Classic

[Guest guest]

So, for whatever reason my parents have kicked it up a notch in recent weeks. A

quick recap: it's been 4.5 years since I've had any semblance of a relationship

with my parents, after I found out they were making disparaging comments about

my kids to their faces and when I confronted them with this information, they

made made fun of me for it, to oversimplify the situation greatly. Anyhoo, out

of the blue, two weeks ago my mom calls me at work (called the main switchboard,

patched through by an administrative assistant who assumed she was sane) and

blathered on and on about how she didn't understand why I wasn't speaking to

her, she never did anything, blah blah blah, and I hung up on her. Ten seconds

later she calls my secretary and leaves a message inviting me to lunch the

following Sunday. The following week, my dad decides to drop in unannounced at

my office. Fortunately I was in a meeting so he was sent away. Later that week

my oldest daughter (age 12) is in a musical performance. Don't know how they

found out about it but my parents are in the audience. It's open to the public,

so not much I can do about that. After the performance, I wait with my 10 year

old daughter for them to leave, only to find them milling about in the lobby

looking for us. As I am steering my 10 year old away without acknowledging their

presence, my dad makes a beeline for us, reaches across my body to grab my

daughter's shoulder and tries to strike up a conversation with her. I swat his

hand away, put a finger right up to his face and say very firmly, " No. " I swear

in that instant I felt like I was trying to train a very stubborn dog, except

for the fact that I actually like dogs quite a bit. I later discover that while

I was waiting in the auditorium, my mother had gone backstage (not open to the

public, BTW) to find my twelve year old. My daughter sees her and just starts

saying, " Leave me alone, " but had to say it about five times before she actually

complied. So yeah, super creepy (and documented if we decide to pursue legal

action).

But the icing on the cake is that yesterday was my birthday, and my husband's,

as well. My parents sent us birthday cards. My husband's arrives just fine; mine

arrives with a stamp from the postal service " postage due " . Instead of a stamp

they had put some sort of square sticker (an Easter seal, maybe?) and they

didn't put a return address on the envelope. I tossed it back in the mailbox

with " Delivery refused " written on it.

The silver lining to all of this: my twelve year old actually felt very

empowered by the backstage episode. She enforced her boundaries and made a

grown-up go away. Too bad it had to happen this way, but at least she knows how

to stand up for herself.

Grrrrrrr.