Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Hi ladiesTHANK u for Being. Thank u for asking this particular question and thank for all the responses the anger, hate, the shock at how pple respond to our kids. The love, hope, joy and faith u ve in our kids.Thank u for the skills, research, education, knowledge and the way u r always sooooo willing to open u hearts and minds and sometimes u whole life and help ppl like me stay strong all uo strength and passion comes through and if God hears even a quarter of our cries things will only get better for our kids.And maybe some day vaccines will come wth a warning like cigarettes.Again THANK U all!!!!!!!Sent from my iPhone lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Awwwww, Tendai xoxoxoxoxoxo To: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Cc: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 8:38 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Hi ladies THANK u for Being. Thank u for asking this particular question and thank for all the responses the anger, hate, the shock at how pple respond to our kids. The love, hope, joy and faith u ve in our kids. Thank u for the skills, research, education, knowledge and the way u r always sooooo willing to open u hearts and minds and sometimes u whole life and help ppl like me stay strong all uo strength and passion comes through and if God hears even a quarter of our cries things will only get better for our kids. And maybe some day vaccines will come wth a warning like cigarettes. Again THANK U all!!!!!!! Sent from my iPhone lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 U all make feel the same.. Ever grateful, Tendai, Sent from my iPhone Awwwww, Tendai xoxoxoxoxoxo To: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Cc: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 8:38 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Hi ladies THANK u for Being. Thank u for asking this particular question and thank for all the responses the anger, hate, the shock at how pple respond to our kids. The love, hope, joy and faith u ve in our kids. Thank u for the skills, research, education, knowledge and the way u r always sooooo willing to open u hearts and minds and sometimes u whole life and help ppl like me stay strong all uo strength and passion comes through and if God hears even a quarter of our cries things will only get better for our kids. And maybe some day vaccines will come wth a warning like cigarettes. Again THANK U all!!!!!!! Sent from my iPhone lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 seriously, i hope you guys are writing a book. too funny! i got so fed up with a mom this weekend asking me to stop my son from kicking gravel i said " he's on the autism spectrum, what's your excuse for being a bitch? " so much for the fun family day at the pumpkin farm. > > Hi Parents, > I wonder how you stay strong and continue to believe that our children will get better. My son has been diagnosed with Autism since he was 2, now he's turning 4 years old. I have done lots of therapy and I believe he's slowly improving. Despite that relatives and friends always have got something to say, and as much as I don't want to be affected I get upset now and then. How do you cope with peoples stares, ( on our child)judgement or even when you feel you're losing the battle? > > Thank you > > mum of 4 yr old asd son > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 See, I would have said " I will stop him, who will stop me? " kick gravel kick gravel kick gravel.My parents know better than to start stuff with me, seriously. Â seriously, i hope you guys are writing a book. too funny! i got so fed up with a mom this weekend asking me to stop my son from kicking gravel i said " he's on the autism spectrum, what's your excuse for being a bitch? " so much for the fun family day at the pumpkin farm. -- Toni------Mind like a steel trap...Rusty and illegal in 37 states. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 lmaoooooo. We're allowed to be dysfunctional, too : )To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 4:46 PMSubject: Re: How do you cope? seriously, i hope you guys are writing a book. too funny! i got so fed up with a mom this weekend asking me to stop my son from kicking gravel i said "he's on the autism spectrum, what's your excuse for being a bitch?" so much for the fun family day at the pumpkin farm. > > Hi Parents, > I wonder how you stay strong and continue to believe that our children will get better. My son has been diagnosed with Autism since he was 2, now he's turning 4 years old. I have done lots of therapy and I believe he's slowly improving. Despite that relatives and friends always have got something to say, and as much as I don't want to be affected I get upset now and then. How do you cope with peoples stares, ( on our child)judgement or even when you feel you're losing the battle? > > Thank you > > mum of 4 yr old asd son > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 lmaoooo. I love this thread.To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 5:02 PMSubject: Re: Re: How do you cope? See, I would have said "I will stop him, who will stop me?" kick gravel kick gravel kick gravel.My parents know better than to start stuff with me, seriously. seriously, i hope you guys are writing a book. too funny! i got so fed up with a mom this weekend asking me to stop my son from kicking gravel i said "he's on the autism spectrum, what's your excuse for being a bitch?" so much for the fun family day at the pumpkin farm. -- Toni------Mind like a steel trap...Rusty and illegal in 37 states. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 LOL! I love these sorts of retorts (not that I'm not a amiable guy, but some folks have it coming.... Kinda reminiscent of Sir Winston Churchill at some boring social party, who was disapprovingly told that he was drunk: " I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. " " he's on the autism spectrum, what's your excuse for being a bitch? " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Tendai..I had tears in my eyes reading your post..you are awesome! and yes to everything you said! xoxo channa To: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Cc: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 8:38 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Hi ladies THANK u for Being. Thank u for asking this particular question and thank for all the responses the anger, hate, the shock at how pple respond to our kids. The love, hope, joy and faith u ve in our kids. Thank u for the skills, research, education, knowledge and the way u r always sooooo willing to open u hearts and minds and sometimes u whole life and help ppl like me stay strong all uo strength and passion comes through and if God hears even a quarter of our cries things will only get better for our kids. And maybe some day vaccines will come wth a warning like cigarettes. Again THANK U all!!!!!!! Sent from my iPhone lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Alberta, Wow! your compliment is really just ..blows me away. Strong and knowledgeable? ... that means a lot coming from an amazing woman like yourself! never thought of myself as that ever! i usually beat myself up of bein weak and not knowing enuff! you were so right thou...autism has really peeled away so much nonsense in my brain and spirit..like who gets to say what is a successful person? and what is real? i mean most people like you said,are so busy trying to fit a mold of normal because they dont know how to be real..and they are always scared of being found out as less....so they do target anyone that they can cast judgement on..makes them feel better. all these posts im reading tonight gonna make me cry.. this group is full of amazing brilliant strong women and guys..Im strong becuase you all give me strength and I am knowledgeable cuz of all you smarty pants that share. God has his angels on this group I just feel it ! xoxoxo channa To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Mel...I believe ..that if we hold on to a picture of how we want to see out child and really try to imagine how it feels to see our child this way..and pray to your higher power that this is your childs future...i believe we can all heal our kids..i dont believe in genetic testing I believe in God personally and that he can do heal whatever he wants.. believe in miracles...have faith..believe in the good...anything can happen To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:51 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? It's hard. My daughter is 3, and making slow and steady progress, but it's not easy being out with her. I could go on and on about the embarrassing situations we've been in. We have minimized social activities with friends, family, and coworkers while we are focused on her recovery. So, I take her to our neighborhood park a lot. We have tons of fun there together. The only embarrassing thing she does there is go and sit with other families, but she is little enough where they either smile or look away. I have adjusted to this new normal, where I recently bought myself adult diapers, loony-jealous-female-astronaut style, so I can stay at the park as long as she wants, since our park does not have bathrooms. She has her diapers and I have mine. But I tell you what put an immediate stop to my depression about autism:Part of the autism evaluation at our Childrens Hospital is genetic testing. My daughter has a couple mutations; for Juvenile Parkinson and Rett. It has actually been months and months of genetic testing. We now know she won't get Juvenile Parkinson, but the effects of the Rett gene mutation still need to be determined with further testing. When I got on the Yahoo group for parents of kids who have full-blown Rett, I saw a hell far worse than any autism hell could be. I had to get off of that Yahoo group. Finding out about Rett immediately put an end to my depression about autism. Autism, I can handle, but if the results related to Rett syndrome, which we are still waiting on, end up being unfavorable... well, let's say I don't want to think about that. >> Hi Parents,> I wonder how you stay strong and continue to believe that our children will get better. My son has been diagnosed with Autism since he was 2, now he's turning 4 years old. I have done lots of therapy and I believe he's slowly improving. Despite that relatives and friends always have got something to say, and as much as I don't want to be affected I get upset now and then. How do you cope with peoples stares, ( on our child)judgement or even when you feel you're losing the battle?> > Thank you> > mum of 4 yr old asd son> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Thank you too, everyone... I realized I'm not the only one dealing with the pressure of others, mother- in law included...and the struggle to keep going for the sake of our children, I didn't even have to go to a psychiatrist, this is even more more worth it. Hope to see more of this topic, just to encourage us all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2011 Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Thank you too, everyone... I realized I'm not the only one dealing with the pressure of others, mother- in law included...and the struggle to keep going for the sake of our children, I didn't even have to go to a psychiatrist, this is even more more worth it. Hope to see more of this topic, just to encourage us all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Psychiatrist ha ha ha who needs them this group does the therapy and wth great sense of humour I find myself laughing out right when two b4 might ve bin sooooo low and tired....Sent from my iPhone Thank you too, everyone... I realized I'm not the only one dealing with the pressure of others, mother- in law included...and the struggle to keep going for the sake of our children, I didn't even have to go to a psychiatrist, this is even more more worth it. Hope to see more of this topic, just to encourage us all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 I learnt all from u Channa and u did not even know it I just read all these post wth great admiration and awe and pray I pull of my son's recovery wth even half the class u all ve Sent from my iPhone Tendai..I had tears in my eyes reading your post..you are awesome! and yes to everything you said! xoxo channa To: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Cc: "mb12valtrex " <mb12valtrex >Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 8:38 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Hi ladies THANK u for Being. Thank u for asking this particular question and thank for all the responses the anger, hate, the shock at how pple respond to our kids. The love, hope, joy and faith u ve in our kids. Thank u for the skills, research, education, knowledge and the way u r always sooooo willing to open u hearts and minds and sometimes u whole life and help ppl like me stay strong all uo strength and passion comes through and if God hears even a quarter of our cries things will only get better for our kids. And maybe some day vaccines will come wth a warning like cigarettes. Again THANK U all!!!!!!! Sent from my iPhone lmao. Alberta's on a roll tonight. To: mb12valtrex Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.>> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... /"\ |\./| | | | | |>~<| | | /'\| |/'\.. /~\| | | | \ | =[@]= | | \ | | | | | \ | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) | / \ / \ / \ _____ / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Not easily. My son is 9 years old and I'm still trying my hardest to get him well. We have made some amazing progress but I'm constantly reminded how quickly he can slide back from the slightest insult to his fragile system. I have lost my relationships with my entire family (except my husband who understands - thank God). The rest of my family members refuse to accept any of my son's diagnosis which have been ADHD, ODD, PDD-NOS and LD. They have made it known that the only reasons for his issues must be due poor parenting. They also think I'm nuts and depriving my child by doing dietary interventions and have gone behind my back sneaking him junk food every chance they got. My son still gets sick often so they say " obviously your diet and vitamins don't work " (CLUELESS!). On top of all this my son resents me for fighting with them constantly. He is an only child and wants to spend time with his extended family but can't due to their ignorance. I haven't met anyone in our area with a child my son's age who is on a healthy diet. His friends all eat unlimited junk food. My son asks me why they drink soda and eat candy and don't get sick? This is not an easy path in life that we've been given, that's for sure. The stress of it all has caused me to develop my own slew of medical issues. Some of the worst days for me have been when we are both sick at the same time. Although, I have my husband's support he doesn't have the intuition that I have to know what my child needs when he is sick so I have to get up and do it no matter how bad I'm feeling myself. I have to believe that there is a reason for everything and that some day my child will be happy and healthy and able to understand. And I know for a fact how much worse off my child would be if I wasn't doing interventions. That's what keeps me going. And of course, my online groups, I'm sure I would have lost my mind without them :-} Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 I wish I had a group like this when I was in the thick of it with . You guys make me laugh out loud and are better than any shrink. I could have used that before was okay. I felt so alone and had with no one to confide in that understood the hell we live daily. Back then, in the olden days, the internet hadn’t even been invented. I’m not even going to go into the way some family members made me feel. Okay maybe I will a little. It was awful then they implied that my kid’s autism was the result of poor parenting and all my fault. Maybe my next book could be a compilation of all your horror stories about your mother-in-laws. I’ll write that after I’m done with ’s story, but won’t be able to release it until after my mother-in-law is gone if I’m going to include the stories about her. Maybe then I can dedicate the book this way… to my mother-in-law, Betty, who without, this book wouldn't have been possible. Keep it up!!! We need to laugh more.Marcia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Yes Channa, strong and knowledgeable!! Honestly a day doesn't go by that I am not grateful and amazed and in awe at the strength and knowledge of all of you women out there. I think we feel so weak often because we are under such great strain. But like steel tempered by heating and beating in the fire, we can come out stronger in fits and starts. That being said, for me, there are the more thin or transparent times, when I can't take it anymore and terrible, dooming thoughts fill my mind. I am learning to have compassion for myself then. To forgive myself of any guilt or for wavering in exhaustion. And to allow myself the time to not 'do' anything- to not to anything 'right' or 'best', and to just get through the days and be alright with that. Everyone has said so much and I have been strengthened by reading all of these posts. I also could talk for hours on how spirituality has helped. But I am thinking at the moment about a very practical thing to do over time. That is to leave the old and create the new. We moved far away from family instinctually and this has been the best thing we ever did. They were not helpful and even the phone conversations make me ill, so I chucked my cell phone (gladly and then found out that it is recommended in the Klinghardt protocol!) and when prodded after this kept saying, nicely, 'surprise, surprise, I am not home very often so am hard to catch there, Mom and sis!'. Seriously, my first obligation is to my health and my family's health, including mental health, so I am getting quite strong in my resolution to kick out anything- literally anything, that takes away from this ability. One thing I've done is to really just generally not be around people who might judge. I don't go to playgrounds anymore. They drive me completely nuts. I would rather stick a hot poker in both of my eyes than go to a playground. So last Spring we bought a small, cheap metal swingset and the girls love it. We invite people over who I know are kind and decent and won't spend the whole visit fighting over swings or playing cops and robbers or otherwise doing things that will drive my Aspie Mia into a series of screaming, crying fits. I don't go to regular grocery stores anymore either. I only go to small health food stores (in our area the prices are cheaper), use buying clubs (very cheap, and where at pick up I meet other health minded people), and when I have to, go to stores like Whole Foods. I know this isn't an option for everyone everywhere. The last time I went to a regular store, I looked and looked and finally said to my husband, 'Do they even have food in here?' Everything was so packaged and processed. I invest a lot of energy into make friends with farmers and trade labor for food. I try to learn my local area and harvest wild edibles, and grow as much food as I can. Again, I know these things aren't available for everyone everwhere- we are finding ourselves in a virtual eden of food here in Portland, Oregon. But my point is, I isolate myself from obnoxious, white bread, judgemental people and find any possible resources I can in the health community. In my experience, people in the health community don't even see 'Autistic'- especially not as a 'behavioral' or 'psychiatric' condition. Most of the time all I have to say is 'Mia is recovering from Aspergers' and folks shake their heads and start to talk about all of the issues we are so entrenched in here. Hanging out with these people takes me out of the trenches and onto main street. There is an enormous movement of people convinced that our world is poisoned and that this poisoning is causing all of these health problems. We also don't do school. We tried it for a week for Mia this year as she hit kindergarten age. She started hitting herself all night and chewing her collars to bits. It was too much social stress for her. I have a picture of her that the school took during that week, and it makes me cry everytime I see it. She was dying. So we embraced and dove into the homeschooling community. We found like minded people, many also with 'special needs' kids, and found an education style, Waldorf, that supports teaching only to developmental stages, teaching the whole child, and within the whole family. All of the Waldorf resources we need are free and we've really turned our whole house around to this nice, comforting, supportive place where we do things as we can each day while supporting one another. When the spikes of bad days (or weeks, or months) come, it is from this foundation that we can with confidence just drop everything and force drinking or eating or PT or a whole new protocol whatever will help us get through it. I know also that not everyone can do this either, but getting back to the main point I am trying to say- We are slowly but steadily creating a world where I don't see miss Soccer Mom with new tight jeans on (who can afford new clothes when doing biomed?!) happily shoving chicken nuggets and some orange freezy things into her kids' mouth with apparently no repercussions. One simple thing I do as a general rule is not go out when really busy mainstream people are out. No grocery shopping at 3:30. I'll go at 7 or 8 pm if I can't go in the morning. No out to dinner (we can't afford it or eat most of it anyway) at 6pm. If we can go to a place, we get there right at 5pm on the odd day that is possible, and that's that. We leave just as miss smarty pants and her charming husband and their flock are showing up. I just generally try to lessen my exposure to 'normal' people. It is funny, after doing this for a while, I go to the regular grocery store and I am overwhelmed to realize that all of these normal people are actually quite ill. The last time I went to said Safeway, I saw kids that were bloated with dark circles under their eyes, a mom who was seriously anorexic, and I stood in line behind a guy who literally reaked of the smell my husband used to have when he had a tapeworm. The smell left my husband the day he passed the tapeworm. So there I was in line behind this average football dad, he had his beer and his coke and his milk and steak and his pretzels (all things my husband craved when he had his tapeworm- although he had given them up excepting pretzels), and I am also looking around seeing the anorexic trophy wife and the bloated allergic kids eating something sugery and dyed while fingering some electronic device, and it all just hit me and at once and I thought of the most amusing idea- wouldn't it be great if I could turn to football dad and say 'Hey, good to meet you. You know, I just wanted to tell you, in case you are interested, you have probably about a 3 foot tapeworm in you, at least, I would say? And you can treat it and feel much better and not smell so awful anymore' And that made me laugh a pretty good laugh, and so I headed out of the store feeling like some sort of wizzard amidst the uninitiated masses instead of some sort of broken, defeated idiot. I see sick people. That is my superpower. And we all have superpowers here. So the last thing I have done practically along these lines is to just completely dive in and immerse myself in everything I can to gain knowledge in health and healing. And while doing this, I heal myself (and my husband) so that I can be stronger in healing my daughter. It was hard to come to the realization that my illness had in large part caused my daughter's illness, but it has (albeit exacerbated by environment and even 'delayed and selective' vaccination- GRRRRR to that notion of safety! Damn you Dr. Sears, shame on you). And the day I realized this, I started taking on healing my inflammation and my viruses and my metals and my parasites too. And this has brought increased vitality and strength and mental clarity that I have not known my whole life. So while we still see setbacks in Mia's issues, and go through bawling waves of sadness each time we 'lose her' a little briefly again- when yeast or metals or something else spikes, I now am no longer frankly mentally ill (brain fog, cyclic hormones) and I can handle it better. Not that it is ever easy, but it doesn't throw me into the depths of despair. So to add to the brilliant wisdom that everyone has shared, I repeat a little and champion also focusing on two things- PROTECT yourself, and HEAL yourself. Now hopefully I can hold onto this advice myself through the next tough time!!!!!!!! It gets increasingly easy. . . . Love to you and to all of us and our kids, love love love love, :) Oh, and I agree on the fear of being less thing and how most people in mainstream are just trying so hard to fit into something at the sake of their own selves. I see this everytime someone mainstreamy finds out we don't watch TV. I never say it with judgement, usually I kindly say it apologetically. The first thing out of everyone's lips are all of these defensive things, sometimes attacking things. The inner judgement is there and me being different pulls it out and an unexmained gut reaction is just to degredate their own selves or me. I think everyone has a little terror in them concerning vaccines. And they had to override this natural terror by creating some strong front of reason, and to see an Autistic child, which they may have vaguely heard might be related to vaccines, it stirs up a lot of fear and defense. They want to blame the parent or genetics or some other magic thing that will insulate and protect them from it. Heavens, I have yarned on long enough and still not said in great measure what I meant. . . . > > Alberta, > Wow! your compliment is really just ..blows me away. Strong and knowledgeable? > .. that means a lot coming from an amazing woman like yourself!  never thought of myself as that ever! i usually beat myself up of bein weak and not knowing enuff! you were so right thou...autism has really peeled away so much nonsense in my brain and spirit..like who gets to say what is a successful person? and what is real? i mean most people like you said,are so busy trying to fit a mold of normal because they dont know how to be real..and they are always scared of being found out as less....so  they do target anyone that they can cast judgement on..makes them feel better. > all these posts im reading tonight gonna make me cry.. > this group is full of amazing brilliant strong women and guys..Im strong becuase you all give me strength and I am knowledgeable cuz of all you smarty pants that share. > God has his angels on this group I just feel it ! > xoxoxo channa >  > > > ________________________________ > > To: mb12valtrex > Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AM > Subject: Re: How do you cope? > > >  > @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person. > > >> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of  my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom... > I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya... > > / " \ > |\./| > | | > | | > |>~<| > | | > /'\| |/'\.. > /~\| | | | \ > | =[@]= | | \ > | | | | | \ > | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` ) > | / > \ / > \ / > \ _____ / > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Oh Tasha, I'm so sorry, Sweetie. I think (most) of my husband's family thinks I'm nuts, but atleast they're encouraging to my face and would never dream of fighting with me. My mom is convinced she can "knock it out of my son" with "one good week at her house" - she makes her snide remarks, but there's a certain line she would not cross. I can not imagine the burden of recovery coupled with relatives fighting me tooth and nail. You hang in there - when you close your eyes to sleep at night (even if it's only for three hours at a shot), atleast you know you're doing everything you can for your son. We all know we can't go along with the rest of the world. Maybe you can explain to your son that junk food makes EVERYone sick. Some people get very sick from it right away (like him) and for some people, it takes a long long time. Sometimes years. BUT, when it takes that long to get sick, it takes even longer to get better. We are probably all saving our children from depression, crohns, IBS, arthritis,alzheimers, obesity, dementia, cancer....the list goes on and on and on. Sadly years from now, your relatives will probably be too wrapped up in the own illness and spending half their days in line at the pharmacy while your child enjoys good health. It amazes me the way nobody gives a second thought to the kid bringing twinkies and kool-aid for lunch. But God forbid, don't tell someone your kid isn't allowed - they look at you like you have two heads. Let 'em. p.S. I just read an article this morning about how they're finding mercury in high fructose corn syrup. surprise!!! -Tammy To: mb12valtrex Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2011 10:17 AMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Not easily. My son is 9 years old and I'm still trying my hardest to get him well. We have made some amazing progress but I'm constantly reminded how quickly he can slide back from the slightest insult to his fragile system. I have lost my relationships with my entire family (except my husband who understands - thank God). The rest of my family members refuse to accept any of my son's diagnosis which have been ADHD, ODD, PDD-NOS and LD. They have made it known that the only reasons for his issues must be due poor parenting. They also think I'm nuts and depriving my child by doing dietary interventions and have gone behind my back sneaking him junk food every chance they got. My son still gets sick often so they say "obviously your diet and vitamins don't work" (CLUELESS!). On top of all this my son resents me for fighting with them constantly. He is an only child and wants to spend time with his extended family but can't due to their ignorance. I haven't met anyone in our area with a child my son's age who is on a healthy diet. His friends all eat unlimited junk food. My son asks me why they drink soda and eat candy and don't get sick? This is not an easy path in life that we've been given, that's for sure. The stress of it all has caused me to develop my own slew of medical issues. Some of the worst days for me have been when we are both sick at the same time. Although, I have my husband's support he doesn't have the intuition that I have to know what my child needs when he is sick so I have to get up and do it no matter how bad I'm feeling myself. I have to believe that there is a reason for everything and that some day my child will be happy and healthy and able to understand. And I know for a fact how much worse off my child would be if I wasn't doing interventions. That's what keeps me going. And of course, my online groups, I'm sure I would have lost my mind without them :-} Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Every single bit of that rings with so much truth. I have said a thousand times: "Why on earth would I want my kid to blend in with the rest of the world? The rest of the world sucks". What I love most about our kids: They have no knowledge or concept of sheep mentality. They will not conform. Ever notice how crazy this drives people? Lmaoooooo.... Awesome post, . To: mb12valtrex Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2011 12:28 PMSubject: Re: How do you cope? Yes Channa, strong and knowledgeable!! Honestly a day doesn't go by that I am not grateful and amazed and in awe at the strength and knowledge of all of you women out there. I think we feel so weak often because we are under such great strain. But like steel tempered by heating and beating in the fire, we can come out stronger in fits and starts. That being said, for me, there are the more thin or transparent times, when I can't take it anymore and terrible, dooming thoughts fill my mind. I am learning to have compassion for myself then. To forgive myself of any guilt or for wavering in exhaustion. And to allow myself the time to not 'do' anything- to not to anything 'right' or 'best', and to just get through the days and be alright with that. Everyone has said so much and I have been strengthened by reading all of these posts. I also could talk for hours on how spirituality has helped. But I am thinking at the moment about a very practical thing to do over time. That is to leave the old and create the new. We moved far away from family instinctually and this has been the best thing we ever did. They were not helpful and even the phone conversations make me ill, so I chucked my cell phone (gladly and then found out that it is recommended in the Klinghardt protocol!) and when prodded after this kept saying, nicely, 'surprise, surprise, I am not home very often so am hard to catch there, Mom and sis!'. Seriously, my first obligation is to my health and my family's health, including mental health, so I am getting quite strong in my resolution to kick out anything- literally anything, that takes away from this ability. One thing I've done is to really just generally not be around people who might judge. I don't go to playgrounds anymore. They drive me completely nuts. I would rather stick a hot poker in both of my eyes than go to a playground. So last Spring we bought a small, cheap metal swingset and the girls love it. We invite people over who I know are kind and decent and won't spend the whole visit fighting over swings or playing cops and robbers or otherwise doing things that will drive my Aspie Mia into a series of screaming, crying fits.I don't go to regular grocery stores anymore either. I only go to small health food stores (in our area the prices are cheaper), use buying clubs (very cheap, and where at pick up I meet other health minded people), and when I have to, go to stores like Whole Foods. I know this isn't an option for everyone everywhere. The last time I went to a regular store, I looked and looked and finally said to my husband, 'Do they even have food in here?' Everything was so packaged and processed. I invest a lot of energy into make friends with farmers and trade labor for food. I try to learn my local area and harvest wild edibles, and grow as much food as I can. Again, I know these things aren't available for everyone everwhere- we are finding ourselves in a virtual eden of food here in Portland, Oregon. But my point is, I isolate myself from obnoxious, white bread, judgemental people and find any possible resources I can in the health community. In my experience, people in the health community don't even see 'Autistic'- especially not as a 'behavioral' or 'psychiatric' condition. Most of the time all I have to say is 'Mia is recovering from Aspergers' and folks shake their heads and start to talk about all of the issues we are so entrenched in here. Hanging out with these people takes me out of the trenches and onto main street. There is an enormous movement of people convinced that our world is poisoned and that this poisoning is causing all of these health problems. We also don't do school. We tried it for a week for Mia this year as she hit kindergarten age. She started hitting herself all night and chewing her collars to bits. It was too much social stress for her. I have a picture of her that the school took during that week, and it makes me cry everytime I see it. She was dying. So we embraced and dove into the homeschooling community. We found like minded people, many also with 'special needs' kids, and found an education style, Waldorf, that supports teaching only to developmental stages, teaching the whole child, and within the whole family. All of the Waldorf resources we need are free and we've really turned our whole house around to this nice, comforting, supportive place where we do things as we can each day while supporting one another. When the spikes of bad days (or weeks, or months) come, it is from this foundation that we can with confidence just drop everything and force drinking or eating or PT or a whole new protocol whatever will help us get through it. I know also that not everyone can do this either, but getting back to the main point I am trying to say- We are slowly but steadily creating a world where I don't see miss Soccer Mom with new tight jeans on (who can afford new clothes when doing biomed?!) happily shoving chicken nuggets and some orange freezy things into her kids' mouth with apparently no repercussions. One simple thing I do as a general rule is not go out when really busy mainstream people are out. No grocery shopping at 3:30. I'll go at 7 or 8 pm if I can't go in the morning. No out to dinner (we can't afford it or eat most of it anyway) at 6pm. If we can go to a place, we get there right at 5pm on the odd day that is possible, and that's that. We leave just as miss smarty pants and her charming husband and their flock are showing up.I just generally try to lessen my exposure to 'normal' people. It is funny, after doing this for a while, I go to the regular grocery store and I am overwhelmed to realize that all of these normal people are actually quite ill. The last time I went to said Safeway, I saw kids that were bloated with dark circles under their eyes, a mom who was seriously anorexic, and I stood in line behind a guy who literally reaked of the smell my husband used to have when he had a tapeworm. The smell left my husband the day he passed the tapeworm. So there I was in line behind this average football dad, he had his beer and his coke and his milk and steak and his pretzels (all things my husband craved when he had his tapeworm- although he had given them up excepting pretzels), and I am also looking around seeing the anorexic trophy wife and the bloated allergic kids eating something sugery and dyed while fingering some electronic device, and it all just hit me and at once and I thought of the most amusing idea- wouldn't it be great if I could turn to football dad and say 'Hey, good to meet you. You know, I just wanted to tell you, in case you are interested, you have probably about a 3 foot tapeworm in you, at least, I would say? And you can treat it and feel much better and not smell so awful anymore' And that made me laugh a pretty good laugh, and so I headed out of the store feeling like some sort of wizzard amidst the uninitiated masses instead of some sort of broken, defeated idiot. I see sick people. That is my superpower.And we all have superpowers here.So the last thing I have done practically along these lines is to just completely dive in and immerse myself in everything I can to gain knowledge in health and healing. And while doing this, I heal myself (and my husband) so that I can be stronger in healing my daughter. It was hard to come to the realization that my illness had in large part caused my daughter's illness, but it has (albeit exacerbated by environment and even 'delayed and selective' vaccination- GRRRRR to that notion of safety! Damn you Dr. Sears, shame on you). And the day I realized this, I started taking on healing my inflammation and my viruses and my metals and my parasites too. And this has brought increased vitality and strength and mental clarity that I have not known my whole life. So while we still see setbacks in Mia's issues, and go through bawling waves of sadness each time we 'lose her' a little briefly again- when yeast or metals or something else spikes, I now am no longer frankly mentally ill (brain fog, cyclic hormones) and I can handle it better. Not that it is ever easy, but it doesn't throw me into the depths of despair.So to add to the brilliant wisdom that everyone has shared, I repeat a little and champion also focusing on two things- PROTECT yourself, and HEAL yourself. Now hopefully I can hold onto this advice myself through the next tough time!!!!!!!! It gets increasingly easy. . . . Love to you and to all of us and our kids, love love love love,:) Oh, and I agree on the fear of being less thing and how most people in mainstream are just trying so hard to fit into something at the sake of their own selves. I see this everytime someone mainstreamy finds out we don't watch TV. I never say it with judgement, usually I kindly say it apologetically. The first thing out of everyone's lips are all of these defensive things, sometimes attacking things. The inner judgement is there and me being different pulls it out and an unexmained gut reaction is just to degredate their own selves or me. I think everyone has a little terror in them concerning vaccines. And they had to override this natural terror by creating some strong front of reason, and to see an Autistic child, which they may have vaguely heard might be related to vaccines, it stirs up a lot of fear and defense. They want to blame the parent or genetics or some other magic thing that will insulate and protect them from it. Heavens, I have yarned on long enough and still not said in great measure what I meant. . . .>> Alberta, > Wow! your compliment is really just ..blows me away. Strong and knowledgeable?> .. that means a lot coming from an amazing woman like yourself!  never thought of myself as that ever! i usually beat myself up of bein weak and not knowing enuff! you were so right thou...autism has really peeled away so much nonsense in my brain and spirit..like who gets to say what is a successful person? and what is real? i mean most people like you said,are so busy trying to fit a mold of normal because they dont know how to be real..and they are always scared of being found out as less....so  they do target anyone that they can cast judgement on..makes them feel better.> all these posts im reading tonight gonna make me cry..> this group is full of amazing brilliant strong women and guys..Im strong becuase you all give me strength and I am knowledgeable cuz of all you smarty pants that share.> God has his angels on this group I just feel it !> xoxoxo channa>  > > > ________________________________> > To: mb12valtrex > Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:41 AM> Subject: Re: How do you cope?> > >  > @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.> > >> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of  my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...> I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya...> > /"\> |\./|> | |> | |> |>~<|> | |> /'\| |/'\..> /~\| | | | \> | =[@]= | | \> | | | | | \> | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` )> | /> \ /> \ /> \ _____ /> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011  ?? Wait! You mean all these efforts aren't all about your kids wearing baggy-ass gangster styles?? Re: How do you cope?> > >  > @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.> > >> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of  my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...> I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya...> > /"\> |\./|> | |> | |> |>~<|> | |> /'\| |/'\..> /~\| | | | \> | =[@]= | | \> | | | | | \> | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` )> | /> \ /> \ /> \ _____ /> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 lolllll To: mb12valtrex Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2011 1:21 PMSubject: Re: Re: How do you cope?  ?? Wait! You mean all these efforts aren't all about your kids wearing baggy-ass gangster styles?? Re: How do you cope?> > >  > @ Channa: Honestly, you're one of the strongest and most knowledgeable people in many of the groups I've read. I really respect your courage to stand up to that abusive jerk guy...and honestly, I think your situation and your son has brought out the absolute best in you and it sounds as though it has made you a stronger and better person.> > >> I cant tell you how many times I would leave a store or park/library in tears...not becuase of  my son but of the cruel smirks and stares of some soccer mom...> I know these people you talk about. They think they're better moms than us because they're all up to date on their children's vaccine schedules, follow their pediatrician's advice to the letter...I know. But then, again, I've almost always walked around with a shaved head and camo pants, so these looks are nothing new to me. I think this particular archetype you're talking about is uninteresting and they're like that because they know they're boring and uninteresting people, so they have to try to make people feel bad for being anything out of the ordinary because they cling to the ordinary for their dear lives. They use this as a way of telling themselves that they are better than me, but I already know I lead a more fun and fulfilling life in more ways than they'll ever be able to imagine. Hey, you, chicky poo with the smirk at my ASD kids, I got somethin' for ya...> > /"\> |\./|> | |> | |> |>~<|> | |> /'\| |/'\..> /~\| | | | \> | =[@]= | | \> | | | | | \> | ~ ~ ~ ~ |` )> | /> \ /> \ /> \ _____ /> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 Tammy,I'm two seconds from going native. Or 20k, maybe. LOL I am ready girl!!!  Every single bit of that rings with so much truth. I have said a thousand times: " Why on earth would I want my kid to blend in with the rest of the world? The rest of the world sucks " . What I love most about our kids: They have no knowledge or concept of sheep mentality. They will not conform. Ever notice how crazy this drives people? Lmaoooooo.... Awesome post, .-- Toni------Mind like a steel trap...Rusty and illegal in 37 states. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2011 Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 I trimmed 's post for sake of space on the digest list and just left a few comments I want to comment on. Please see her whole lovely post if you missed it. I, too, have found that I just have to redefine my life and limit it - whether that be what we do as a whole family or even me by myself. We have friends who have been our friends forever, but their children are not nice to my youngest son. And they don't see it. I can't talk to them about it because they won't see it and it will just cause hurt feelings without positive change. So I have had to purposely be unavailable to get together when it involves the kids. We have had to give up social/spiritual situations that were very important to us because of it which is sad, but our son's well being is more important, so there it is. Our problem is that I cannot find the people (children) who are decent and kind. I know they are out there, but I don't know how to connect with them. We also homeschool and have for 15 years. I cannot find friends for my son in this group, because even though I am sure there are great kids, everything that is done with the children is either way too highly structured and school-like or way too disorganized, loud, and random. Neither of these situations work for my youngest son. Even the park play days are too over-stimulating. If we go to the park and play just as a family and the boys make maybe one new friend, it's fine. But when we try to go to the park and meet up with a whole bunch of homeschool families and all their kids running around together, my son gets anxious and starts trying to control everything. I try occasionally and it goes disastrously and then I wait a long time before I try again. Haha. I tried at the beginning of the school year and my son's anxiety/controlling behavior started to escalate and when it was time to leave, he had a massive 2 yr old tantrum about leaving (he is six.) Even though I have homeschooled and been a part of this group for so many years, I didn't know any of the families there. Sigh. My son does so much better when insulated. And that's okay. The biggest problem is that he has a typical 8 yr old brother who shouldn't be insulated all the time. It often seems impossible to meet everyone's needs. I am grateful for my blessings, so I don't mean to sound like I am complaining. I just haven't yet figured out how to balance everyone's needs. Cathy >That is to leave the old and create the new. > We invite people over who I know are kind and decent and won't spend the whole visit fighting over swings or playing cops and robbers or otherwise doing things that will drive my Aspie Mia into a series of screaming, crying fits. > We also don't do school. > I just generally try to lessen my exposure to 'normal' people. > :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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