitely. something's going to have to be said out

loud at some point, i guess. but i kind of like the way it's going now with

just very short txt messages.

this saturday my sis and her family are coming to visit us for a week. omg. no

one told nada about this (nothing explicit). will she invite herself? i don't

know. but she'll have to do it over text which would be awkward, even for her.

then again, there's always the chance she'll show up on the door step. i'll

deal w/that when and if it happens. actually, my husband said he'd be glad to

take that one over for me.

Cassie

[Guest guest]

Oh barf! When I'm lonesome, I'll go somewhere or call someone or maybe just

watch the Lord of the Rings for the thirty bazillionth time, but I will

definitely not TEXT my DAUGHTER just to let her know of my pathetic

lonesomeness. My new favorite phrase that I say to my kids when they do

something passive like this is to ask them, point blank, " What were you hoping

to accomplish by saying this? " My kids, ironically, know exactly what I mean

when I say that, and we can then go on to a conversation about how to express

needs more directly and respectfully. My nada would never be able to figure that

out.

>

> have been extremely LC with nada for about a month now. we've had one phone

convo, maybe 5 txt and 2 emails. for me, that's nearly NC!!!

>

> anyway, today i get this txt: i'm so lonesome.

>

> i didn't reply for 4 hours.

>

> then i said something funny with no response to the lonesome comment. i take

it she wants me to say " well, then, i'll come visit or you come here " .

>

> NOT going to happen.

>

> we can't go on like this indefinitely. something's going to have to be said

out loud at some point, i guess. but i kind of like the way it's going now with

just very short txt messages.

>

> this saturday my sis and her family are coming to visit us for a week. omg.

no one told nada about this (nothing explicit). will she invite herself? i

don't know. but she'll have to do it over text which would be awkward, even for

her. then again, there's always the chance she'll show up on the door step.

i'll deal w/that when and if it happens. actually, my husband said he'd be

glad to take that one over for me.

>

> Cassie

>

>

[Guest guest]

 I guess I could reply, " And? "

Â

Cassie

Â

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Sent: Wednesday, July 20, 2011 2:03 PM

Subject: Re: alternate avenue of waifyness

Â

Oh barf! When I'm lonesome, I'll go somewhere or call someone or maybe just

watch the Lord of the Rings for the thirty bazillionth time, but I will

definitely not TEXT my DAUGHTER just to let her know of my pathetic

lonesomeness. My new favorite phrase that I say to my kids when they do

something passive like this is to ask them, point blank, " What were you hoping

to accomplish by saying this? " My kids, ironically, know exactly what I mean

when I say that, and we can then go on to a conversation about how to express

needs more directly and respectfully. My nada would never be able to figure that

out.

>

> have been extremely LC with nada for about a month now. we've had oneÂ

phone convo, maybe 5 txt and 2 emails. for me, that's nearly NC!!!

>

> anyway, today i get this txt:Â i'm so lonesome.

>

> i didn't reply for 4 hours.

>

> then i said something funny with no response to the lonesome comment. i take

it she wants me to say " well, then, i'll come visit or you come here " .

>

> NOT going to happen.

>

> we can't go on like this indefinitely. something's going to have to be said

out loud at some point, i guess. but i kind of like the way it's going now

with just very short txt messages.

>

> this saturday my sis and her family are coming to visit us for a week. omg.Â

 no one told nada about this (nothing explicit). will she invite herself?Â

i don't know. but she'll have to do it over text which would be awkward, even

for her. then again, there's always the chance she'll show up on the door

step. i'll deal w/that when and if it happens.  actually, my husband said

he'd be glad to take that one over for me.Â

> Â

> Cassie

>

>

[Guest guest]

Cassie,

When my nada says something like that to me, I reply with a

suggestion that she needs to find some activities to go to where

she can get out of the house and meet other people.

I said something of that sort to my nada last week after she

complained to me that she only had one friend and this week she

told me that she'd found a senior center that she can go to

during the day to socialize with other people. They have fitness

classes and games to play and stuff like that. I'm amazed that

she actually followed my advice. Time will tell whether she gets

along with the people there well enough that she keeps going.

Most likely she'll find reasons not to like the people there and

we'll have to have another conversation about finding activities

to go to.

At 02:02 PM 07/20/2011 Cassie C. wrote:

>have been extremely LC with nada for about a month now. we've

>had one phone convo, maybe 5 txt and 2 emails. for me, that's

>nearly NC!!!

>

>anyway, today i get this txt: i'm so lonesome.

>

>i didn't reply for 4 hours.

>

>then i said something funny with no response to the lonesome

>comment. i take it she wants me to say " well, then, i'll come

>visit or you come here " .

>

>NOT going to happen.

>

>we can't go on like this indefinitely. something's going to

>have to be said out loud at some point, i guess. but i kind of

>like the way it's going now with just very short txt messages.

>

>this saturday my sis and her family are coming to visit us for

>a week. omg. no one told nada about this (nothing

>explicit). will she invite herself? i don't know. but she'll

>have to do it over text which would be awkward, even for

>her. then again, there's always the chance she'll show up on

>the door step. i'll deal w/that when and if it

>happens. actually, my husband said he'd be glad to take that

>one over for me.

>

>Cassie

--

Katrina

[Guest guest]

I think it could go on for a very very very long time. If there is a

confrontion - medium chill! Or you have to go. You have a meeting. You have

a deadline. The house is on fire! I think you can skirt the edges for an

extremely long time if you put your mind to it! I've done it!

> **

>

>

> Cassie,

> When my nada says something like that to me, I reply with a

> suggestion that she needs to find some activities to go to where

> she can get out of the house and meet other people.

>

> I said something of that sort to my nada last week after she

> complained to me that she only had one friend and this week she

> told me that she'd found a senior center that she can go to

> during the day to socialize with other people. They have fitness

> classes and games to play and stuff like that lon. I'm amazed that

> she actually followed my advice. Time will tell whether she gets

> along with the people there well enough that she keeps going.

> Most likely she'll find reasons not to like the people there and

> we'll have to have another conversation about finding activities

> to go to.

>

>

> At 02:02 PM 07/20/2011 Cassie C. wrote:

> >have been extremely LC with nada for about a month now. we've

> >had one phone convo, maybe 5 txt and 2 emails. for me, that's

> >nearly NC!!!

> >

> >anyway, today i get this txt: i'm so lonesome.

> >

> >i didn't reply for 4 hours.

> >

> >then i said something funny with no response to the lonesome

> >comment. i take it she wants me to say " well, then, i'll come

> >visit or you come here " .

> >

> >NOT going to happen.

> >

> >we can't go on like this indefinitely. something's going to

> >have to be said out loud at some point, i guess. but i kind of

> >like the way it's going now with just very short txt messages.

> >

> >this saturday my sis and her family are coming to visit us for

> >a week. omg. no one told nada about this (nothing

> >explicit). will she invite herself? i don't know. but she'll

> >have to do it over text which would be awkward, even for

> >her. then again, there's always the chance she'll show up on

> >the door step. i'll deal w/that when and if it

> >happens. actually, my husband said he'd be glad to take that

> >one over for me.

> >

> >Cassie

>

> --

> Katrina

>

>

>