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Finding your 'hurts'

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This is a PS to my earlier post--I thought about how, once I just got dressed

and got out the door, being at the office and doing things here was really the

easier task. For me, getting dressed to leave is always a difficult

undertaking, because it was while I was doing that (getting ready for school)

that nada conducted a large part of her abuse. That is one thing that's really,

really *hard for me. And, certain tasks at work are harder than

others--meaning, they take up more emotional energy, cause more stress than

others. I think it's really important to know which things are hard for us and

which things are, instead, energy generating. As KOs we were taught to ignore

and discount those messages from ourselves. It's really important to try and

limit how many 'hard' things you force yourself to do in one day--especially

days of great stress! One year I spent several months doing journal entries

every day--what felt good today, what felt bad today--until I learned what was

stressful.

Getting dressed in the morning or day--ALWAYS stressful.

And the more stress one is under overall, the *harder, the hard things are.

It's good to understand though that this does not mean we are out of control--we

can catch back up again and learn to design our days, and our tasks, so that we

can do things comfortably, recognizing what's going to hurt and what's not going

to.

--Charlie

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